Rejecting Azrael | ✔️

CH 40 Amends

Coco's POV:

I watched as Azrael walked out of the kitchen and out of sight. My wolf whined, crying out to her mate. She missed him and wanted him back.

"We were just making food for the pack, now he's gone." Mist whimpered, curling into a ball and trying to hide her sadness.

As much as I was worried about Azrael, I needed to settle this first. It seemed too... surreal.

I was having a difficult time wrapping my mind around things.

Ignoring my wolf's cries, I turned to my mother. It was strange, having her defend me. When she did ever start doing that? Since when did she notice my heartbreak in high school?

I didn't think I was that noticeable. I wasn't sure if I should feel embarrassed or glad that she noticed. Growing up, I tried to be the perfect daughter. I had strict parents and they would lecture me for all my mistakes and compare me to other pups.

What did parents think about that? What did they think they'd accomplish? All that did was make me feel incompetent. I chased after her affection and would cause a scene at school when I was much younger... just to be noticed.

I wanted my mother's love.

I wanted my mom to praise me. For once, openly show she was proud of me. I worked my ass off for the awards and grades but... how hard is it to say she loves me or that she's glad I'm her daughter?

She doesn't hesitate to compliment others but never me. I just want her to be proud of me but soon after, I realized whatever I did was never good enough. I started to grow resentment to my mother and father. I stopped caring and did things for myself. It did hurt me to see other people have good relationships with their parents while mine was nonexistent.

I was very envious of other people who had loving parents.

Biting my lip, I asked her, "Why?"

My mother tilted her head in question. "What do you mean why? About what I said just now? You're being vague."

I sighed, "Why did you stand up for me? I thought I wasn't the daughter you wanted."

She went quiet. Her silence was growing and each second, it hurt more.

Finally, she spoke with a sad tone. "Coco... I know I hurt you. I know I'm not the best parent. I've said horrible things and I realize that. It's hard for me to explain my actions and maybe most aren't excusable, but I'm here now. When you need me most."

"What a strange woman. She said little words and seemed cold to the world. Now she's being warm to us. Maybe she doesn't want us to hurt anymore?" Mist muttered, pacing around.

I thought for a moment. My mother's words always hurt me but regardless, I would still go to her because deep down, I knew I loved her a lot.

"That still doesn't erase everything that's happened. We rarely talk and when we do, we clash heads." I snapped, tears finally pricking the edges of my eyes.

I didn't know what was with me today. I felt more sensitive than usual and my senses seemed more alert and on edge.

"I do feel a little off, human... like something is coming. I can't seem to control some of my urges for some reason..." Mist whimpered, furrowing her brows.

'Well... you better control whatever is going on. I can't control my emotions like I usually can and that irritates the fuck out of me.'

My mother seemed surprised with my words, but looked down. Thinking deeply.

"I don't have any excuses for the things I've said or done. It's in the past now and now that this has happened, it made me realize that I want to be a proper mother from now on. Just giving you the cold shoulder and assuming you can live off that and will be better off without me isn't enough." She paused, saying, "I'm sorry, Coco. I hope you can forgive me."

I was stunned.

Did she actually just apologize to me? Again? She apologized to me once before and it stunned me but it still surprises me.

One apology can't erase the scars she left on me mentally. Years I've thought I wasn't good enough for her. Now... she's reaching out to me?

Part of me wants to shut down and push her away, but I'm still a child deep down... yearning for their parents love.

"... Alright. We'll talk more about this later. Thank you for defending me." I said, looking her into the eyes.

Surprisingly, my mother laughed. "That's a relief. Oh, and don't worry about talking care of Azrael anymore. I'll talk to the Alpha and assign someone else to watch over him. You're not alone anymore." She winked, giving me a thumbs up.

For some reason... I didn't like that. My heart throbbed in pain but I wasn't sure if it was my own... or Azrael's.

I'm overthinking things.

"Okay, that sounds great. Thanks... mom."

And for a faint second, I could see a small blush spread on my mom's face.

She looks happy.

Our mother and daughter relationship wasn't the best, but at least this was a start.

A nice new beginning.