Dear Sirius...

Part 4

Remus left a couple days ago. I lied and told him that I was now fine, that I came to terms with Sirius being taken against his will. I also promised him that I would go see Harry as soon as I could. I believe that was his biggest issue about not wanting to leave. Once he finally realized that I was being serious, only then did he decide to leave.

I came up with a day to go to Number 4 Privet Drive. I wanted to give myself enough time to somewhat feel better, it didn't work. Just because I can't get over myself doesn't mean that I can drop Harry like a hat. He needs me, more than ever right now.

I make sure that I have everything prepared for my Apparition. I bring a couple of baby toys that I bought for when Lily and James would drop Harry off, too bad they will never pick him up again…

I think of where I want to go and feel a movement of air. My body is being pulled and twisted in directions. Until it stops. 

I stand outside Number 4 Privet Drive. Looks too normal and plain for anyone who would want to live a life of fun. Whoever Harry's aunt and uncle are must be some of the boring people in the world.

I walk up to the door and give it a gentle knock. A baby screaming and whining about who knows what. I don't believe that could be Harry. He was always such a good baby. Went to bed when he was supposed to, rarely ever cried, happy boy who always wanted to play with Padfoot… but people change after traumatic experiences.

The door opens to a disheveled woman. She bounces a fat baby in her arms, trying to get him to stop crying.

"What do you want?" She snaps at me.

"My name is Layla Black," I say politely. "I'm here to see Harry."

"You're one of them?" She spits.

"Uh - I knew Lily and James," I say. "I'm Harry's -"

"I don't care who you are," she cuts me off. The baby still screams in her arms, pulling on her hair. She moves out of the doorway, and ushers me insides unpleasantly.

The house was clean beside the disarray of baby toys in the sitting room.

"He's in the kitchen," she says.

I make my way towards the kitchen while she makes her way upstairs. Strange to think that she left a baby alone and a stranger to wander about her house.

I push open the kitchen door, Harry sits in a highchair eating his hands, looking confused about what's going on. He laughs excitedly when he sees me.

"Lay -," Harry mumbles trying to say my name.

I put the baby toys down onto the nearby table and pick Harry up from the highchair. I softly bounce him up and down. That's when I noticed the lightning scar across his forehead. 

So it is true, Voldemort tried to kill Harry too.

The mean lady comes back into the room, this time the baby wasn't screaming anymore. She spots me holding Harry and a sneer appears upon her face.

"How has Harry been these past few weeks?" I ask.

"Fine," she says uninterested. I'm starting to get the idea that the Dursleys don't care about Harry and his own well-being.

"Uh -" I start, trying to put my thoughts into words. "Maybe we can come to an agreement?"

"Agreement?" She asks.

"Well if you would've let me finish talking earlier," I start, "I'm Harry's godmother."

She stares at me, a small hit of malicious and fear crosses her face.

"We could do some trade off," I say, ignoring her looks.

"No," she snaps, "have Harry grow up in your filthy world? I don't think so."

"Excuse me?" I ask, turning Harry away from his ugly aunt.

"We aren't letting Harry learn to be anymore of a freak," she says.

"Then I'll take him off your hands," I say, picking up the toys I brought with me.

"You can't take him," she says. "That's not legal!"

"You're going off legality? I'm his godmother!"

"Is that in writing? For you to legally take him?"

"It's Lily and James's wish!"

"Yes, and they are dead."

I stagger back with surprise. How could she say such a thing about her own sister. I get her being rude to me, but seriously her own sister?

"If you take Harry," she says, walking towards me with a menacing finger. "We will call the cops and charge you with kidnapping. Then how will that help Harry?"

I freeze. There is no way out of this one. She is right, if I do get arrested it won't do Harry any good. I don't even dare to ask if I could at least visit Harry. Who knows what trick she has up her sleeve for that.

"The wizard line in my family," she starts, putting the baby down in another highchair. "Ends with Harry."

I look down at Harry. An obvious expression plays on his face. I can't possibly leave him here to grow up with these people. They are awful, but what choice do I have?

His aunt walks over to me and, quite forcefully, takes Harry from my arms. He starts crying immediately and tries to leave her grasp.

"Get out and never come back," she says to me.

I look between her and Harry. His beautiful green eyes harassed by tears. I forcefully have to break my gaze, small tears appear in my eyes but I blink them back. She isn't going to know that she beat me. I place the toys back down on the counter. I start walking towards the front door, stopping to give Harry one last kiss before leaving.

I close the front door behind me. Leaning against the door I let the tears freely fall from my eyes. I will find a way to see Harry if it's the last thing I do.