Dear Sirius...

Part 35

"There ya go," Andromeda says, helping me sit down onto the couch.

She pats me on the shoulder before bringing my stuff to the spare room. I'm very grateful that she understands why I need to get away from my family, why I need a break from looking at my own children.

I look around the house that I'll be staying at for the next couple days. It hasn't changed too much from the last visit. The family pictures still line walls. The same warm feeling lining each Nymphadora painting.

"Want tea darling?" Andromeda asks, coming back into view.

"Oh," I say. "Yeah, that'd be nice."

I follow her into the kitchen. She grabs a pot and puts it onto the stove. I look around, wondering where Teddy is.

"Where's Teddy?" I ask.

"He went into town," Andromeda says with a shrug.

I nod my head. Probably went to grab some stuff or something. Either way it's not my place to involve myself.

"Thank you for letting me stay here for a little," I said sitting down.

"Don't worry about it doll," she said, grabbing out two tea cups. "Everyone has to get away at some point."

"Except you," I whisper under my breath.

"Actually I had too as well."

"Wait, really?"

The teapot makes a shrieking noise, telling Andromeda that the water was finally ready for being poured.

"Here we are," she says, handing me a cup of tea. She sits down across from me.

"Andromeda," I whisper. "Please tell me why you left."

She lets out a sigh. 

"Well," she starts, "when me and Teddy had Nymphadora we didn't think she was going to be a handful. I took care of her day in and day out. Teddy was helpful, but I was still so stressed.

"Well one day I snapped. I couldn't do it anymore. Everything finally snapped and I had to get away for a couple days."

"Where did you go?" I asked.

"Into town," she said. "Stayed at a hotel for a couple days. Look Layla, just because you snapped doesn't mean you're a bad mother. You have a lot going on with you and you still need time to process."

I take a big sip from my tea. Trying to ignore the words of wisdom coming out of Andromeda's mouth.

"I know this won't help," she said, taking my right hand in hers. "But, time will heal all wounds. You just have to be willing to listen."

I give her a sweet smile. I know she is just trying to help, but cliques like that aren't going to help me. I know what I have to do, and at some point I'll wake up and have the strength to do it. But for now, I don't want to let go.

I don't want to let go of the loved ones I lost.