If All I Have Is You

I need your company. Or not.

        I got out of my bed slowly. I walked to my door and unlocked it. I opened it slowly. I peered out into the hallway. English stood there, with a small grin plastered to his face. His buck teeth stood out against the dark contrast of his skin and the hall. I opened the door and let him in. I closed the door. I crossed my arms over my chest and leaned against the door. He sat down on my bed. "Let me guess. My brother called you. He didn't want to deal with me anymore and he forced you to show up." Jake shook his head. "He didn't force me to come here. He's just worried about you Dirk. Just like I am. And Roxy. And Jane. We're all worried about you. You've ignored us for two months. What's been going on?" I sighed. He was right. I had been ignoring my friends and family. I didnt know what to say. I couldn't just out right tell him that my brother committed suicide while we were in London. But what was I going to say? I had to tell him something. "I'm just having problems with the brobots." I lied through my teeth. Jake didn't need to know that D was dead. "You're such a liar Dirk. That's not true." I rolled my eyes. "How would you know?" Jake shook his head. "One, that was a dead give away. Two, if there was a problem you would be working on the brobots right now. And three, you don't have your shades on." I opened my mouth to disagree but he held up my black framed anime shades. He smirked, twirling them around. I frowned. "That's not fair. I'm vulnerable without them. You can see my secrets." I shielded my eyes with my hand. "And your lies. What's really going on Dirk?" I sighed as I walked over to my bed. I flopped down onto the mattress next to Jake. "Alright. Y'know my bro, D, right?" He nodded. "Well while we were in London things happened. And he com...." I mumbled the last sentence. "He what?" I tried again. "He comm...." Jake turned to me. "Hm?" I narrowed my eyes. "HE COMMITTED SUICIDE!!!" I screamed. Jake flinched. "Oh my god. Dirk that's awful. I'm sorry." I crossed my legs Indian style on the bed, facing Jake. "Its fine. He was gonna die one way or another." Jake shook his head. "That's not fine." I shrugged. "Don't worry about it." Jake placed his hand on ym shoulder. "You're my friend, so I have to worry about it. I worry about you all the time. Like when we were younger and you..." He drowned on. I stopped listening. His voice was sweet, running through my brain like a soft melody. It was nice but on the other hand it was annoying. "You need some help. Therapy maybe." He was starting to get on my nerves. I didn't need him to tell me these things. I didnt need him to be here, talking down to me. I wasn't a child. Not anymore. "We could try..." I interupted him. "Shut up." I grumbled. "What?" I looked at him. "I said shut up. Stop talking to me like I'm a child. I didn't ask you to come here and say these things to me." He crooked his head to the side. "I don't..." I stopped him again. "Just stop. I don't want you here." I stood off my bed and walked over to my work bench. "Dirk, I'm only trying to help." I turned around to face Jake. "Well quit trying to "help" me Jake. I didn't ask for your help. I don't need your help. I don't want your help." I turned back to the work bench. I picked up a wrench and acted as if I was busy with something. "Just leave me alone Jake. Please." I heard him stand. I listened as his shoes made there way across my floor. The door clicked open. "I'm sorry that I bothered you mate." The closed softly behind him. I listend for the front door of the apartment to open and close. Once I knew that Jake was gone for good, I threw down my wrench. I slammed head down on the work bench and cried.