Fucking hell my neck feels like it's been snapped in five different places if that's even a fucking thing. I've got to have been lying like a bloody deck chair, my back is stiff as fuck too.
I must have slept for hours because the sun is up and the fire has burned out, the smell of the thick smoke coating my clothes.
Great, but where's my chick?
Maybe she's running off to use the toilet, she doesn't appreciate me watching her.
She didn't speak to me for a full day, still seeking me out at night.
But looking around me rubbing my eyes, all her shit is gone, no trace that she was even here in the first place. FUCK!
'ZARA.....ZARA...." I shout out while walking about like a dickhead in the forest myself. Hands cupped around my mouth to try to make myself even louder.
Fucking hell this girl drives me nuts, literally nuts.
I pack all the shit into my bag and throw it over my shoulder in a huff, stomping around like a toddler losing a toy. But she isn't just some toy, not to me, she's everything and more.
Last night was going so well, I felt like I was breaking down her walls she had built up against me from all the shit I have done. I even popped in a cheesy I love you and got nothing in return, not gonna lie that hurt like a bitch but I won't admit that to anyone.
I just want her to forgive me, the hate she has to me is still there alongside the sexual attraction.
Why didn't I just get her the fuck out of here when I first fell for her, when I knew it wasn't some mission to fulfil some shitty test.
In the process I lost basically everything and so did Zara. I mean, she lost her fucking brother and sister for fucksake.
Her sister is a snake though, I'm glad she's dead. As soon as I saw that authorization letter with her name and then her dad in a picture with my arsehole of a dad, I knew there was some sort of connection.
Zara mentioned her dad passing away not long before the bombings so he couldn't be involved
I've walked around this stupid fucking forest for ages now and still no sign of her, would she go to A-Centre? Nah, she ain't that dumb.
What if Thomas caught up and took her right under my nose? Shittttt.
I turn around to walk right up to this hangar when I'm met with a clenched fist right to my nose, my eyes watering instantly as I'm thrown back and a pair of hands grabbing my the shoulder by someone else.
"Where the fuck is she, Theo?" A shaking Thomas yells in my face, spitting on each word with his eyes blazing.
The cunt doesn't even give me a chance to fucking answer, he blows another fist into my side knocking all the wind out of me, fuck this kid has a good hit.
Once I stop coughing and feeling like my eyes were popping out, blood dripping from my nose I managed to tell him to stop.
"She's gone." I pant out, still out of breath from the dig in the side while spitting out the blood trickling over my lips.
If I wasn't close to folding over right now I would kick this guys head in.
"She fucked off while I was asleep, I thought you got your shitty little hands on her." I stand up and push off the person hands behind me that were holding me still. I turn around to see it's Crawford and Drew, growling at me so badly I'm surprised they aren't baring teeth.
I'm surprised at Drew, he was my good friend this whole time and even before all this bullshit but he has obviously taken this pricks side. I guess growing up together alongside Alex doesn't mean shit to him anymore.
I rub the blood with my sleeve and glared at Thomas.
"I know why your after her, I won't let you near her so you'll need to go through me. All of you." I nod to Thomas and prepare for a beating that will most likely knock me unconscious.
Thomas looks confused, scrunching up his face when he shakes his head.
"After her? Why would I be after her?" He pulls me by the collar, bringing his face to my bloody one. "You better not have hurt her, I'll fucking kill you."
Yeah, this stupid bastard is about to see the bottom side of my shoe when I repeatedly stamp on his head if he speaks to me like that again.
"I know what they did to you up there, I'm not stupid and I know why your after Zara, you can stay the fuck away from her." I push him away and pick up my bag, slinging it over my shoulders once more.
I need to get far away from this dick before I do something I regret, something that will make Zara hate me forever. He's testing my patience here, even if he is now appearing calm.
"We didn't make it to A-centre, the three of us escaped and right away we came looking for Zara, but you took her as soon as you saw the opportunity, didn't you?" He's all up in my face again, when the fuck did this arsehole grow a set of balls, acting as if he could actually take me.
"We had to run, they came after us for weeks! You're one to talk. I bet when I left you tried your best to wriggle your way in with her, didn't quite work out for you, did it?" I say to him smugly, shoving him backwards with both hands.
This shit is getting us nowhere but I love that I can rub in his face that she's still MY Zara. I'm the one who has her screaming in pleasure while I'm deep in between her legs, not him.
I'm the one who taught her everything she knows in the bedroom, only I know what it's like to be deep inside of her.
"I didn't need to do much wriggling, she's always been mine."
On that note, I fly for him once more but Drew and Crawford stop me by pinning me to the ground with their knees in my chest.
"Fucking stop it the both of you man, she's not here Thomas so let's keep moving." Crawford butts in, clearly as fed up as I am with this back and forth tiff.
The both of them climb off me and help me up, I glare at them both and patt down the dirt from my clothes
What did he mean he didn't do much wriggling? she said nothing happened between them while I was away. This shit is gonna fuck with my head even more now, she is fucking with my head again and even worse I'm walking side by side with fucking Thomas while we try to find her.
We agreed that she may have felt like the hero and headed up herself, typical Zara. Trying to save everyone and anyone. We are halfway there and no one has made a sound until Crawford clears his throat.
"What the hell happened to you man, your dad is now alive and what.... the leader of A-Centre?" Crawford asked from behind me, he's a little slow on picking things up so I'm not surprised this is all he has to fucking say.
"Leave it, Crawf. The guy is a prick." Thomas says, Drew staying silent in the back because he fucking knew.
"I'm just saying, all this time you acted like you were on our side when you were one of the 'pricks' yourself." His tone is starting to edge, laced with annoyance.
These guys are doing my fucking head in.
"Don't associate me with him, I mean it. Drop it." I say while pushing the straps of my bag off my shoulder to get a drink of water. Thomas and Drew doing the same.
Thomas throws his bottle back into his bag and walks past me and intentionally lets his shoulder hit me, telling me to follow him without the other two. I roll my eyes and follow him until we are out of earshot from Drew and Crawford.
"Look, we both obviously love this girl and she did mess us both around a bit. She made her decision and I need you to respect that." He says to me, pressing his lips to a straight line waiting for my reply.
"I'll ask Zara what she wants when I get her back." Looking down at him, smirking.
Just when he was about to say something else that was most probably a load of bollocks about how she loves him or I'm not good enough for her...
"Hey, guys! Is this Zara's bag?" Drew shouts down, holding a pink rucksack I had packed for her.
Fuck.
-OLD VERSION-UNEDITED (THE WRITING IS MAKING ME ILL)