Vivian's POV:
That night, I had a dream and not the Martin Luther Jr. kind of dream.
In my feverish state, I could feel hot lips on mine as hands explored my body.
***
I moaned at the dried pleasurable taste, and steadily my eyes opened. "L-Liam?"
I felt like I had been walking in the desert for days, begging for a cup of water.
He placed a burning hand on mine. "Vivian...I want you," he whispered sweetly.
Liam was in so much pain, his natural complexion paled. His natural tanned skin sunk into a shade that sulks into my dangerous heart.
Don't take him back.
His muddy eyes close, and he sucks himself into the endless abyss, as the tears drip down his structured cheeks.
Don't take him back.
All I wanted to do is run my fingers through his midnight hair that refused to be tamed.
Don't take him back.
The thumping inside my chest refused to settle as he grasps my palm. Gently, he brought it towards his soft lips. From time to time, my eyes wither from his features towards the ring on his left finger.
Don't take him back.
The one he never took off.
"Please, take me back."
And as I laid there on my restless state, I smiled, "Yes."
***
When I woke up, Liam was staring at me.
I groaned, barely recalling anything that happened after Liam had forced me into bed, "What?" I don't even want to know what he is thinking this early in the morning.
"Why are you in my bed?" That question would've sounded so hateful before, but now, passing all my hostility. I can pick up his confusion.
I rolled away from Liam because it was too sweaty.
"I didn't mean it like that," he quickly said.
I was laying on my stomach, peeking at him. He was sitting upward, his wrinkled shirt seemingly wrinkled onto his body. He looked better than yesterday, which isn't a surprise since we practically sweat out our fever. I was too tired to respond due to his tight embracement all night.
"If you want to sleep here further. I wouldn't mind." He sucked in his cheeks and look away.
"I brought you water, and you threw me on the bed." My sentence clearly had many meanings.
I waited for him to respond.
Liam's face twisted, into an extremely unsightly look, "Did I...Did I rape you again?"
My eyes shot open, and I sat upward on my knees, "What?" I attempted to gasp for words. "R-Rape? Did you just say rape?"
"Yes."
"Rape who?"
"You."
"Who rape who?"
"I rape you."
"When?!" I was getting more and more freaked out by the second.
"When you were 16."
I took a few blinks, recalling what had occurred four years ago at Jack's party. "Are...Are you crazy?"
I feel like I'm the one going crazy.
He exhaled and grabbed his phone, "Here."
"Huh? What do you want me to do with your phone?"
"You need to call the authorities."
I didn't understand what was going on, but I know getting angry wouldn't help. So, I took a few deep breaths to calm myself down, "You know what? I am going to make a phone call. Wait here." I grabbed his phone and went to the other bedroom.
"Wow. No passcode," I mumbled to myself before searching for Harper which I assumed to be Miss Harper.
The phone rang twice, "Hello?" I was greeted by a tired voice and yawn.
"Harper? This is Vivian."
"Good morning, Vivian. How can I help you?"
I discussed to Harper about the situation and the conversation Liam and I had earlier.
"He...what to you?" Harper shouted, "Lawson! Did you know anything this?"
"No, sweetheart. I know nothing! How dare he take advantage of an intoxicated woman. I have a lot of things to say to that boy. I swear, I'll give him a good earful," Lawson said. "So, rest sweetheart. You don't have to talk to him."
Harper released a deep breath, "Okay-" she sighed once more, "Vivian. Please, tell me you don't think...that Liam-"
"Oh, no! No! No! I mean, I barely remembered that night but I wouldn't consider-" I closed my eyes and sat on the bed, "I'm just glad that it was Liam and not a random stranger."
"My best advice? Clear things up and tell Liam straight up that you didn't consider that night to be what he thinks it is. From his perspective, he believes that he did something horrible, and he deserves a punishment. That's how Liam perceive or was taught since childhood; whenever he does something unacceptable, he waits for the consequences. Since you didn't give him any, his guilt will escalate until he receives it."
"Okay. Thanks, Harper."
"And tell Liam. Lawson will talk to him later in regards to keeping secrets. Okay, Vivian?"
"Oh, okay?"
Lawson exhaled, "Thanks."
"Goodbye, Vivian. Call me if you need anything else."
"Okay. Bye, Harper."
"Bye!" Lawson shouted.
I allow the phone call to end before inhaling and exhaling. Gripping onto the device, I held my head up and high and went back into the other room. Liam was still sitting on the bed; his eyes instantly shot towards me.
I sat down on the edge of the bed, beside him. Liam began clenching his hands firmly together as his eyes wavered away from mine. I breathe out, placing a palm on top of his. "Liam...Let's talk."
We spent nearly the whole day in the bedroom, discussing everything. From our first meeting to our engagement, our marriage, and anything in relations to each other.
Together, we smiled...laughed...cried.
It felt as if our lives are finally taking its steps out of the shadows.
We laid in bed together, and with each grinned from him; my breath was stolen. Suddenly, my defenses collapsed, and I cried, "I thought you hated me, Liam. When you told me that you would never marry me in the cafeteria. It broke my heart."
Before I can draw another air in my clotted nostrils; Liam asked: "May I hug you?"
I hit his chest. "This is the time to hug me stupid."
I can feel his firm torso pressed against my body, his heartbeats against my palms. "I'm sorry for being stupid." His hands are folded around my back, patting it gently.
My whole body shake, crying for the missed time we will never get back, crying to release the tension of these exhausting years. "Stupid. Stupid. Stupid!" I muffled into his chest. I was angry but mostly upset.
I cried so hard that I fell asleep.
When we woke up, we continued our talk.
"I didn't know that I liked you until much...much later. I'm always looking at you whenever we're in the hallway together, but I've always felt like I wasn't good enough. I'm damaged. I'm undesirable. I'm someone who can't make you or anyone happy."
Liam wore a face like he was expecting me to get angry or upset; to validate his words, "Who says you're damaged and undesirable?"
"I don't need words to understand...that my parents would want a son who isn't mentally handicapped. Anyone...who finds out about my condition always changed. That's enough to tell me, I'm different."
I placed my hand on his cheek, straying the thumb across his cheekbones.
He held onto my hand. "You don't feel disgusting touching me?"
There was so much misplaced guilt inside him. Guilt for everyone around him; how he is nothing more than a burden.
In truth, he tries his best to fit in society; desperately enrolling himself into a crowd. His brain takes a different route, but he still ends up wanting the same thing as everyone else.
He isn't different from any bystander, but at the same time, he is clearly his own person.
So, why am I like this?
Why am I treating him like there is something wrong when there is clearly nothing?
At that moment, I felt like a fool. I was behaving so cautious around him, that I hurt him. I pained him straight at the wound.
"I never felt disgusted." I smiled, "Never."
"Then, can I hug you again?"
I nodded, and he pulled me into another round of embracement. His arms were so gentle where it gave me enough space to breathe.
But, while I rested there, I understand that we needed to clarity in our complicated relationship. "Liam." I pulled back, and he released me. "About our relationship...I need you to understand that we can't be together...for now. I need to figure out my emotions for you because this is new to me. It feels good to clear up all the misunderstanding. So freaking good-" I laughed, the tears still falling, "But, we can't simply get back together. You do understand, right?"
Liam nodded, "It's difficult for you, and I am willing to wait for you to...to like me."
"Liam, you don't have to wait for me...We're divorced...If you like someone else. I won't stop you."
His face twisted, "Divorced."
"Liam."
He cleared his throat.
"Liam!"
He puffed one side of his cheek and look away.
"Liam. We are divorced, right?" I emphasize, "Right?"
He glanced at me, rubbing his most likely sore arm. "I didn't sign it." Another bomb dropped. "I couldn't...I didn't want to divorce you."
A part of me wants to embrace him, and another portion wished to smack him.
I groaned, planting my face in my hands. I wasn't even mad because there was a part of me that had always been suspicious.
"I need to use the restroom," he said, and I merely nodded.
Liam was in the bathroom for an hour.
"Are you dead?" I shouted.
The door clicked open, and Liam stood in front of me. He clenched his fists, "Will you date me?"
I closed my eyes and opened them, ensuring I wasn't seeing or hearing things inaccurately. "What?" What the fricky fuck happened in the restroom?
"Vivian Blanc. Please, date me."
My silence was freaking him out. I would know it, even if it wasn't shown on his face.
"You may take your time. I will not push you into liking me if you do not. Please, do not take too long in responding. If you do not want to date me and you no longer want to have any interactions together. I will sign the divorced papers right away." His words sounded extremely scripted.
"Did...Did you stay in the bathroom for an hour to come up with that?"
His cheeks turned red. Busted. "Pardon me, but I have to start the day." He walked into his closet and closed the door.
I exhaled, knowing there is a smile on my face. "I'm going to start my day too," I shouted. "Despite it being dark already," I grumbled, rubbing my stomach. I decided to go grabbed something since I haven't eaten the whole day.
After changing inside the bedroom, of Amoli and me, I noticed something particular. All of Amoli's clothes were gone. "Oh shit," I hissed underneath my breath before rushing out of the room towards the front door.
There was a taxi, and Amoli was shoving suitcases inside. Mauricio was present, talking to her. "Amoli!" I shouted. She turned around and smiled, dimly. I rushed towards her, "Where are you going?"
"Home."
I exhaled, "Okay. I'll see you at the apartment." I looked at Mauricio who turned his head, "We can talk."
Amoli shook her head, "No. Home. I'm going home, Viv."
I took a pause to allow the information to wired inside my mind. "Home?" She nodded, "Like India home?"
She nodded once more. "The past few weeks living here and what had happened with Matt." She exhaled, "My parents were right. I'm not cut out for this lifestyle. I'm not like you, Viv."
I took her farther away from the guys who were clearly eavesdropping. "What are you talking about Li? You moved out, across the world, ever since you were 18 and lived by yourself."
"Yes, with my parents' allowance." She ran her fingers through her hair and exhaled. Her eyes brimmed with water. "I haven't survived on my own...at all Viv. Even when I moved out, everything was supported by my parents. From the rent to the clothes on my back."
"But, you've been doing well ever since you stood up to your parents and confronted them about college."
"Who are we joking Viv? We only survived because you got that job than we got lucky and got picked up by fucking heirs who got nothing better to do. We both know our incomes aren't going covering our lives."
"So, what? You're just going to give up?"
"Last night...When I was by myself. I did some thinking." She inhaled a deep breath, "Matt was right. I dated him for bragging rights and his money." She laughed, a sad tearful laughter, "I couldn't stray away from the wealthy lifestyle."
She hugged me, "I wish you all the best...truly. I know you can do it."
I stood there, staring at the black car that drove my friend far far away.
"She's gone," I whispered lowly, curling my hands up. I was feeling distraught.
"Where the fuck is that asshole!" I know it was illogical of me to blame Matt, but I'm so fucking furious that I can't think straight.
"Matthew Greyson! Matthew fucking Greyson!" I pounded on his bedroom door.
"He's gone," Mauricio said, "He left with Jack this morning."
"Where?"
"Chicago."
I used one day for myself, to sort out my life, and suddenly everyone leaves. I groaned, sliding my back against the door, "Ah...Fuck."