Song: Kehlani - Gangsta
•Play where I say, coz it's mandatory •
•••
If something burns your soul with purpose and desire, it's your duty to be reduced to ashes by it. Any other form of existence will be yet another dull book in the library of life.
- Charles Bukowski
[My favourite quote!]
•••
Ava
"Can you take me to him?"
"W-what?" Vicentè stuttered, choking on his words as his eyes glazed with fear. What I had just uttered was no intention of mine; I just said it out loud, shocking me in the same time at the meaning it held.
What would be my first reaction if I see him? Probably - anger, rage and disappointment.
Disappointment was more of an understatement.
"What!?" Drake chimed in.
Vicentè stuffed his hands under his jacket and gave me an overall look. "Are you out of your mind, Ms. Knights? That's probably impossible. We, Italians barely get to see him and you're a British. Who do you think you are?"
Someone who he used to be with...
I swallowed, breaking his judging gaze and shifted awkwardly. "Please..." I whispered uncertainly. For a second, I let my guard down, my hands shaking with the uneasiness that followed down my spine.
But I pulled myself together. I couldn't be weak, I didn't deserve to be weak. I had come so far, I wouldn't make a simple thought to ruin myself.
Drake caught my elbow and pulled me aside, he was concerned and curious as he asked me in a low voice, "I don't know if I have any say in this, So I'm not gonna stop you, Ava. But are you sure?"
For once, I thought I regretted the decision to come here when he uttered, "Are you capable of facing that bāstard again?"
Hearing this, Vicentè grew angry, "Did you just call the king a bastardo!? Are you insane? Gesù Cristo [Jesus Christ]!" He stopped before looking behind him, ushering us inside and said with a sigh. "You should be thankful that no one overhead your stupid words. God Forbid, they would slice me into half with you both!"
I rolled my eyes and grimaced, "They wouldn't dare to--" I started but he hushed me.
"They can, they definitely can! I made a big mistake by renting you my house. Pack your things and leave as soon as possible, I cannot tolerate disrespect for our King and I do not fancy living in dungeons. Please get out of my house!"
Drake was the first to react because right now, all I cared was I wanted to see Aaron. I didn't come here for nothing and I sure as hell didn't come here for long.
I headed to my room and started looking through my clothes, searching for the one thing Dad handed me before leaving London. My heart beat rose the more I kept shuffling the clothes, wrinkling them. The moment I found it, I stopped breathing. I had to try calm the erratic sensation that coursed throughout my system, making me unable to grab the heavy object.
Somehow, I held it up to my eyes. I was blinded by the crack of dawn, the slight sunlight rays that fell through the windows, reaching down the silver metal.
This was the strangest thing to ever happen in my entire existence.
As I exited my room, I realised that Vicentè had lighten up a little, leaning against the couch with Drake talking to him. He looked at my direction and his gaze zeroed up on my hand, eyeing my calculated steps.
I didn't know I would go this far but the bizarre sensation inside, or was it called the devil on my shoulder, manipulating me into something that was unpredictable. And I did it, planting the gun on Vicentè's forehead as he stilled in his seat.
The fear which I noticed before was doubled up as he squirmed, gulping loud for us to hear. I leaned closer, my eyes showing him exactly how dark they were and sneered, "I hope you love your life more than this house of yours, right? Of course you do."
He nodded and I smirked in satisfaction, "So listen to me carefully, Mr. Jorge, I did not come here to stay forever. Let us stay here for some time, we will pay as much as you want and you will do as you're told. Now will you take us to the man whom you call a 'king' or wish to be buried six feet under the ground without any last wish? And Don't think I'm incapable of doing that, I was involved in black marketing last year."
Obviously, I was messing with him. This old man was not smart enough to recognise that I was just a twenty-one year old woman, who wanted nothing more than just a worth in her life after a revenge which could change my life.
I wouldn't dare lay a finger on him or even think about taking anyone's life because somewhere in this world, every human used to be a kid who was unaware of the world he's living in, and they had someone who cared for them.
Vicentè looked away, clearly appalled from the change of events and since his shoulders slumped in defeat, I knew I was about to face the most important phase of my living time.
And I would be a coward to say I was not prepared for this.
But Ava Knights wasn't a coward anymore.
•••
The dawn has clouded the sky. Rome was beautiful as it kept surprising me with it's unusual changes. The sky was a canvas of purple, blue and black, something that wasn't common. May be it was a demonstration of the kind of darkness the people carried within themselves in this place.
Maybe it was the Mafia's sins they were suffering.
The car ride was taking too long to my patience. And when it stopped, I didn't know where the hell Vicentè brought us. We stepped out of the car, following closely behind Vicentè as he paused in front of a bouncer, talking with him in hushed voice.
I had to fight the urge to roll my eyes at his dumbness, now why the fūck would I want here his shıt? I just wanted to find that man wherever he was.
I heard Drake muttering, "Ava, I don't think this is a good idea. God, look at the way that douche is staring at us, it seems like they are going to kick us away."
I turned and smiled, funny how Drake was able to joke at this moment. "You're the son of Diana Collins—a ruthless businesswoman who has stomped on anyone and everyone on her way to the top. And you're afraid of these bodyguards?"
"Shut up, that has nothing to do with this. This is not England, it's Italy. I don't belong here, we don't belong here—"
Suddenly, a deep and huge voice interrupted us, making Drake to stop mid-sentence while constantly reminding me of what he said that I didn't belong here.
One of the bouncers towered over us and asked, "Dov'è la tua identificazione?"
I should have taken Italian classes in my school.
My face twisted in a doubtful gesture, "Um..Yes?"
The man pressed his lips thoughtfully and asked, "Not Italian?"
I shook my head and he left us, disappearing inside the club house. Drake spun me around again and said, "I think he was asking about the coat which Mr. Jorge told—"
"Hey, put this," the man called out and threw two bags on our direction. We caught it quickly before it could fall from our hold. He folded his hands against his chest and eyed us with a hard look. As if on cue, Drake tore open the bag and pulled out a jacket from the inside, stifling a laugh under his breath.
I looked back at the man with sheepish face, taking out mine and shrugged on it. For me, it was a little bigger but I couldn't care enough. The man was still staring us and I was desperately trying to spot Vicentè after him.
"Go away now," The bouncer barked and I frowned, obviously taken aback. I pointed to the club and asked, "But we—"
Out of nowhere, Vicentè appeared with a bright smile on his face and talked to the man in Italian. "Ciao, sono con me."
He showed something to him and the man waved his hand dismissively, replying in Italian, "Non posso permettere non italiani, è un ordine rigoroso. Non disturbarmi ora, portali via con te. Non li lascerò entrare nel club."
Vicentè grew irritated, "Oh! sono qui per niente. La ragazza proprio lì," he pointed at me and continued, "è venuta a guadagnare, ballerà per la notte. L'ho scelta tra le altre e mi fido di me, è la migliore!"
Whatever he had said, seemed to be working on that man, because as he regarded with an appreciating look to which I grimaced, he looked satisfied. It only left me bewildered when he lead us the way inside the huge club, I was hit by a wave of alcohol scent.
The place reeked of drugs and alcohol. Coloured in red and black with dazzling lights enhancing the walls, anyone could tell the filthiness surrounded here. From the slow music playing in the background to the men emanating a powerful and dark air, it could be called as a perfect place fit to lose yourself.
Where you couldn't find yourself once again.
My thoughts were desolated when I felt two strong hands taking a hold on my arms and I started to struggled, looking at the two giant like men with wide eyes. They were taking me somewhere, I didn't know where and why but I didn't stop screaming.
"Let me go!" I yelled, hearing Drake from behind me, finding him being strangled to the ground by the other men. Drake was wheezing, trying to punch or kick them but he couldn't. It was happening so fast. My heart was at the edge of breaking out of my rib cage, fear escalating through me.
My efforts were in vain and I stopped attempting when a strange scent hit my nostrils. That was when I realised that it was all done by the one who brought us here. He tricked us, I should have fūcking known that Aaron was not going to be here, Vicentè had it all planned for getting rid of us while he was talking to the bouncer in Italian.
I should have believed when Dad told me 'Never trust an Italian'. I regretted the decision of not bringing the gun here. I didn't know if I was more angry at that old man or at myself for my stupidity but darkness enveloped me, blurring the faint sight of the ceiling.
Vicentè fūcking Jorge was going to regret this.
•••
I wake up in a jolt as I felt water being splashed on my face. I rubbed my eyes furiously, breathing hard from the slight blockage of air, blinking several times to take in the surrounding I was.
A pretty woman stood in front of me, a hand pressed up to her forehead which was creased in worry. She was short with blond hair that fell below her waist but she looked in her mid thirtys'.
"My name is Lili, now stop staring at me like that. We don't have time now, wear this and get dolled up! We can't keep the men waiting." Her accent was thick as she told me, handing me a red garment and widening her eyes at me.
My head felt heavy and I was only confused at what she said. She huffed a long breath and her charged towards the jacket which I wore, trying to take it off. When I retreated, she rolled her eyes.
She sat down beside me with a soft look and said, "I know this must be new for you. But you signed this for yourself. The guards left you here telling that you wanted to dance--"
"No!" I snapped, pulling the jacket further around me, "I didn't say anything like that! I swear, please let me go. I just came here for someone and out of nowhere they--"
Lili's eyebrows pulled in as she asked, "You did not?"
I shook my head. It felt like I was going to be sick. There were women everywhere. A huge, low lit up room filled with girls, dressing up, getting ready, barely covering themselves. They were half naked, probably for pleasing to whoever the hell they were going to.
For a second, Lili's demeanour completely changed. She took my hand and gave it a little squeeze, as if trying to console me. "I wish I could help you, amore, But I can not. Once you step in this dungeon, you can never go back. Even I did not want to be here but I got used to this. sono così dispiaciuto, I'm sorry."
I had no idea why fate was playing with me in so many fūcked up places where I would rather chose to die. I looked at the other girls for few seconds who were now staring at me, my heart pained to the edge of losing my sanity.
And when Lili pleaded me with her guilty eyes saying, "Per favore, amore."
I didn't know what she meant, but tears brimmed the corner of my eyes and I, once again, didn't let them out. I decided to go for what God has written for me and right now, it was to perform in front of the men.
And I had no choice but give my body for them to please.
I walked closely behind the girls, wearing a red two piece, the chill air erupting goosebumps on my bare skin. Lili did my makeup and hair as I insisted on keeping it as less as she could. I was all red, from my lipstick to my high heels. They gave us a matching mask to keep ourselves from revealing.
I couldn't find myself to take in the room while I kept thinking about Drake. I hope he was safe and I prayed that they did not kill him. The slight chattering in the room stopped as we stood on the stage, my nails digging into my palm in anxiety. I thanked the God that I wasn't chosen to perform at the centre but I could still feel their eyes burning holes on my skin.
The scrutiny I was under, was beyond agitating. I have been placed in this situation before, when I was taken away from my family, for the sole purpose of revenge from my father. The paparazzi and gossips were unmanageable.
But this, this was to a whole new level. People weren't staring at me for my pictures and answers. They were ogling, eye-fūcking to be exact, their filthy eyes and thoughts crawling on my exposed skin; mostly on my intimate parts.
It had everything in me to not run and scream from utter disgust, but I did not. I calmed myself that I would escape after this fūcking ends. I wouldn't dare to stay here for even a second. From the corner of my eyes, I found Lili looking at me, concerned and worried.
[A/N: Play the song now]
I swallowed, looking away as the music started, freeing the crucial fist of my hand and wrapping them around the pole beside me.
There was no way I could be able to pole dance but I knew I didn't have any choice. I had to do it in one way or the other. The lights started to go off but I stood frozen to my position, my body not allowing me to move an inch. I kept my eyes downcast, started to hear cheers from the men in front of me.
All the girls were dancing but I didn't. My lips started to tremble in pure hatred, my mind wandering towards him. My eyes looked up, searching through several men, travelling everywhere, anywhere to find at least a trace of him.
But he wasn't here.
My hope fell again, he crushed my hopes again.
With that thought, I tightened my hold on the pole, it's chillness biting palm as I started to move my body. I didn't know what I was doing, I was gone numb and I didn't have any control on my body anymore. And that was how I liked it, nothing in my control and just surviving the moment.
I moved my hips gracefully, dragging my body down the metal before pulling myself up again, running my hands all over body sexily. With every move, I was breaking more and more.
My eyes were emotionless and my face was passive. Some girls started to climb down the stage, heading towards the men. Some were sitting on their laps and some kneeled between the legs. I closed my eyes in disgust, resisting the urge to vomit in between the time. I didn't know how long we danced like this, because suddenly, a scream rang throughout the room and the music ceased.
I flinched, breathing hard, trying to regain what has happened. I spotted one of the girls lying on her stomach with blood flowing from her arm. I gasped in horror, my nerves kicking in as I instantly started to run towards her, pushing away everyone who stood on my way.
With shaky hands, I tried to pull her with me, troubled to find any pulses. And when I found one, relief washed over my senses as I continued to make her stand against me. I didn't care if I was currently being the centre of attraction or the fact that everyone were literally gasping in dismay, because her life was more than anything else.
If anything, if anything has happened to Drake, at least I would be forgiven for saving this girl's life.
I heard a whimper against my ear as I hook her hand around my shoulder, taking her with me. "Please keep breathing," I told her and moved away from the men.
"What the fūck do you think you are doing?" A voice resonated through the walls and but I ignored it and kept taking undefined steps. For someone as short as her, she was too heavy for her sake, it was as if I was being crushed under something.
Suddenly I was whipped around, making the girl to fall on the ground with a thud and she screamed with the pain that rushed her body. I didn't look at the person who nearly tripped, instead I reached for her again, clenching my jaw and keeping my anger at bay.
As I went for her, I felt a hard kick right on my ribs which I had me falling down, the immensity was unfathomable. My eyes fell on the several bottles placed on the bar counter and I knew what I was going to do. My eyes wandered across the room, pleading, asking for help; anyone or someone but it was like they were rooted to their place. Nobody was willing to step in between and at that moment, I truly believed.
Never trust an Italian.
With as much of strength I could have, I stood up and pulled the girl with me again, the agonising pain increasing to the point where it was leaving me dizzy.
"You're going to be okay, please don't give up. I'll save you," I whispered and headed towards the bar; grabbing a hold of one of the bottles before pulling her with me out of the room.
"What a fūcking whore!" He yelled, placing a gun against my forehead. I stopped dead in my tracks as his hand came up to yank on my hair, dragging me back.
I didn't know what came into me because I didn't think twice as I smashed the bottle on his head with so much force that I didn't realise he was shouting in pain on the ground, blood running all over his face and on the floor. I couldn't move, my eyes stayed glued to the man who was writhing in pain, my hands shaking terribly.
I sucked in short breaths, No, no! I didn't kill him, I didn't--
That was when I hear a loud, powerful voice booming throughout the place with so much intensity, It made my heart stop.
Because I recognised whom it belonged to.
•••
Love this beautiful calligraphy done by ChimmyMinSuga Don't forget to check her book for more♡
There were just so many things going on in my life but here's an update, the longest I have written so far.
Tell me what do you think?
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Love, Raaz xo