I walked back and forth in my room, as I thought about what I was going to do. I felt sparks of anxiety and sadness inside of me. I didn't want to go, but I did. I didn't want to be in that room, but I had to. I didn't want his lies, I wanted the truth. I sighed, and dropped back, to sit on my bed.
I had like an hour before I had to go, did he even remember? Probably not, but if he did? I held my head in my hands, just as I heard voices outside my room.
"Yeah, he pretty much like... kicked me out, so now I'm stuck working here" I heard her tut. I quietly moved over to the door, and listened. "What even happened though?" The other woman asked. There was silence for a few seconds, "Like nothing, I just went in and tried to like... seduce? Or well, at least try and make him kiss me. It didnt work though, one of his bitch ass saviours walked in," she sighed, "then I let go, and he called after her, after he gave me a horrible look... blah blah, then he pretty much had fire in his eyes. He was so pissed off! He told me to leave, and now I'm here pretty much" "oh my god, Amber seriously?!" She hummed. "Honestly, Sherry, it's so shitty here..." and the voices trailed off.
I was in so much shock, and disbelief. 'What have I just done?' I thought to myself, over and over again. I felt my eyes prick, but I didn't let myself cry. I was tried of it. I was tired of the amount of times I cried recently, and I didn't want that number to increase. So, I took a deep breath in and decided to wear something more comfortable - to help me relax.
I put on a red sleeping dress on, that wasn't completely lace. I found it in the wardrobe and decided to put it on; it reminded me of way back then. I layed on my bed, and took a deep breath; telling myself to remember to change before I leave. I shut my eyes, and let my thoughts and memories run wild.
Time Skip
Knock Knock. The loud knocking at my door, woke me up. I got up, and rubbed my eyes. I sleepily yawned as I opened the door. "Yeah?" I said, my eyes half closed. They coughed, making me raise my eyebrows and look at their face. "Wait-" I looked back, at the clock, "9:18pm...? Oh my god! I... I- fell asleep- I-" I paused and blinked blankly at him.
"Do you want to come in?" I asked, awkwardly. I moved out of the way, so he could get past; then shut the door. I then noticed he wouldn't look at me. I furrowed my brows, and touched my face and looked down. My eyes widened, "I didn't- realise! Sorry" I looked down in embarrassment.
He cleared his throat, "It's okay, just not how I thought this chat would go really" "yeah..." I agreed with him. We stood around, awkwardly and silently. I tried to make conversation, but it didn't work.
Then I remembered, I heard what... Sherry and Amber were saying. I felt my heart drop in guilt, more so since he was infront of me. I sighed, "I'm sorry, Negan" He hummed, and raised an eyebrow at me. "I heard Amber? Go past with some lady Sherry... they were talking about what happened- I..." I felt guilty goosebumps run over my body.
"I'm sorry- but the way it looked to me, from my view- there- there was no other way to have seen in," I gulped, feeling the tears. I hated blaming someone when I was wrong - but I had just gone and done that. When I looked up at him, he seemed a bit taken back. "Wait what? You-?" He stuttered. "I heard everything from her while she was walking by- I... I'm sorry" I closed my eyes, hung my head low, and frowned.
"It's alright-" "No it's not, I hate it when I do this-" He interrupted me with a hug. My breath was caught in my throat, as he put his arms around me and his chest was close to my head. I put my forehead on his chest and sighed. I felt him put his head down, and rest his chin on my head. "I can understand why you were angry though, Y/N... I'm sorry too, I should have been more forceful when trying to get her off" he said softly. I shook my head slightly, "it's okay... I told you to keep them anyway, I should've just delt with it properly" I admitted.
"You can't help being jealous, it's alright, doll-" "J-Jealous?!" I looked up at him, and he nodded. "Because you wanted to get with all this," he said, gesturing to himself. I grinned, still a little sadly, "I hate you" "I hate you too" He smiled.