Lindsay's P.O.V.
The day of the funeral was the saddest day of my life.
Everyone was still in shock and couldn't believe he was actually gone.
And what made it even sadder was River's kids.
Cassidy had to comfort Meadow throughout the entire thing.
Kaiser just stared blankly at the casket the whole time.
Jenna was too hysterical to even show up.
Rome and Grayson were in too much disbelief to cry and Rome refused to even go up to the casket.
Logan, who was hurting so much as well, had to comfort Elise who'd been a wreck all day.
But Cassidy stayed strong for her kids the entire time. I could see it in her eyes though that she was so close to breaking down.
As they were getting ready to close the casket there came a sudden outburst.
"NO!" Rome yelled, as he jumped out of his seat and ran towards the casket, tears streaming down his face. This was the first time I'd ever seen him cry. "He's not dead just give him time!!!!" He grabbed River's hand and I bursted into tears along with numerous others.
Legend and Elliott grabbed Rome , attempting to make him let go of his dad's hand.
"You've gotta let go buddy." Legend insisted.
"No!" Roman yelled again. "My dad's not dead! He's not dead! He can't be! Just please give him more time he'll wake up! He'll wake up I swear!"
Legend suddenly let go of Rome then dropped down to his knees and started crying.
Sehrem jumped up and ran to help Elliott get ahold of Rome as Journey ran to her brother, comforting him as he bawled his eyes out.
"No! Let me go! Please just give him time!" Rome cried as his tearful eyes looked straight at Cassidy. "Mom please! Dont let them do this! Dont let them take him!"
"Roman he's gone." Cass said as her voice slightly broke while she attempted to hold back tears.
"No he's not! You're giving up on him! You're giving up!!"
At that point every single person in the building were either teary eyed or just flat out bawling.
Rome managed to escape from Sehrem and Elliott's grip then took off running outside.
Grayson then jumped up and ran after him.
I looked over at Cass and saw that she was slightly shaking with her eyes closed as Kaiser tightly held onto her hand as if to comfort her.
This was all just so insane.
...
The climax of the funeral didn't happen until afterwards when Max finally showed up.
"Max you're late." I said to him. "Everyone's about to leave to go to the cemetery."
"Then I'm not late." He said with a small chuckle as he kissed me. That's when I smelled the alcohol on his breath.
"Have you been drinking?" I asked.
"No i haven't been drinking.... Well- Okay... Maybe a little."
"Wait you're not drunk are you?"
"Juuuust a little." He stated.
"Maxwell why would you show up drunk?"
"You really thought I was gonna show up to my brother's funeral sober? No way. No no no. Now where is he?"
"Max I dont think you should-"
"Dont tell me whatever it is you're gonna say. Just- just tell me where he is.. That's aaall I wanna know. You know what, I'll find him myself since you're being a jerk."
He made his way into the building and bumped into Cassidy.
"Oh you came." She said. "I didn't think you would."
"Hi piccola." He replied with a smile. "Where's River?"
Cass looked at me in confusion.
"He's drunk." I said.
"Max how about we go outside for a bit." Cassidy suggested.
"Not until I find River."
"Why do you wanna find River?"
"You guys aren't burying him alone. You can't do that. I'm just gonna go with him."
"Max we are not burying you with River." I replied.
"That's reeeeeally not your call."
Cass grabbed his arm and tried to casually lead him outside but he yanked his arm away.
"Max come on!" She demanded.
"No I've made up my mind. I'm getting buried today. Its not like I'm gonna be much help after today anyways."
"Max you have kids to take care of." I reminded him.
"They'll be better off without me. I'm just worthless now."
"So you're just gonna throw yourself into the casket with River?" Asked Cass.
"Exactly now where is he?"
"What's going on?" Asked Mathias as he and Blue walked up.
"Apparently Max wants to be buried alive." I said in annoyance.
"Are you drunk?" Blue asked him.
"Oh my god I just wanna go!" Max yelled, getting frustrated.
"Why?" Asked Mathias.
"Because I can't do this alone!" He snapped, getting emotional as his eyes became tear filled. "I can't do this alone.... River was the only person keeping me sane because he'd been through the same struggle I have and I didn't feel alone in this world. But now that's exactly what I am.... Alone."
"Max you're not alone." Said Cassidy.
"You don't understand. No one does. And the only person that did is dead now because I wasn't there to help him. I let him go in that building alone.... I was gonna go with him but he told me not to. He told me to make sure everyone else was safe. And that's what I did but he ended up dead because of it. I wasn't there to help him. I failed him. I promised him that I wouldn't let him die alone like I let Reese die alone. But now, because of me, they're both dead. The only people that understood. They're gone. And I'm stuck here all by myself. Wishing I was dead. Wishing like hell that it was me who was inside of that building instead of River. He didnt deserve to go out like that. He didnt deserve to die. I could have stopped him. He's DEAD because of ME. They're both dead because of ME. And I don't care what anyone says, this is my fault. This is a mistake that I'm gonna have to live with for the rest of my life.... However short that is."
He turned and started to walk out of the building.
"Max where are you going?" Asked Lindsay.
"Somewhere to put a bullet in my brain. And please, don't try to stop me."