I turned on the TV to watch one of my favorite shows tonight, The Good Wife, but it wasn’t on because the Country Music Awards were on so I watched part of them instead and I saw this song “On Your Side of the Bed”by Little Big Town and it inspired me to write this next chapter. I’ve been struggling trying to get into the zone to write the next chapter.
I know there are many Bollywood references in this book, but I was raised in the South so I have an appreciation for a good country song. You’ll see another Country song or two in future chapters so stay tuned.
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Anjali’s POV con’t.
After watching the sunset, I headed inside and found a spot near one of the fireplaces to sit at because I wasn’t ready to go upstairs. I don’t know why, I didn’t want to be by myself just yet. One of the waiters walked by me and asked me if I would like something and before I knew it I ordered a scotch. I don’t really like scotch, it’s Alex’ drink. Before I could change my mind the waiter had written down the order and walked away. Why did I just order a scotch? What did I think ordering his drink of choice would bring us back together? Or maybe it would give me the illusion that he was with me.
The waiter brought me my scotch and I looked at it for a while before finally taking a small sip. Nope, I still don’t like tasting it, but I love the smell of it. The smell reminds me of Alex. I love the smell of his cologne mixed with scotch on his breath. Just thinking of it made me heat up and think of the number of times he had held me in his arms and the two smells lingered all around me. God, I missed everything about him, his laugh, his smell, and his arms around me. It had been so long since I had experienced any of that with Alex. I wondered if the new woman in his life found those same things attractive. Did he drink scotch with her? Did she drink scotch with him? My heart ached just thinking of the betrayal. The tears started to build behind my eyes again.
To keep myself from crying I tried to distract myself by looking around me and find something entertaining that would take my mind off of Alex. I looked around the lounge area and I mainly saw couples of all ages, some young, some old, and some like Alex and I in the middle of it – neither old nor young. I wonder what their stories were – were their lives simple or complicated. All of the couples were speaking softly so I couldn’t eavesdrop and listen in on their conversations. When Alex and I had been married for a couple of years and we hadn’t yet had kids we would love to go to dinner and look at all of the couples around us and guess what their story was. We would identify the couples that were on their first date and try and guess if they would make it to the second date. We would make up stories based on tidbits we could hear. We would of course chat in Hindi, since most people around us couldn’t understand us. That way we could say anything without being understood. It was yet one of the things we used to do.
Suddenly, I heard lots of people laughing and I looked over to the bar area to see a group of a dozen young people enjoying Friday night drinks. They looked like they were in their mid to late twenties. I stared at the group trying to figure out how well they knew each other. I wondered if they were all friends or if some of them were couples; I wondered if some of them would end up becoming a couple someday. Would they one day get married the way Alex and I had? Life is funny how it turns out. Watching the group of friends socialize and relax at the end of the week reminded me how many times I had met up with my friends at a bar or a restaurant. Alex and I had been friends first and I never would have guessed that someday we would fall in love, get married and have two children together. Even after I slept with him for the first time, I had assumed it had been one of those shit happens incidents between friends.
But after I snuck out from his apartment, I knew it was a matter of time before we would run into each other. It was only three or four days after that night that all of us got together at our favorite bar for Ali’s birthday. I didn’t think I would see Alex that night because I had heard that he was traveling. I got lucky and found an empty stool at the bar and grabbed it while I ordered a vodka tonic. While I was waiting for my drink, I felt someone slide up behind me and the next thing I knew the person’s lips were near my ear. But just as quickly, I got a whiff of the cologne and the scotch and I knew it was Alex before he even spoke. His scent in all of these years hasn’t changed. Even then I recognized it immediately.
“Did you have an early morning yoga class on Sunday?” he asked with constraint.
“No.” I replied.
“A dance workshop?”
“No.”
“A family emergency?”
“No.” I replied again.
He twirled the stool around to face him and asked, “Then why did I wake up to an empty bed?”
I gulped and then started babbling, “Because I snuck out. Alex, I don’t do these types of things. I’ve never had a one night stand. I don’t even know what you’re supposed to do. I know this is probably no big deal for you. I know I’m not your type, so I know whatever happened was just because of the alcohol. And, I really didn’t want to wait and have one of those awkward conversations about how things happening between friends and that we should just put it past us and pretend it didn’t happen. I’m not expecting anything from you and I’m okay with what happened. I’m a big girl and I could have stopped it if I wanted to so I’m not blaming you or anything like that. I’m sorry; I just don’t know what you’re supposed to do in these situations. ”
I looked at him and neither of us spoke for what seemed like an eternity. Finally he said, “I wouldn’t have slept with you if I didn’t want you to stay the night. Where the hell do you get this shit from? Some stupid girly magazine? Next time why don’t you ask the person directly rather than basing your decision on some article you read from some anonymous advice columnist.”
He paused when the bartender placed my drink on the counter. He paid for my drink and then turned to me, “I’m not sure why you think you’re not my type, I think Saturday night proved otherwise. I’m pretty sure we both mutually enjoyed our night together.”
The bouncer came by and tapped Alex on the shoulder, “Hey Alex, your town car is here.” He had just stopped by for a drink before leaving on his business trip.
“Thanks, man. I’ll be right there.”
Alex turned back to me, “Contrary to what you think, I’ve never had a one night stand and I hadn’t planned on starting with you. But, looks like you’ve already decided that for both of us.”
“I’m sorry Alex, I was scared.”
“See you around.” He shook his head with a quiet anger and walked away.
I felt so crappy. Had I read it all wrong? If it wasn’t a one night stand then what was it? I grabbed my drink and walked back to my friends and tried to put on my happy face.
I spent the next day wondering what the hell happened. What do I do now? Never in a million years would I have thought Alex was interested in me. I wasn’t one of those tall leggy models who dressed perfectly and walked around with an air of sophistication. I was the girl who lived in t-shirts and jeans or yoga clothes. I barely wore make-up and sophisticated is the last word I would use to describe myself. Shit! Shit! Shit! That’s all I could say when I thought about what happened.
I wanted to have sex with Alex again, but he wasn’t the type of guy I fall for. He was too sophisticated for me. I also kept having visions of him saying the things Raj used to complain about me – can’t you dress better, why don’t you style your hair, etc. I don’t think I could go through that again. Alex, like Raj, worked in the world of finance where money, ambition, and sophistication were normal. I didn’t care for money, had little ambition, and was a simpleton. God, why did the sex have to be good? If the sex had sucked, it would have been so easy to walk away because I didn’t need another repeat of Raj. But, the sex had been incredible and I wanted to know if it was beginners luck or if it really could be good again. I walked around in a haze trying to figure out what to do, but no answers came. Answers never have come easily to me. They didn’t then and they still don’t.
Luckily, I didn’t have to make the first move. I walked into my office Friday morning and there was a huge bouquet of flowers and a box of chocolates and a note that said,
“I’m sorry about the other night. Can we start all over? Will you have dinner with me? Alex.”
I must have read the short note over at least a dozen times. What did it mean start all over? Our friendship? Sleep together again?
Not knowing what Alex’ intentions were, I sent him a quick email.
“Thanks so much for the flowers they are beautiful! The chocolates also look delicious. Anjali.”
Within minutes, I got a response. I was so surprised because Alex was in Hong Kong, and HK was twelve hours ahead meaning it was 9pm there. What the hell was he doing still sitting behind his computer?
“You’re welcome, but you didn’t answer my question. Will you have dinner with me? A.”
I sat at my keyboard, wondering what I should write. Should I have dinner with him? After re-writing the message several times I finally settled on, “Sure. When? A.” – Yes it took me five minutes to come up with that short and simple message.
A couple of minutes later, I heard the, You’ve got Mail, message and I read Alex’ response. “Does Tuesday evening work? I’ll be back by then. A.”
I responded, “I have a staff meeting until 8pm that night is that too late? A.”
Alex’ response, “No problem. Let’s meet at 8:30pm at Paulo’s Trattoria near your office. A.”
“Okay. See you Tuesday evening. A.”
Waiting for Tuesday had been torcher. I had no idea what to expect. Finally, Tuesday rolled around.
I walked into the restaurant and I immediately saw Alex sitting at the bar. He was wearing a dark suit, white button down shirt and his tie had been loosened. His hair was tousled and his long legs were dangling off the stool. He was drinking white wine instead of his usual scotch. He spotted me immediately, and stood up and walked over to me and kissed me on the cheek. “How are you?”
“I’m good. How was your trip?” I asked.
“The same as usual,” he answered as he poured me a glass of wine.
“I thought you were a scotch drinker,” I said as I looked at him quizzically.
“But, you like Chardonnay, right? So tonight I thought I’d join you. Cheers.”
“Cheers.” I didn’t know what else to say. I felt so tense and awkward. I’d had dinner with Alex so many times before, but it was never a date and I hadn’t had sex with him all of those times before. Thankfully, the waitress came over and told us our table was ready. Alex grabbed the bottle of wine and his glass and we walked to our table. Once we settled at our table I was more nervous than ever. The tables were small and intimate and every time I looked up I was so close to Alex’ face and that made me even more nervous.
The waitress handed us menus which at least gave me something to do with my nervous hands. I buried my head in the menu. I knew what I wanted, but I took longer so that I could avoid looking into Alex’ eyes. He quickly decided what he wanted and leaned back in his chair and stared at me until I decided. When I kept staring at the menu he finally said, “Do you need some help deciding? Or are you avoiding me?”
“Neither. I’m just indecisive tonight.” What he didn’t realize dinner wasn’t the only thing I was indecisive about.
When the waitress came, I quickly gave my order, “I’ll have a Caesar salad and the spinach ravioli. Thank you.”
The waitress then looked at Alex, “I’ll have the soup of the day and the rack of lamb. Thank you.” She then took away our menus. I was quiet because I really didn’t know what to say. Finally, Alex broke the silence, “I want to apologize for my behavior the other night at Ali’s party. I shouldn’t have gotten so mad at you. I realize I shouldn’t have slept with you after Katherine’s engagement party.” He paused to take a sip of wine, and my stomach turned. The thought going through my head was that he regretted sleeping with me. Great, some of the best sex I’ve had, but the guy regrets it which could mean only one thing, that it wasn’t that great for him.
“Anjali, I didn’t mean to seduce you when I brought you home. I really did have good intentions and the only thing I wanted to do was help you get sober and then take you home.” This was feeling like one of those it’s not you, it’s me speeches before you get dumped. I didn’t think that this would go anywhere, but did he really have to spell it out, because hearing it sounded awful. This is the exact reason that I snuck out and yet he was insisting we go through this speech anyway.
“I got all of this backwards. I should have asked you out before bringing you to my apartment. You deserve to be courted and treated like a lady. I’m sorry I took advantage of you and the situation. I’d like to start over. I’d like us to date if you’re interested. And, I promise to be a gentleman and I’ll keep my hands off you this time. I hope you’ll give us a chance to see if this will lead somewhere. I meant what I said Saturday night; I really have liked you for a long time.”
I sat there stunned and lifted my glass and took the biggest gulp of Chardonnay that I have ever taken. “Are you sure? You want to date me?” I asked.
“Why would I ask you on a date if I wasn’t interested?” he countered.
“Because a certain cha cha might have guilted you into this? He knows doesn’t he?” I responded.
“No Tarun cha cha didn’t put me up to this. If anything, he would rather that I not see you. I don’t think he thinks I’m good enough for you. Plus, from what I hear he has a list of guys he’s dying to introduce you to. How did you know he knows?”
“Oh. Maybe I should look through the bio-data’s before answering you.” I said teasing him and hoping to lighten the mood.
“Ouch. Maybe I should slip my bio-data in the stack. What should I write on it that will make you look at it? Really, how did you know about Tarun cha cha?”
We kept going back and forth like this and the awkwardness slowly dissipated. At the end of a long dinner Alex took me home even though I told him he didn’t need to. He dropped me off at the front of my building and kissed me goodnight. His goodnight kiss had me floating and I could barely think after that. Looks like I still liked his kisses even sober.
He broke the kiss and looked at me, “So do I get a second date?”
I lifted my droopy eyelids to look into his eyes, “Depends on where you’re taking me?”
“You’re a tough one. But, I’m not telling you. You have to trust me that you’ll enjoy it. So?”
I smiled, “Okay, I’ll give you one chance to impress me. When do I get to be surprised?”
“Friday night. I’ll come pick you up around 6pm. Dress casually.”
“Okay Friday night it is. Goodnight.” I said as I walked into my apartment.
And that’s how it started. Whenever he was in town we went out. Each time it was something different and no date was boring. For our first date he took me to Jackson Heights for chaat (Indian street food) and then to watch the latest Bollywood movie. It couldn’t have been a better first date since I love pani puri and it’s a no brainer my love for watching Bollywood movies. Each date was special and it was always something I liked doing. I looked forward to where he was going to take me.
But, fortunately, or unfortunately, he kept his promise and he kept his hands off of me. We would kiss and hold hands, but there was no repeat of the drunken Saturday night. I appreciated that he kept his word, but I so missed the sex.