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Pen Your Pride

I'm so excited that I met my goal of publishing 5 chapters in one week! Yeah!!! Hopefully, this makes up for my long absence.


So, this is the chapter where you find out what Alex and Anjali do - I really would appreciate your comments on their final decision - whether you like it or don't or don't know.  I'm dying to know how the chapter makes you feel.  I also must admit, I loved writing this chapter.  I wrote this chapter a while ago and I had to write the chapters in between to catch up to it so hopefully it all flows well.

Well enough of my babbling - let's get to the good stuff!

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Anjali

The final few weeks before moving to London flew by. And, the one afternoon that I'd been looking forward to had finally come. I dropped off the kids at school and let the school know that they need to be kept in aftercare since I was finalizing the details of the move and wouldn't be able to pick them up on time. It was scary how easily the lies came out of my mouth.

I walked up to the hotel that Alex had given me. It was a hidden boutique hotel on the other side of town. Cute and quiet. I walked in and looked around the cozy lobby. There were two armchairs and a small side table and just a little space in between that and the counter. There was a young man behind the counter in a suit jacket, a t-shirt and slacks.

"Ma'am, how can I help you?"

I kept my sunglasses on and my hoodie over my head and quickly answered. "I'm here to meet Amar Shergill. What room is he in?"

"What's your name?" he asked.

"Kareena Kapoor." I answered. I knew he wouldn't understand the little joke because he had no idea that Kareena Kapoor is a famous Bollywood actress.

He picked up the phone and dialed a number. "Good morning, Mr. Shergill, there's a woman named Kareena Kapoor at the front desk asking for you. Should I send her to your room?"

The gentleman hung up the phone. "He's in room 318. The elevators are to your left and the room is on the third floor."

"Thank you," I quickly said as my legs went on autopilot and walked straight to the elevator.

The ride up was short and before I knew it the door was wide open and I stared at the room signs; Rooms 300-315 to the right; Rooms 316-330 to the left.

I stood in the elevator my feet frozen. I need to walk out of the elevator and go left. That much my brain registered, but my feet wouldn't budge.

The elevator door shut on me. I watched the doors slam shut in front of my eyes, but I still stood frozen. What was I doing here? I was about to break my marriage vows.

The elevator started to move down. In moments it hit the lobby floor and the doors flung themselves open. No one was there on the other side of the door. But the doors stayed open. Yet once again my legs stood frozen. I didn't want to leave either. I didn't want to go back to my empty place. I didn't want to go back to the place Raj and I called home. The place where I felt like I had a constant headache that never went away; that dull ache in the back of my head; that feeling like I was just an actor moving through life. I treasured the few hours a week I spent with Alex; it was the only time the headache went away. It was the only time I felt real; like I was alive rather than a zombie walking through life.

If I walked out of this hotel, I'd never know what it felt like to touch Alex. I wanted to know what it would feel like to be held by someone who wanted you; who wanted to spend time with you. I so craved and needed human touch.

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