His innocent vixen

Stupid

I had been stupid to kiss Killian, what was I thinking?

I sighed as I stripped from my pyjamas, walking towards the shower as I stepped in my fingers grazing the cool metal, turning it as the warm water began to cascade over me.

My curly hair springing to life as I ran my finger through it before reaching for the shower gel, lathering my body with the cool substance as my mind kept wondering back to our kiss. It felt good, it was soft and gentle...it was tender.

I turned off the shower as I grab the towel wrapping it around my body. My feet touching the carpet before I walked towards the sink, lifting my eyes to the mirror with the golden rim as I looked into my own eyes. Memories of every single thing that Killian had done racked through my mind.

Fucking the girls in the airplane, flirting with girls at our engagement party, going on a date with Rose at our honeymoon...my heart sunk to the pit of my stomach and my eyes began to water, as I had realised how ridiculous I looked.

Here I was playing house with such a vile man, getting him breakfast, kissing his sinful lips. The memories just kept flooding my mind as I never broke the eye contact with my reflection. I knew better than to pretend everything was okay.

I had always told myself I wouldn't be like every other upper class wife, this wasn't how things were going to go. I had to start protecting myself because in my situation there was no Prince Charming or knight in shining armour...there was me and myself only.

I sighed as I grabbed my hair cream, running the banana scented substance through my wet curls; before brushing the front and back of my head before pulling my hair into a curly bun.

I smiled at my reflection but it didn't reach my eyes, I swallowed the lump in my tiny throat, grabbing my towel and drying myself off. I was always one to take care of my skin, body and face. It was time I started taking care of my heart.

Killian

She kissed me? I hadn't expected  for her to kiss me, especially after everything that has happened in such a short time.

I couldn't seem to shake the dissatisfaction I felt when I thought of my life from the moment I had said I do. I was no longer a free man...I never had been really; my mother had planned out almost every aspect of my life. Even sticking Rose in the middle of it.

I lay back on the bed as I ran my fingers through my soft hair. I had always worried about hurting Emilia the way I had hurt here many years ago at her parents annual ball. I never wanted to see that image of her questions eyes full of hurt upon me, the look of a completely shattered soul.

So my logic was push her away while everything was still fresh and anew, so that we'd both come out of this alive, but the guilt kept eating away at me.

Flirting with girls at our engagement party, the women in the airplane, going on a date with Rose on our honeymoon, it was all to push her away before things got too complicated. I couldn't say I was in love with Emilia...because well I wasn't.

This Emilia was different people grow and their personalities changed, but I seemed to disappoint her time and time again.

My thoughts were interrupted by the bathroom door opening, I turn my head as I watch Emilia walk out of our bathroom. She was the embodiment of  innocent and sinful all in one.

A combination that was rare to find.