Bedroom Floor (Harry Styles)

Chapter 90: i don't want you

2nd September 2018

i groaned and rolled over with a massive headache— one of my biggest ones to date possibly.
i pat the bed and realise no one is in here with me. not saying i'd cheat on harry, because i wouldn't, but drinking makes you do crazy things that you'd never do sober. i was out with Perrie, Jesy and Claudimar last night and if i'm being honest. i can't remember a fucking thing.
i tear my eyes open slowly and that's when it gets more painful. i groan and tighten my eyes.

"so you're awake then?" i hear a voice. harry.
i open my eyes even slower than before and see him with his arms crossed stood up at the bedroom door.
"looks like it." i croak back to him. he nodded and walked closer to me "maybe now that you're awake you can explain this to me" he says handing me his phone. god sake. i groan grabbing the phone. i rub my eyes and look down at his phone to see a article about me.

Anastasia's steamy night out on the town with Little Mix's Jesy Nelson and Perrie Edwards, and close friend/dancer Claudimar.

Anastasia, sister of Louis Tomlinson, was spotted and papped on a night out after her huge Fusion Festival show with the legend Janet Jackson. The night out consisted of laughter, fun and plenty of drinks. Anastasia's boyfriend, heartthrob Harry Styles didn't make a appearance with the small group last night at Funky Buddha, it is not stated why. But we know that Harry will not be pleased when he realises his girlfriend has been rubbing herself up on her dancer, Claudimar. the night entailed of the girls; Perrie, Anastasia and Jesy dancing with Claudimar. Anastasia went a step further by grinding on him and wrapping her arm around his neck, sources say; 'they looked very cosy with each other— like they've had a fling before in the past? they looked very happy'
i wonder how Harry will take to this news, we can only imagine the stuff they're arguing about now.

To make things MORE AWKWARD Anastasia went out clubbing with one of her best friend's ex fiancé's, Perrie Edwards, Anastasia's brother Louis Tomlinson has pledge he and zayn fell out and it's "never really got better" between them both. but zayn and anna seem to be doing just fine in the friendship department— after writing songs together and Zayn featuring Anastasia on his hit single Entertainer. we really want to know what zayn thinks about Anna and Perrie still being so close after everything that's happened between them.

i rolled my eyes and tossed harrys phone back on the bed near my feet.
"so." he said making me look up at him.
"it's been blown way out of proportion." i stated "i can't even remember anything from last night—" i shook my head and sighed.
"did you— did you cheat on me?"

"what?!" my eyes widen as i look up at him. "did you cheat?" he asked again, his voice cracking a little.
"no. of course i didn't," i laugh softly making Harry frown at me as he sits on the end of the bed. i get to my knees and crawl over to him and straddle him "don't" he whispered looking away from me. i turn his face back to mine and his eyes open slowly, they're red, like he's forcing himself not to cry.
my heart breaks seeing him like this "you're think wayyy too much into this harry. i love you and only you. why are you letting them do this to you?"

"who? letting who do what to me?! letting you ruin me!" he snapped pushing me off him and pointing at me. i fell back on the bed as he stood up in anger. my eyes glistened with tears "h-harry why are you overreacting??"
"i'm not overrreacting. this article came out last night. i thought all night about it, should i talk to you about it? should i leave it? should i be pissed? should i be calm about it and forget it! but then i thought; no fuck it. she'd go crazy at me if i did this to her. it's not fair on me, Anastasia. not to mention you've just publicly cheated on me"

"i didn't fucking cheat! what the fuck??" i said getting you from the bed.
"it's as good as!!" he shouted at me "rubbing yourself up on your fucking dancer, what the fuck?? imagine if i started rubbing myself up on Charlotte from the live band?? fuck. you make me so angry!"

"wouldn't surprise me" i roll my eyes walking past him out of the bedroom to go to the kitchen "what the fuck does that mean??" he snapped following me making me sigh as i flick the kettle on "nothing. can you stop raising your voice?"
"no!" he snapped at me again "i don't know why you think you can keep treating me like this. i do everything i can to make you happy! i'm following you around the world on tour so we can still be together everyday! what else do you want from me!! i don't understand!" he shouted pulling at his hair. i see the anger in his eyes, yet i see something else too— i just don't know what.

"what else do i want??" i suddenly snapped "i don't know what i want. but you know what i don't want? hmm?" i asked him turning to him in fury.
his eyes narrowed at me "what don't you want?"
a tear slipped down my face as i looked into his scared eyes "i d-don't want you" i whispered. i saw him visibly choke on his breath as he looked down to the floor.
"i'm sorry." i whispered to him. i saw a tear fall down his cheek as he looked back up "is that what you really want? you want me to leave? for us to be over?" he stepped closer to me and i backed away.
"you don't trust me harry— you never have. that's the only reason you're following me around the world. it's because you don't trust me. you don't want to just be with me, i told the world i was with you— if i wanted someone else i wouldn't of wasted my time on you. i wouldn't of told the world about us." i told him truthfully. his hand reached out to grab mine, i allowed it instead of pulling away.
"please Stasia— you know i love you. i just wanted to be with you. i know i get a little jealous but i do trust you— i promise, i do" he begged.
i laughed shaking my head at him "you don't trust me at all harry," i wipe these tear away from my face "you wouldn't of asked if i cheated on you if you truly trusted me"

"it was just in the heat of the moment— of course you wouldn't cheat on me" he laughed softly. i looked back at him and the tears fell slowly down his face with no control.

"i still stand by what i said." i say pulling my hand out of his grasp. "i think you should leave"
he laughed wiping his tears away "are you being serious? you really don't want me?"
i closed my eyes and breathed. of course i want you, i thought.
before i could answer him with the truth he spat the most horrible thing in my face; "it's cool. i never really loved you anyway. this was all apart of the plan, i got some good promo out of it— so thank you, but no thanks" he snapped turning his back to me and walking towards my bedroom. i'm guessing to collect his stuff so he can leave mine and go back to his.
i broke down in tears once he was out of sight, i fell to the floor and sobbed quietly in my hands.
after minutes of sobbing i heard harry coming back from the bedroom. i looked up and our eyes met, his eyes was red raw and tears was falling from them. he looked away and walked to the front door, leaving and slamming it behind him without a word.
i sob even harder and get to my knees so i can grab my phone from the breakfast bar.

i typed out a message.

i need you.

minutes later he replied.
louis xxx: i'm on my way. x

i put my phone on the breakfast bar and cried so hard.
around 20-30 minutes later my front door opened and closed "stasia??" i heard my brother say. i sobbed even harder, his voice is just so soothing. i'm so glad he's here. "oh anna what's happened??" i heard his voice, then his arms immediately wrapped around me as he sat on the floor next to me.
i cried into his neck as he rubbed my back and my leg "it's okay i'm here— i'm here love"
i put my arm around his neck and cuddled into him "where's harry??" he asked and i cried harder hearing his name and remembering the look on harrys face when he told me he never loved me.
i shook my head in louis' neck.

"come on babe, stand up" he said and he stood up, he held out his hand and i grabbed it so he could pull me up. i immediately wrapped my arms around his neck and cuddled him "are you okay??" he asked rubbing my back.

5 hours later;
"i can't believe he said that to you—" louis shook his head as he laid on the bed next to me. i was cuddled into him with his arm around me. yes we do cuddle like this. me and louis are not only siblings but we're best friends.
i wipe away my tears and sighed "i always had a feeling he didn't love me" i told Louis' truthfully.
"what? of course he loves you!! he worships the ground you walk on, he's just angry about what happened yesterday and that you said you didn't want to be with him— i mean, i know you saying that must of hurt him but damn, he didn't have to say he didn't ever love you, because we now that's a lie" louis commented rubbing my back.
i shrugged "i don't care anymore, i just want to forget"

louis sighed and nodded kissing my hair "i know— and you will. i promise." he whispered, i slowly fell to sleep in his arms.