For That Special One (Special A Fanfiction) #Wattys2014

Chapter 31-Stories Of The Past

Chapter 31-Stories Of The Past

Dedicated to @MerkelaSummers :)

NAGISA'S POV

"I think we both need to hear each other out. No matter how the outcome, we have to be honest with each other." Ryuu says once we were both finally out of the helicopter.

I looked away from him, sweeping my hair forwards to hide my face. I know we both didn't want to face rejection, but I was unsure, and so was he. If hearing him out meant we wouldn't be so troubled, I believe it would be okay. Just like Shinobu said, we were both hiding our troubled feelings for too long.

My hair is gently swept away from my face and tucked behind my ear by Ryuu's hand. I look up at him, and he gave me a small smile.

"It's not fair if you have long hair to cover your face and I don't. Somehow Shinobu knows best. We're probably feeling the same way, so don't shy away."

"Okay." I whispered, it was only for my ears, but Ryuu managed to hear it too. Smiling, he places my hand in his. I could feel my cheeks heat up, but it didn't bother me.

"I'll start first." Ryuu squeezes my hands to calm me down. Everyone, including Sakura whom I just met, dubbed us both as oblivious before Shinobu cut in and took us here. After her long rant, she dumped us in the playground we first met during our childhood days.

How she knew the exact location I have no idea, but it wasn't exactly the right time to ask about that.

This would definitely change our current friendship, I can feel it. The more I think about it, the more I can feel none of the fluttering in my stomach, just a guilty pain from the pit of my stomach. Physically it does hurt a little, contributing to the mental turmoil of emotions inside of me. To say I felt nervous was the understatement of the year.

I used to think I was an adaptable person, able to change according to whatever situation I was put in, whatever new, permanent change that would come into my life. I never even thought of a relationship so deeply to know that whatever hurt I might end up feeling emotionally would not kill me as a person, but would destroy me mentally.

I fear the rejection, all the positivity I used to convince people when they were down disappeared. There was only negativity, and I never knew I could be so affected because I feared the negative outcome from a situation everyone would only hope for the best, but things don't work that way. Couples do fall apart, some people lose the love, and it would remain one-sided and unrequited.

So what if I had known Ryuu when we were eight? It was a mere month, and I suddenly drop into his life years later to try let him know I didn't forget him. It would be dumb of me to have wishful thinking that he wouldn't move on. I've seen little in my life, but it was enough to spark all the insecurity.

My parents were the perfect couple in the business world. They found true love, and never fell out of it despite how much time they don't spend with the other. However, Aunt Alice had lost her husband to a mistress four years after Lily was born, since he fell out of love. It hurt her quite a lot, she even took a three month break. Well, not after she settled her own court case, getting not only the custody of her only child, but also a few other benefits from divorce.

The two different outcomes of my mother and my aunt made me question everything I used to believe in fairy tales, which were created with happy endings just to please children. I didn't want such a delusion to cloud my judgement, yet I don't want the fear to stop me from whatever I want in life.

If this was an obstacle in life that I had to go through, I hope what doesn't kill me would make me stronger than I used to be. I-

"Nagisa? You spaced out." Ryuu clutches both my arms and looks at me worriedly. I blink a few times before realising that I had been so deep in my thoughts I lost contact with reality. "If you don't want to do this today we can always change to another time?"