Cigarettes [Bennoda] ✔

Chapter 77

Mike's POV
That next morning, I got up and Chester wasn't in bed. I panicked of course. I was so afraid he had done something stupid and hurt himself. Chester was hard to be with sometimes because he was always so quick to do something drastic or hurt himself when things got bad, so I never knew what the hell he was going to do if he was in a down mood and his thoughts got the best of him.

I checked on Max before heading down the stairs and saw that she wasn't in her crib. That made me feel a little better in a way. I knew he wouldn't do anything he'd regret if he had Max with him. I went down the stairs and saw him sitting at the kitchen table and Max in her high chair. He was feeding her breakfast and drinking some coffee. Our relationship had been so crazy, I couldn't remember when he even started drinking coffee. He had always told me that he hated it, and would always get hot chocolate when I went anywhere to get coffee, and now he was drinking it black, no sweetener or anything. I just shrugged it off and ignored the voice in the back of my head that screamed at me for not even knowing who my husband was anymore.

Did he have a new favorite song? Movie? Was his favorite food still pizza? Did he still like to cuddle on the couch and eat out of a tub of rocky road? Did he still hate sports with every inch of his being and worship the very ground Scott Weiland walked on?

I didn't know any of that shit. We had been so busy and our lives had been so crazy, we forgot to make time with eachother and just catch up on things like that. The only time we spoke was about Max or we were arguing. This new incident wasn't going to make things better either because now he hardly wanted to talk to me and for damn sure didn't want me touching him in any way.

"Good morning, my loves." I said as I walked in the kitchen that morning. Max grinned when she saw me, and Chester just glanced over. "Morning." He said. I walked over to Max and kissed her forehead like I always did in the morning. Then walked over to Chester to give him his morning forehead kiss. I put my hand at the back of his neck and leaned down. He pulled away.

"Oh... sorry... sorry." I said, quickly moving my hand from him. He didn't say anything, just went back to feeding Max. I made myself a cup of coffee and sat at the table with him. I looked at him and saw a truly broken man in front of me. He looked like he could break down or snap at any moment. I didn't know what to do. Was this just going to be my life now? Married to a man who didn't want any interaction with me at all?

I finished my cup of coffee and then went and took a shower. After that, I got dressed and went back downstairs to find Chester washing dishes. I got a baby wipe from the box on the counter and wiped Max's face and hands off with it. Then I got her out, put her on my hip and grabbed a rag to wipe her high chair down with.

"What do you wanna do today?" I asked, just to make small talk. He just shrugged. "Can you at least talk to me? I know, things are bad right now. I know that, but I just wanna make you feel better. I can't do that if you want nothing to do with me." He sighed and turned to me from drying dishes off. "A random man took me into a dark alley and fucked me last night. Then he just left me there. I'm sorry if I'm not in the fucking mood to talk right now. I just wanna be left alone. Okay? I love you and I appreciate you being here, but leave me alone." He said. I nodded and turned away.

"I'm gonna go get Max changed and dressed if you need me." I mumbled as I walked away. I went up to Max's room and picked her out a pair of black leggings and a white Ramones band tee that obviously Chester had bought for her. Then I changed her diaper, got her dressed, went back down stairs and got her some toys to play with on the rug. I sat in the floor with her and tried not to bother Chester anymore than I had that day.

I glanced into the kitchen that was connected to the living room and saw him sitting there, elbows on the table, head in his hands. I sighed. I didn't want him to get angry with me, but I had to do something to at least lighten his mood enough to where he'd want to talk to me. He looked up and saw me staring at him. We stared into eachothers eyes for a few seconds until he looked away. I sighed again and looked at Max in front of me. She was swinging a set of play keys around.