Disdain, Agony, Hope, and Love #Wattys2020

Chapter 14

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Bingley stood in the middle of the room, an apprehensive look on his face. Darcy closed the door and waved him towards a chair. He himself remained standing, but soon began to walk around the room, unsure of how to begin. He could see that Bingley was beginning to worry, so he decided to be frank.

"Bingley my friend, how serious are you in your attachment towards Miss Jane Bennet?"

He was rewarded with a large smile

"Is that all you wanted to speak to me about? Well, I can assure you I am actually quite serious."

"Enough to make her a proposal of marriage?"

Bingley blushed but answered in the affirmative. To cover his embarrassment, he dug into his pocket and pulled out a small box. It was promptly opened and Bingley asked for Darcy's opinion.

Darcy stared at the ring. His worst fears were confirmed.

"If you did marry Miss Bennet, do you know what the you will be letting yourself in for?"

"I cannot think of what you could mean," said Bingley, rather annoyed.

"Think, man! The inferiority of her connections, the lack of propriety of her family! Can you afford to ignore them?"

Bingley half-rose from his seat. "Yes, I can!"

"No, you cannot!" Darcy calmed himself. "A man of your position cannot afford to . . . . degrade himself with such a woman, as beautiful and agreeable as she is. Her relatives - an uncle in trade in Meryton and another who lives in Cheapside."

"I do not care," said Bingley stubbornly.

"Her family! Did you not see their shocking behaviour at your own ball? In your own house!"

Bingley was silent.

"The mother, crying to the world about how a match between you and her daughter would 'throw the girls into the paths of other rich men'! The third sister, not knowing when to stop, when enough was enough. And the two youngest, chasing after the officers, flirting with them with not a single thought as to how they were exposing themselves."

"I do not care!" said Bingley. He did not look at his friend. "I love Jane and she loves me - "

"Are you sure?"

Bingley stopped and looked at Darcy.

"What do you mean?"

"In the whole of your acquaintance with her, has she ever told you that she loved you?"

"Yes! Well . . . to be specific . . . no. It was every day implied but never actually . . . said."

"I am sorry, Charles, but I must tell you. I believe that Jane does not return your affections."

"A - are you certain?"

"She has never said such to your sisters. I myself am convinced of it. I have watched her, Charles and I believe her regard for you is no more than maybe brotherly affection."

Bingley looked away, Darcy's words finally making sense to him.

"I know you care for her a great deal, my friend," said Darcy gently. "But I do not wish to see you throwing you life away on a woman who does not love you. Would you subject her to that? To be locked in a loveless marriage?"

"No . . . . "

Darcy felt extremely guilty as he saw tears welling up in his friend's eyes.But he knew what he said was true. Bingley had to know the truth.

But the truth hurt.

They stood there in silence for a while. Darcy watched sadly as his friend looked at the ring which before had held such joy for him but now held broken dreams. He could find no way to comfort him.

"I - I am sorry, Charles."

He turned and walked out of the room, leaving Bingley alone in the library.

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He closed the door, to give Bingley the privacy to shed his tears. He saw Miss Bingley and Mrs Hurst, waiting outside to hear the result. The unspoken question was clear. Darcy did not answer but nodded his head. Then he walked away from them to his study.

Darcy sat in his chair and leaned his head back. It was done. It was difficult but it was done. It had hurt him greatly to cause pain to his friend but it was necessary.

Darcy had done the best for his friend.

But if it was for the best, then why did it hurt so much?