Group Therapy

1 - Sometimes Quiet Is Violent.

"Sometimes quiet is violent."

   Car Radio ~ Twenty Øne Piløts.

° ° ° °

Funny isn't it?

How you could be drowning, on the verge of tears and everyone around you would be completely oblivious.

No one notices, not your friends, not your family, everyone you thought you knew. Nobody.

Want to know something even funnier?

When someone finally notices, it's not your friends nor your family but complete strangers.

As if we live in a world where strangers care about you more than the people whom you call your family.

I gaze out the window to my left staring at the dead, dry trees that our school never bothers to water

Everything is falling apart. Everything. And I have to just sit there and watch it do so.

"Miss Williams, would you mind answering this question for me?" mr robert, my math teacher, asks; snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Uhh sure.." l agree silently praying that this is something i know and can answer,

I look up at the equation he had written on the board and l couldn't understand a thing.

having no energy what so ever to even think; l admit to my stupidity.

"l don't know the answer."

"That's what l thought, see me after class miss williams" he sighs

Great.

The bell rings and people go running out of math class like their lives depend on it.

But, of course, I have to stay.

After everyone's out of the class and only me and mr Robert are left he calls me over to his desk.

I grab my books and walk up to him, resting my books on his fluorescent desk.

"Alright, what's up?" he asks casually.

I play dumb "What do you mean?"

"You know exactly what l mean Laynie what's going on? you haven't been yourself lately."

"Pfft now you noticed?!" l accidentally blurt out the words, immediately regretting it afterwards.

Shit, that was supposed to stay in my mind.

"What do you mean?" he asks and l again brush him off

"Nothing" l lie.

"Quit playing dumb. What's going on?" he asks once again

I sigh having no enegry what so ever to keep brushing him off

"Nothing, I've just been a bit tired lately."

"Are you sure that's all?" he asks

"Yeah." l reassure him

"Okay I don't want you to be late to your next class so off you go" he says, not buying what I had just told him but chosing to ignore it just like everyone else.

I thank him and head to my next class

gym.

I have no enegry for gym.

° ° ° °

I thank the gym teacher for sending me home because I looked sick before walking out of the school building to my mom's old blue honda civic 2009 that she kindly let me have.

I don't have my licences yet but for some reason there are never any cops on the road and I don't go over the speed limit so I'm safe, at least I hope.

I crash onto the driver's seat before slamming the door shut behind me and strapping my seat belt on before putting the keys in the ignition, starting the car and pulling out of the school parking lot.

As I pull onto the main road, I reach for the button to turn on the car radio but hastily pull my hand back when I remember that recently the car radio stopped working.

I asked my mom to change it or fix it for me and she told me she'll do it later, which if you know her, means never.

I never turned on the radio for wanting to turn on the radio, all they play is quirky justin bieber and ariana grande songs which i absoultely hate; I just could never stand the silence that fills the atmosphere when ever the radio was off.

Being left alone in silence with nothing but my own thoughts is a dangerous game to play, especially when I'm driving.

The ride from school back to my house is usually about 25 minutes since my school is pretty far from where l live, I've always enjoyed car rides though so I'm not complaining.

Then l remember Alex.

Shit.

Normally l drive him to and back from school with me since he lives only 2 blocks away from my house but today l left early without him, which means he'll have to catch a ride with someone from school, which is never fun when you don't know anyone.

But today I'm genuinely tired, so l guess I'm going to have to deal with him and the guilt later.

I unlock the front door and walk in making sure to lock it behind me before walking straight to my room, dropping my bag on the floor before sliding my black low top converse off and jumping in bed ignoring the fact that l still have my extremely uncomfortable black skinny jeans on.

Reaching out onto my nightstand for the remote, l grasp it and turn the air conditioner on, leaving the remote back in it's place and slipping under the covers.

Sleeping in jeans is a different kind of tired.