Imperfect

E L E V E N - A B I G A L E R U S S E L L

I thought in my head, would they judge me? Would they judge me for having this pink colored themed wedding? Would they judge me for not having any bridesmaids? Would they judge my fiancé for not having any groomsmen? Would they judge me because of the dress that I wore, the dress that Lawrence wanted me to wear?

The dress was hot pink, just like my fiancé's suit, but it was quite revealing and embarrassing for me.

The dress revealed my abdomen, showing my scars out for the world to see. Lawrence thought it was a good start to stop being afraid of what others thought of me. Although he was doing the right thing for me, I still thought and feared that everyone would judge me because of my scars.

But as my father calmed me down, I thought a little longer on it. Strong woman do this, I AM ONE OF THOSE STRONG WOMEN.

Doing this would make me a stronger person, it would make me stronger--strong enough to face the world and their many hatred and abhorrent comments.

I held my bouquet of roses tightly as the music began to play.

"This is about to happen," I talked out loud to myself, "this is really about to happen."

"It's all that you've always wanted, ever since you were a little girl..." my dad added on.

Before stepping a foot forward, I thought about the future of Lawrence and I; the things that would be going on in our lives.

I thought about children running around the living room, calling for their mom and dad for rescuing and protection.

  I thought about our children going to prom with their prom dates, as we took their pictures, proud at and for them.

Then, I thought about them leaving, heading off to college, we saying our goodbyes as they leave the nest to accomplish things in their own and start their own life.

And then, I thought about the old us, sitting down together, laying on each other, looking at our past, remembering the old times, until our grays thinned out and we turned into dust and flew in the sunset to watch over our future generations...

That's the future that I want for Lawrence and I. I want to live that life for us; I would want him to live that life for us as well.

I want to experience a life that I've never experienced before--and it all starts with me saying yes to the man that I love dearest to my heart, Lawrence Dilly Mullins.

I took another step forward as the music continued to play. Every step I took further, I knew I was getting stronger. Every step forward, is an accomplishment in life, and this was my accomplishment.

My father's arm was under my arm as we were in sync, taking one step at a time.

"I never thought this would happen..." I whispered to my dad as we finally walked outside.

"You didn't," he whispered back, "but I did..."

We were at aisle, we walked slow, we smiled as everyone turned their backs to look at us.

Some familiar faces, some unfamiliar faces, some happy faces, some not so happy faces, but I didn't care, I was in tears of happiness.

Not that far up front, I could see my love standing there, wiping the tears from his eyes as he saw me walk down the aisle for him, coming towards his way.

This was it, this was actually happening, I was about to be Lawrence's forever and Lawrence was about to be mine forever.

We made it to the top where the priest and Lawrence stood.

My father let go of my arm, kissing me on the cheek as he whispered, "You are perfect in my eyes..."

My face lit up, I smiled, I hugged my father quickly before he finally walked down.

I watched as he sought in front with my mother, both of them looked as if they were proud of me. I was happy that I could make them proud.

I walked up, standing across from the love of my life.

  I cried, he wiped the tears from my face.

  He also cried, and I wiped the tears from his face.

"You're welcome..." I said as I laughed and smiled at him.

"You're welcome..." he repeated what I said as he also laughed and smiled at me.

"Abigale and Lawrence," the priest began, "today you are bounded by your friends and family, all of whom have gathered here to witness your marriage and to share in the joy of this special occasion. Today, as you join yourselves in marriage, there is an infinite and indefinite future stretching out before you. The possibilities and potentials of your married life are countless; and now falls upon your shoulders, the task of choosing your values and making real your dreams. Through your commitment to each other, may you grow and nurture a love that makes both of you better people. A love that continues to give you great joy, and also a passion for living that provides you with energy and patience to face the responsibilities of life."

My heart began to quiver as I realized that this was actually happening.

"Do you Abigale," he went on, "accept Lawrence as your life mate and one true love, promising to share in all that life offers and suffers, to be there for him in times of plenty, as well as times of need, to soothe him in times of pain, and to support him in all endeavors, big and small, for as long as you both shall live?"

"I do..." I cried my eyes out as I continued to look at Lawrence.

"Now Lawrence," the priest repeated himself, "do you accept Abigale as your life mate and one true love, promising to share in all that life offers and suffers, to be there for him in times of plenty, as well as times of need, to soothe him in times of pain, and to support him in all endeavors, big and small, for as long as you both shall live?"

"I do," he said, trying to stop from crying, "I do..."

"Let it all out," I whispered to him crying, "it's okay to cry at this moment..."

I watched as Lawrence reached inside of his pocket, handing his ring to me and keeping my ring.

"Why didn't they have bridesmaids and groomsmen?" someone from the audience whispered, but I ignored it, not really caring what anyone had to say about MY moment and MY wedding.

"I, Lawrence Mullins," my lovely man said as he held my hand tightly, "give you this ring to show my infinite promise to you for the rest of our lives. I show my infinite love for you until our eyes are closed forever and our breaths are silent."

I smiled, "I will forever wear this ring as a sign of my commitment and the desire of my heart..."

He put the ring on my finger, I began to shake, but I kept my composer.

"I, Abigale Mullins," I began crying, really emotional, "give you this ring to keep for eternity, until we are no longer existent, until our love die with us--until... forever."

I placed the ring on his finger as he responded, "I will forever wear this ring as a sign of my commitment and desire of my heart..."

"And now," the priest continued, "by the power vested in me by the State of Georgia, I hereby pronounce you husband and wife. Lawrence, you may kiss the bride."

Lawrence grabbed me quickly, looking into my eyes.

"You're so imperfect," he said with a charming and cute smile, "that's why I love you so much..."

He kissed me, there was a spark, a spark that would last for a lifetime.

I wrapped my hands on his head as the kiss continued. The guests stood up from their seats and began applauding us on our marriage.

Not caring about the roses any longer, I threw them in the air, not looking at who caught it. The only thing that I heard was a woman scream out, "I GOT IT, I ACTUALLY GOT IT!"