Zane didn't know how to love.
Ever since he could remember, he had been neglected by his family. He was always the shadow of his older brother, even his younger half related brother. No one wanted to be his friend, and anyone who got close to the emotionless boy hurt him in multiple ways. He grew up as an outcast, with no one to love him and vice versa.
He had been frozen to the core, ignoring everyone in his life. He didn't see why he needed to care for them if they didn't care for him. He still remembered when his older brother cared, when things weren't as bad as they were now. It seemed like a million lifetimes ago to him, but it had only happened a few years back.
He had dated people before, hoping that the holes in his heart and soul could be filled by their love. But there was no love they could give, only more suffering and holes. Some of them had tried to love him in the way he desired, but they could never get it right, and ultimately believed he would be better off with someone else.
Zane went to the back of the bus, ignoring the remarks and looks of the other students on the bus. He always got the same stares and words every day, and it just didn't have any effect on him now. He had been turned completely numb, only able to feel his own sorrow and self hatred. Only able to feel the disappointment radiate from his family and teachers, and anyone else he met. He could no longer feel pain, his nerve endings frayed and dead. Nothing ever hurt physically anymore, just emotionally.
Putting his headphones in his ears, he opened up his music app. Swiping his thumb across the screen, he came to one of the songs that he felt truly explained him. It was called How Do You Love Someone.
Mommy never told me how to love,
Daddy never taught how to feel,
Mommy never told me how to touch,
Daddy never showed me how to heal!
Mommy never set a good example,
Daddy never held momma's hand,
Mommy found everything hard to handle,
Daddy never stood up like a man!
As he hummed along to the lyrics of the song, he turned his head to look out the window. He may have turned up the volume to full blast, but he didn't care anymore. That was one of the issues with the world nowadays, no one cared. Those who cared too much were treated like trash, like the filth they dumped onto the land they lived off of.
"How do you love someone...?"
~~~~
Classes went by slow, as usual.
Zane honestly didn't understand why they needed education or anything, really. Humans, Werewolves, Meif'was, and Witches were all animals-- mammals, to be exact. Yes, they were some of the most intelligent creatures, but that was no excuse for them to destroy and transform everything that gave them their beginning. They should have stuck to their animalistic origins.
Did the first human immediately start piecing things together like how to create buildings? Was the Earth covered in roads and waste when the first human was created? No. (You know, this is stuff I remind myself of every day. Such a shame that no one will listen.)
"Zane Ro'Meave!" The teacher shouted from the front of the classroom, the students turned around in their seats to look at him.
"What do you want?" Zane asked, letting out a heavy sigh.
"First of all, lose that attitude!" The teacher yelled, already grabbing a detention slip. "Second of all, we don't have our heads down during class! Now bring your phone up here and get your detention slip!"
"Why do I need to bring my phone up?" He asked, as he hadn't even had the cellular device out.
"No one just stares down at their crotch and smiles!" She sighed heavily, rolling her eyes.
"Gene does." He said with a shrug, making the others gasp. "What? When you get a boner, it's for a good reason."
"Just get your detention slip already!" She yelled at him, and some of the students sank a bit in their seats. "And give me your phone!"
"Uh... no." He stated, watching emotionlessly as the teacher's face turned red.
~~~~
The office was a boring place to be.
First of all, there was nothing to do. His phone had been taken from him, and he was just sitting there all by himself.
The door to the office opened, and in stepped Gene. He was someone that Zane had set his eye on, but knew that he would never be good enough for him. He had seen the way Gene treated his crushes and brother, with such pure love and affection that it scared Zane.
"Hey." Gene said, sitting down next to him.
Zane looked at him, blinking. Had Gene just said hi to him? Zane Ro'Meave, the one who was always forgotten and neglected?
"Hey..." Zane whispered in a low voice, making Gene give him a sideways glance.
"You seem a bit thin... don't you eat?" He asked, lightly poking at his sides.
"Not much..." He shrugged, tensing as Gene's hands went down to his wrists.
"And these... don't they hurt?" He asked, tracing his finger along the scars.
"I can't feel anything physically." He admitted, looking away.
"Wait... I know you.." He trailed off, finally realizing who it was. "Zane!?"
"Guess you feel like you need an exorcism now.." He sighed heavily, but was soon hugged close.
"Oh sweet Divines, kid..." Gene sighed, stroking his head. "You have everyone worried about you, you know?"
"Oh, please." Zane groaned, but couldn't help but feel safe in Gene's arms.
"You're so different from your brothers... why is that?" He asked, lifting his chin up.
"I can't love." He admitted, winching as Gene looked a him.
"I'll teach you to love." Gene told him. "How to love others, everything, and most importantly... yourself."
Zane let himself relax, finally feeling safe and free in his arms.
Maybe now things would get better.
