That Stupid List (A Seventeen Fanfic)

Chapter 72: A Spark

Mrs. Choi had to leave that night to the airport, and so Vernon had to say goodbye. Although he tried very hard not to cry, he failed. He cried, and eventually let loose and even sobbed. Jin felt like she was intruding watching this scene unfold before her.

After many minutes of Vernon crying on his mother's shoulder and promising he would visit her over the summer and that he would call her everyday, it came Jin's turn to say goodbye.

Although Jin did not really know this woman, she also shed tears as she hugged her. Something about her suddenly felt so familiar, and it really did feel like JIn was saying goodbye to a mother.

Jin wondered if she would ever see Mrs. Choi again. Probably not. It was saddening to think so.

Vernon's mother kissed Jin's forehead and wished her the best. After one final embrace from Vernon, they finally parted, and Mrs. Choi was off in the hospital van to the airport.

Vernon was still crying. He didn't even hide it anymore from Jin. He didn't even wipe his face or try to stop. He looked so broken as he stood on the sidewalk and watched the van take his mother away. Jin really could not imagine the pain he was going through.

They walked back to the hostel quietly. It was dark out, and the streetlights were much too dim for Jin to properly make out Vernon's expression. But she heard him sniffling.

Every sniffle from him made her feel worse. She longed to do something for him, to comfort him in some way. Without really realizing, she reached out and took his hand in hers. She couldn't tell his reaction, but she could feel that he opened his hand for her and wrapped it tightly around her own. They walked in the darkness, hand in hand, silently.

It was only when they entered the room that Vernon let go of her hand and went into the bathroom. Jin could hear him washing his face and blowing his nose from inside.

Jin wished she could be to him what Seungcheol had been, a confidant, a person with whom he can talk without feeling embarrassed, without feeling his pride was at stake. Vernon now needed Seungcheol more than ever, and so this must have been doubly painful for him.

He came out a few minutes later in his pajamas. His eyes looked tired and puffy and his nose was red. Jin was glad to see that he had at least stopped crying.

He took a seat on the bed, his back to her as he just sat there for a quiet moment. Jin did not know how to act, but she figured she should do something.

She hesitantly approached him and took a seat beside him. "Cheer up," she said to him.

"Nothing can cheer me up now, unfortunately," Vernon replied with a shrug. His voice was scratchy, and the smile he attempted to give did not come through at all.

Jin drew closer to him and sat so that she was right beside him. Out of habit, she leaned in closer and kissed his cheek. She always remembered seeing a hint of a smile on his face whenever she did that, and this time was no different.

"Okay, maybe that cheered me up just a little bit," he told her, his eyes brightening.

"I'm sorry about all the sadness that you're going through," Jin replied, "and I'm sorry if I'm contributing to it..."

Vernon looked at her with a soft yet sad look in his eyes. "Let me tell you straight out that that you arecontributing to it," Vernon told her.

It felt bad to hear him say it. "You're making me sad." That's what he was telling her with that solemn look in his eyes that drove her crazy. Was he guilt-tripping her? Because if he were, it was working.