Coffee Date // louis tomlinson

- XLI -

Next, a security guard is urging us through a standing doorway, like last time and all the times before. I go through first, no beeping. Kaia follows closely behind me. Luckily, she had no beeping either like she had last time. A look of relief and triumph washed over her when she walked away from the guard.

We take our things from the bins and leave the security area.

Now we have to go to the customs line again.

I don't think I've expressed how much I hate customs. It's not that it's hard to do or anything, but the guards that do the interview never smile. And I mean never. I have not seen one of those guards smile or even grin in all my life. Did they not grow up with any happiness in their life? Are they gone through intense training to become a security guard that scarred them so much they can't smile anymore? I don't know. Anyways, it's been my life's mission through all my travels to make one of these guards smile and it's never happened. That doesn't mean I won't keep trying, though...

The line is long as usual. While we waited, I let Kaia in on my master plan to somehow make the guard smile.

"Do you think it'll work?" she asks in a near hopeful voice.

"I hope so," I reply. "I like to consider myself a funny person, but I can not achieve the highest award of funniness until I make one of these guards smile."

"Ah," she says. "Then you must make this guard smile."

"Yes I must..." I turn my head towards the direction of the interview cubicle in which the guard is standing, looking miserable as ever while talking to another person.

A few minutes later, it's our turn to be interviewed. We step up to the counter where the guard is waiting impatiently. Kaia's hand is gripped in mine.

The guard is a man, probably in his mid-forties. His mouth is drawn in a tight line and his eyebrows are scrunched furiously, giving him insane frown lines. He has a little stubble on the bottom part of his face, not too much, but it was clear that he hadn't shaved in a few days. He was wearing his dark uniform, complete with a few pockets and a badge.

Kaia and I smiled as brightly as possible as we looked at him.

"Helloooooo," I say in a cheerful tone. The plan was for us to be so cheesy and happy, we'd make him smile. "My name is Louis, and this is Kaia, my girlfriend."

The guard looked at us, unimpressed. "Where are you two headed today?" he asks in a miserable voice.

"We're going to the London City Airport in London, England, sirrrrr," I say, dragging out the R. "That's where we live."

He rolls his eyes. "I see..." he mumbles. "Are you bringing back any alcohol?"

"Nope!" I say happily. "Wait, does it count if it's already inside of me?"

"No," he says, really annoyed with me. "Do you need to declare anything?"

"Yes!" I say, worried on the inside that my plan won't work but still grinning from ear to ear. "Do you need me to list them? Um... We got some Madame Tussaud's shirts, a mini Hollywood sign statue..."

"Not to mention all the clothes we got at the mall today," Kaia pipes in.

"Right," I nod. "We went to—"