Green Is The Warmest Color

XVIII.

I smile at her trying to ease the tension building around us. She's smiling too, a bit weak and awkward and we both know why. "I uhhh... I had fun. Your friends are fun to be with. Austin w-was also fun to be with. You.... d-didn't actually ruin the night. It's still a great night."

She holds one of my hands, tightly as ever, not wanting to ever let go. I stare at her in utter shock and astonishment that I didn't even get a chance to withdraw from her hold. "I c-can't help it... I'm s-sorry..." She puts her lips on top of my hand, leaving few little warm kisses, while her eyes are closed and I'm not even stopping her. I can't barely even move. It feels good. It feels warm. It feels great and entirely different. She lets go of my hand and cups both of my cheeks. The look from her eyes are full of lust and wander, as if she's wanted to travel into my own little world and I would do nothing but let her. The greenest green of all eyes I've ever laid mine on. She has those eyes in which you'd get lost and you couldn't ever find your way back. "I've been meaning to do this for such a long time and now... it feels like it's going to be real." I feel a large lump in my throat. I can't find my voice it's like I'm stuck in my place and I can't move my arms, my feet and I can't even speak. The tension of the moment is overpowering my strength in trying not to let this all happen for the second time around. I close my eyes as she leans closer and as much as I wouldn't want this to occur, she presses her lips against mine.

She presses her lips against mine in no time. At first, I've had not a chance to respond to her kiss because it's too eager, wanting something more and I'm left catching up. I open my eyes and I see her watching me intently as she kisses me in such deep hunger and then her lips leave mine for a moment as they go to the tip of my nose, my eyelids, basically every part of my face. I close my eyes once again and her hands roam around my body as her lips discover my own. Plump lips and needing tongue asking for an entrance and this time I can't fight it. I let myself go with it. I let myself untangle her world as we become one. She rolls and hovers over me, now being on top, she touches the hem of my shirt pulling it up to reveal some skin. "Soft... I love it." She draws more circles, infinities, earning a moan and it leaves my mouth encouraging her to continue what she has already planned. She has planned on devouring each taste of every part of my skin. She has planned on ruining me beautifully. This time, I let her. She removes my top revealing my lace bra, her eyes zooming into focus on my breasts. There happens the familiar vibration in my heart; the echoes and internal screams. She unbuttons my pants and even before she successfully removes it.

The door in my dorm opens, revealing a familiar face. Lauren.

"Hey!" I blurt out.

She smiles awkwardly. "Hey! I'm really sorry. I've been knocking for like ten minutes and no one opened the door. I noticed it was unlocked so yeah... did I uhhh wake you?" She asks clueless, innocently.

"Did you j-just come in?" I ask her looking away.

"Yes I just did. I figured you're awake and you've been listening through your earphones? I didn't even know you'd still be asleep." She answers matter-of-factly.

Don't tell me everything was really just a dream? I dreamed of Lauren. I dreamed of us basically almost having sex. I dreamed of nasty things and it involves Lauren in it. I cover my face with my bare two hands feeling like my face is looking like red apples at the moment. Lauren somehow looks puzzled but amused at the scene. I hate all of this. What's happening to me? Oh no! I'm being weird too.

Lauren squeezes one of my shoulders. "Camila, what's going on?" I distance myself away from her as far as possible and she even looks more confused as before. "Okay? Weird. What did I do?"

"Nothing!" I respond too quickly. "Why did you even come here?"

Lauren clears her throat before answering me. "Well basically I just wanted to talk about last night. I know it was rude of me to say such words to you in the rink. I apologize for that. And also---."

"I know." I cut her off and she furrows her eyebrows not understanding what I'm saying.

"You know?! What do you mean?"

"I mean it's okay. Everything is okay and you don't have anything to worry about."

She laughs lightly and continues on speaking again. "Okay. I also want to apologize the way I acted at the diner. I know it was---."

"I told you everything is okay!" She's taken aback at my sudden angry reaction. "O-okay. I understand everything and it's really okay. Stop apologizing and just go p-please."

"If there's anything bothering you, you know you can always tell me." She doesn't listen to me and even sits on top of my bed. "Did Austin hurt you?" This is wrong. Oh no! This is dejavu. This shouldn't be happening. I stand up from my uncomfortable seat and pull her away from my bed until we both reached the door.

I blink my eyes rapidly trying to realize if this is another dream or the reality. When I still see Lauren's annoyed face in front of me, I stop. "You don't need to care about me and Austin okay?! Just go, I n-need to rest." I quickly close the door not even waiting for what she has to say. I leaned on the door and feel the vibration in my heart getting slower than it was when Lauren was inside. That girl is danger and not good for my heart. I should really stop hanging around with her a bunch of times. Good thing, I still have my brilliant plan.

Austin will save me from all this mess I put myself into.

My phone vibrates and there's a text from Dinah.

D: Mila! I bought snacks. The other girls and I will go movie marathon! Gosh. I'm so excited! Prepare yourself! See you soon xx

I curl myself into a ball and stop thinking about any single thing for a moment. Oh God.