Let's Pretend My Tears Are Raindrops

Chapter 38--Let's Pretend My Tears Are Raindrops

Chapter 38

Chapter 36

     It was the second day of my trip and I knew I’d have to stop for rest soon. Derek had called me 104 times and counting. I had 57 new voicemails that I hadn’t even bothered to listen to. The only person I wanted to hear from was Mrs. O’Connor and she hadn’t even called once. I forced myself to assume that no news was good news.

     My mind was constantly erupting with thoughts and occasionally it’d get so jumbled that I’d forget my own name. The bottom line was, though, that I was making multiple sacrifices for the O’Connor family. Whenever I thought of Derek, I’d cry so hard that I had to pull over, but that was just my emotional girl hormones. That evening, I checked into a cheap hotel in the western-most part of Nebraska and knew that I’d make it to Utah the following day if I was gone by three-thirty in the morning.

     As I cried myself to asleep in the hotel, I wished I would’ve let Derek come along. With him there, life may have been a little more likeable.

    

     My plans were delayed slightly when I didn’t leave until 4:30, but I made up for the lost time by adding 10 miles to the speed limits. I came close to getting pulled over, but never did. As I drove, I surfed radio stations and as if God had been trying to talk to me, ‘When You Say Nothing At All’ came on.

     The feeling of loss was a tough one, but I was beginning to get awfully used to suffering from it.

     I was 1609 miles away from Derek, but only 50 away from Bryce. I unplugged my GPS because I knew exactly where I was headed. The streets were familiar to me, but the feeling I had was not the one I’d suspected. I’d expected myself to feel happy and secure to be back home, but instead I felt empty and alone. For the first time, my anticipation deserted me and I questioned whether or not I’d made the right choice.

     Shaking off the feeling, I straightened up and drove into the outskirts of Layton. Completely on accident, I drove past the cemetery and saw Brandon’s tombstone from the corner of my eye.

          I just kept driving, getting closer to the hospital with each mile.

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     “I’m here to ask about a patient.” I said to the lady at the front desk. “Bryce O’Connor.”

     For the first time, I realized the reality of the situation. It hadn’t sunk in until then how scared I really was for Bryce.

     “Are you Samantha Thomas?” She asked.

     “Yes.” I replied.

     “Do you have some form of ID?”

     “Yes,” I said again, pulling out my driver’s license, “I do.”

     “Alright. He’s in room 608. Take a right on the 3rd floor and it’s the eighth door on the right. He’s in the ICU so if anyone else is in there, you’ll have to wait until they’re finished.”

     “That’s fine. Thank you so much.” I said.

     “Have a nice day.” I would’ve answered, but I was already too far down the hall. I ran to the elevator and got into it. There were four other people inside of it and they all stared at me. I pressed the button for the third floor about five times and waited urgently to get to Bryce. When it finally lit up, I bolted out the door.