Maybe There's No Mistakes..

•sixty three•

I woke to an unmistakable feeling in my gut. Fuck. I tried to swallow down the sensation creeping up my throat but I know this isn't going to end well. I'm home, at least I know that. I don't remember anything past the last round of lemon drops, other than Clint falling and almost winding up in the fire, shit I'm pretty sure I remember drinking fucking Goose straight from the bottle at that point. That's never a good memory for me to have...

Fuck. I'm home. And I don't remember even getting here. God I'm such a fucking prick. She's still here though, I don't have to open my eyes to know that. Curled into my chest, her breath tickling the hollow of my neck. The warm scent of her making the nausea calm slightly. Maybe if i just stay here and stay still it will pass. I felt my stomach roll again, damn it. I'm absolutely sure this is not going to end well.

She's here with me, naked in our bed. So at least she's not Tia sleeping in the theater mad, although I would get it if she was. Why the fuck do I do this shit. We just talked about all this, I made a promise to her that I would slow down with this shit... I felt a burp bubble up and my mouth started watering. I knew I had to move, and fast before I really fucked things up.

Opening my eyes was a huge mistake, even with the curtains closed the light seeping in around the windows made my head feel like it had been split open. I didn't fall and actually crack my head open did I? Surely not. Fuck! I pulled away from her as gently as I could, trying like hell not to wake her. She grumbled in her sleep as I slipped my pillow under her arm, hoping it would keep her from stirring. I couldn't stick around to find out though.

I hit the bathroom floor just in time for an exorcism level stomach clearing. Thank god I made it to the fucking toilet, and holy fuck it's so goddamn bright in this bathroom. How does she say there is no good lighting in here? It's like I'm sitting directly on the fucking sun. My lurching stomach also isn't helping this massive head wound of a headache. At all.

I felt her come in the room before I heard or saw her. It's the strangest thing actually, the way I feel her around me, and normally it steadies me, but fuck my life, I really didn't want to wake her up. There is nothing attractive about me in the first place, but I'm certain that a grown ass man, naked, on his knees in the bathroom floor puking his literal brains out is not something anyone wants to wake up too.

I heard the clicking of the automatic blinds closing on the windows and the soft thud of her placing the remote back on the counter. The darkened room was much appreciated, but I couldn't thank her. I heard her open the linen closet and turn the tap on as another horrific spasm clinched my stomach and I was face down in the bowl again. I've never been so fucking embarrassed in my life. Why was I this way? Fuck!

I felt her fingers on my back as I lifted my head gasping for air and groaning. The cold wet wash cloth felt amazing on the back of my neck.

"Oh honey... I'm so sorry.." she said softly, her voice always felt like it was poured over me, like it was some warm magical liquid that covered me and made my whole body feel.. happy? Safe? In love? And here she is apologizing to me? For me being a dumbass? Fuck! I'm such a fucking prick.

"Don't. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have.." I started but she put her hand on my cheek and shushed me.

"Stop baby, don't talk. Just try and relax and take some deep breaths." She ran her hands through my hair and turned back to the sink, taking the now warm wash cloth with her and running under the cool tap again. She came back and crouched beside me as I laid my head down on the now closed toilet lid. She wiped my face with the cloth and draped it back on my neck. I watched her as she stood moved around the room. I could just watch her all day like some sort of fucking creep.

She was nearly naked, in nothing but a pair of black cotton Calvin thongs that made my heart rate tick up notch. She was always so naturally beautiful, like right now. Her hair a wavy, curly mess, unruly from sleep and falling in tight curls, that she absolutely hates, around her temples and ears, they are so cute though. The bandage from her new tattoo was still on her thigh and I knew it was driving her crazy. God that was a work of pure fucking beauty, I knew it would look good on her but goddamn.. I need to make sure Kyle is more than well compensated for that one. She pulled open the drawer where she keeps her medication and shook a few Advil into her palm and she placed them on the edge of the sink.