dumb love ~ jordan baker

82. goodbyes and new beginnings

I was in me and Jordan's bedroom at the beach house prepping for finals when Jamie barged in.  "Uh hey,"

"I needed to talk to you and it's urgent," Jamie rushes sitting on the bed.

"Okay relax, breathe, what's going on? You're kinda freaking me out ," I ask her.

"You're freaking out? Asher bought a ring! He's about to propose!" Jamie says.

I bring my hands up to my mouth gasping, "oh my, Jamie congratulations, oh my god," I hug her.

When I pull away I see her panicked look, "uh am I missing something?"

"I don't even know if I want to get married," Jamie admits.

"Oh uh- I mean why not? You're having his baby, you're living with him, isn't getting married the next step?" I ask her.

"Maybe for some people but to me it's from a time when women were property. We don't trade people for goats anymore so what purpose does this actually serve?" Jamie asks.

"Um maybe it's to show how much he loves you," I explain.

"My parents have been married nearly thirty years and I don't even think they like each other, but I love Asher and I don't need a ring on my finger or a piece of paper to make it official," Jamie explains.

"Then just talk to him, and leave out the goat trading speech unless you want to scare him off," I advise.

"Okay, thanks Ives, I'm gonna get going, leave you to finals," she gets up.

"Anytime," I call out.

—
Me and Jordan picked out a digital frame with custom photos for Liv while she's in London. Jordan just came over to help me sort them out. We were on the couch in the beach house, "hey you ok? What's up?"

"Family breakfast this morning, minus my dad," he mumbles.

"I'm sorry, love," I scratch my hand gently on his head.

"I thought I was passed it you know, but I've been missing him lately," he explains, "so many things I could talk to him about,"

"You know, you could get a therapist to talk to about your grief and go to his grave more, or hey you can talk to me, I know none of those things are the same as your dad but it's better than bottling it all up," I suggest.

"Yeah, I'll consider that, thanks babe, let's look at these photos," Jordan says.

"I need help finding one with JJ having a shirt on," I joke.

"Awhhh baby Jordan!" I coo at a picture, "what happened to you?"

"Okay I traded cute for sexy," Jordan explains kissing me, "your welcome,"

"Okay so what would that Jordan think of he knew we were gonna be together?" I ask.

"Well he'd be proud because you are the definition of perfect, and besides our dads were friends so I've seen you before, I kinda had a crush on you, you were my first crush," he explains.

"What? But we never talked. We sent each other family Christmas cards but that was it," I laugh.

"And I crushed on you every year your family's card came, I mean you were adorable," Jordan blushes. We continued tapping through photos when we came across one of Asher and Jamie.