Those In The Forest

Part 6: Reagan

"Ngh!" I shoved the dildo deeper inside me. Rubbing my clit with my other hand. Kneeling on my bed with my ass up and face in the pillows while masturbating is a new low for me. Very pathetic, honestly.

          This all started a week and a half ago. After that party when, I didn't end up taking anyone home, but I did run into a group of perverted women.

          I've been so fucking horny, but nothing helps. No matter what vibrator I use or what size dildo I stick inside me, I can't get off. No matter how hard I try, I can't come, and it's the most stress-inducing thing I've had to deal with.

         Considering I'm on the verge of being homeless, it's embarrassing how not being able to come is what is stressing me out the most.

          I circled the pads of my middle and ring finger over my clit, feeling myself get closer to the edge, but that's all I could manage. I always get close, but I never feel myself shudder with ecstasy.

          This has never happened before. I think something is wrong with me.

          I even tried watching different kinds of porn. It's getting so bad I ventured over to straight porn but quickly cut it off. Hearing the men grunt and groan was not helping me get to the fireworks I'd been struggling to feel.

          "Ahhh!" I yelled into my pillow, pulling the dildo out and throwing it across my small apartment room. Turning around on my back, I stared up at the ceiling. My body was covered in a light sheen of sweat. This is torture. It's like I've been cursed.

          Since I haven't been able to come lately, I've been running a lot more. That seems to be what I need tonight.

          Even though I had that experience at that party, I did go back to the trail and run a few times. The view in the morning is breathtaking, especially when I run in the morning and the morning dew is still stuck on the grass and trees.

          It's late, though, so the trail is closed.

          I sighed, throwing my arms over my face. I honestly just want to run there. I know the paths. I know where to go and how to get back, even if it's in the dark.

          I blew out a harsh breath. I could always park a mile away from the trail and sneak into it. It's not like they have workers there monitoring it all the time.

          I rose up on my elbows, looking over my room. I asked the landlord for an extension, promising I would have the money next month. He argued with me for a while before finally saying yes, only if I paid interest. That's fine. I don't need food or gas anyway.

          I sat up from my bed and headed toward my dresser, grabbing a pair of shorts, my sports bra, and a hoodie. Seattle is a little chilly, but if I wear too many layers, I will die on that run.

          I threw them on and padded over to the nightstand, where my phone screen lit up. I picked it up and saw Bryce texting me. She wants to hang out.

          It's nine at night. I don't really want to hang out. Her argument is always, 'Let's go out to get you laid.' Well, I know my body, and if I can't get myself off, I know for a fact no one else can.

          I opened her text thread.

Reagan: Can't tonight. Have to work early tomorrow.

          It was a lie, but she didn't need to know that, and it was the best excuse I could think of. Bryce texted me back immediately.

Bryce: ugh! Fine. But on your next off day, you're all mine!