𝗙𝗢𝗨𝗡𝗗 | bucky barnes

50: Back to work

Working was a regular thing for Catarina. She liked it that way— Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday. Ten to five. It gave her something repetitive, something she could count on. She worked for a department of the CIA. Technically, she was an agent— completely certified to go on missions. But that wasn't the work she did for them. In actuality, when she told people she filed papers for the CIA, they weren't impressed.

Cat definitely had never been famous. Sure, she fought against Tony Stark on the side of Captain America. Sure, she fought against Thanos. But no one really knew that. No one knew her. No one knew what she had been through. She went through combat testing for the CIA, some other tests, and attained the title of agent, but what she did wasn't even close. They weren't supposed to know about her powers. From what they knew through the very few articles and whatever they could decode from Hydra's files, Cat couldn't control her powers, and couldn't use them at will. She thought it was better to let them think that.

Most of what she did was digitizing and scanning salvaged papers from S.H.I.E.L.D. She worked at a desk in her own office, with a name plaque at the front reading AGENT C. PALMER. She stayed in there until her lunch break, went to the cafe across the street for thirty minutes, then went back to work in her office filing paper after paper. At five, she would take the train back to Brooklyn, and go home. Work was in Manhattan in a big, fancy, glass building. It used clean lines and modern architecture, and was very minimal on the inside—a.k.a., it was boring.  Cat was always glad to leave.

She would then come home and talk to Bucky for a little while about her day over dinner, then ask about his. He would give a blunt answer and they would change the subject. Bucky would always have dinner ready when Catarina came home from work; it was their tradition. Whether it be something he tried to cook or Indian takeout, something was always waiting for her after the hour long train ride back to Brooklyn. She appreciated every bit of normalcy she could get.

Repetitiveness was something Cat had never stopped liking.  Silence, she wasn't so fond of anymore.  But things that were normal, that repeated on a scheduled basis, that weren't so random? That was something she'd barely ever had in her life.  It was something she liked.

Most mornings she would wake up and Bucky would already be awake, making coffee.  She would ask him when he had woken up and he would say a time only about an hour before— but the dark circles under his eyes told Cat that it had been earlier than that. She knew he hadn't gotten a good night's sleep in a while.

He didn't have nightmares in Wakanda.  They slept together in Wakanda.  The same bed.  Here, Bucky slept on the floor, and Cat would sleep on the couch.  She'd offer to switch but he would say no, that he was perfectly fine on a blanket on the floor.  Catarina wanted nothing more than to hold him close and just understand.  For him to let go and just let it all out, because Cat really wanted to listen.  But she'd asked his therapist before, what he had been telling her, what he had said about nightmares and all that, and she had only replied, "If I had anything to tell you, I still couldn't.  But he doesn't give me anything."

Cat just wanted them to be okay.  She wanted everything to be okay.

Catarina was getting dressed one morning when Bucky called her name from the living room.  She couldn't tell what his tone was from so far away, she needed to see his face for that.  Though lately, she hadn't been able to read his emotions as easily as she used to.

"Cat," he'd said.

Catarina slipped her jacket over her shoulders quickly and walked into the room. "What's up?" she asked, the end of her question trailing off as she looked from Bucky's face of silent anger to the TV.  It showed Good Morning America.  There was an interviewer and a man sat in chairs in a stadium surrounded by celebrations of red, white, and blue.  The caption at the bottom read: JOHN WALKER NAMED CAPTAIN AMERICA.

Cat's face became one of anger, too.  She looked down at Bucky, who looked up at her.  They communicated nothing— they only wanted to see how the other reacted. 

"How could they do this?" she asked, sitting next to him on the floor and watching the TV.

"Did you know Steve Rogers?" the announcer asked him.

"Well, I was two years out of West Point when Steve came back on the scene.  I followed his career very closely as an Avenger," replied Walker. "I like to think that I modeled my work after his."

"So you've always wanted to be a hero?" assumed the announcer.

"I liked that what I was doing would make people feel safe," replied Walker. "Steve Rogers was the kind of guy who could do that.  He gave me hope.  Even though I never met him, he feels like a brother."

Bucky's jaw clenched, and Cat stared at the TV.

"And he has the..."

"The real shield," replied Bucky.

"But didn't..."

"Sam gave it away," remarked Bucky angrily.  Cat could see his fists were clenched and his jaw still locked.  He glared at the television.  "He gave it to the government, and the government gave it to him."

"How could he.."

"I don't know," said Bucky, standing up quickly.  Cat did the same.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

"We?" he repeated. "Me," he cleared up. "Don't you have work?"

"You and I both know that anyone in that building can do what I do.  I can take a day.  I'm coming with you."

"Fine," said Bucky, grabbing his jacket and gloves.  He looked her work outfit up and down, seeing the dress suit. "But you're not wearing that."

Cat turned and rushed into the closet. She used her powers to help her throw on cargo pants and a dark tee shirt.  Over it, she pulled on a jacket. She pinned her hair to the side with a quick motion and hopped into her now rarely used Doc Martens, eager to get out the door.

"Let's go," she said, grabbing the keys and hopping ahead of her boyfriend, out the door.

a.n.

hey guys happy belated monday (aka Tuesday)

anyways my writing in this chapter? chefs kiss. i hate to praise myself but like i feel like a completely different person wrote this. i always feel differently about a chapter right before i publish. i suppose im always just excited for u guys to see it!

anyways, don't forget to vote! bye!

molly