Foolish Games

39. The cabin

Joni started to wake, soft cigarette smoke irritating his nostrils, his eyelids flickered and he groaned softly before opening his eyes. He saw Chris who was sitting on a stool, smoking and watching him with a cold, unreadable expression.

The bed on which he was laying wasn't soft like the one they had at home. A narrow path of sunlight poured from between the slightly open curtains, crossed the room, and landed on the room's closed oak door. Joni blinked. His head was throbbing and his mouth felt dry. Silence...

He gazed at the painting of a forest on the bedside, recognized it, and frowned.

"Your dad agreed we could spend some time here, they won't bother us since I told them we could use some time alone since you've seemed down lately... You know, spend time all romantic and shit." Chris chuckled dryly, "I hoped it could be that," he sighed then and Joni turned his eyes to him slowly. He still felt drowsy from the sleeping drug and didn't quite understand the situation.

"I'm so disappointed in you," Chris continued, inhaling some smoke, tilting his head, "are you ready to tell me his name?"

His family knew they were here but they wouldn't come since they didn't know what Chris could do... The room seemed so warm and homely, the yellow light in the oak room, it had been a while since he had been here, too long ago perhaps, and now... His heart started to beat faster again, he should think about his words carefully and should try to ease the situation if it was possible.

"His name doesn't matter," Joni whispered finally, turning his gaze back to Chris, who frowned and almost looked hurt, vulnerable. "Chris..." Joni continued, licking his lips, staying still, it was difficult to think when he was still affected by the drug, "I-" he didn't know what to say if there was anything that he could do to turn the situation around, where he wouldn't be hurt. "...I'm scared..." He decided to confess, tears rising in his eyes, "Please..."

For a moment Chris only continued to stare at him and Joni thought that he saw his eyes glimmer with tears waiting to be shed but the next moment he cleared his throat and his gaze hardened.

"I can't stand the thought of you being with someone else, it makes me sick..."

Joni struggled to sit up, "W-we can fix things, we can talk..." He whispered not wanting to annoy the man further, this was already serious.

"So now you want to fix it?" Chris raised his brow, almost looking amused.

"It's not too late..." Joni continued, "Can't it be like it was before? Remember? We were happy...." He swallowed, felt a tear running down from his eyes, landing on his lip and he carefully licked the salty taste away.

Chris sighed, "Yes, I thought we were... you changed..."

Joni swallowed, letting his gaze drift to the ceiling, watching the thin smoky rings floating above.

"You shouldn't smoke in here," he said softly, looking back at Chris, perhaps trying to distract him with idle conversation. "Dad wouldn't like it, he never smokes inside."

Chris shrugged, "I can air it off later," he answered and opened the curtain a little further, gazing outside for a moment. This calmness was odd Joni thought, lowering his feet on the floor while his hand reached out to touch his sore cheek. "I changed my life to be with you, I moved here for you, I have been faithful to you... you just don't care... " He was still looking outside, drawing another deep breath of the cigarette, his elbow resting against the writing desk next to the window.

Joni was silent for a moment, trying to remind himself to stay calm, to not raise his voice. To just remain as calm as possible, hoping it would keep Chris calm as well.