This is how it started (Elementary Series #01)

Chapter 34

"What is this?" Sev asked and gave me an envelope. He looks serious. And mad? What? Why?

We are now in our house, mom and dad isn't here because Raven have her monthly check up. Charles is in school and I just got home from school. We have a half day class and I practiced for the UP-Pep squad; we have been practicing for weeks for the NCAA. While Sev is busy as well, practicing for the UAAP. We haven't seen each other aside from Sunday and video calls every day.

Then suddenly he just went here without telling me, mad asking what is inside the envelope I didn't even know, something is off about him when I saw him looking so mad outside our house.

"I don't want to fight so I just want to hear your explanation before I conclude anything" he said and sit beside me. I then frowned and got the envelope to check what's inside.

It was a picture of me and James. Again. James again. Lagi na lang siya ang issue.

"These pictures doesn't mean anything. Can't you, see? He was just helping me. He was helping me carry heavy things in one of our org's event. He just helped me when I accidentally bumped into someone and my things were scattered in the floor. All of this were just a pure help and friendship. Kung sino man ang nagpadala sayo nito, magaling siyang mag-edit at hindi kita ang ibang tao, bukod saming dalawa" sabi ko at binagsak ang mga picture sa mesa.

"I am not accusing you" he said to me and I faked a laugh.

"Yeah, you were not accusing me but your eyes do. I can see how you looked at me like I did something wrong again, when in fact I didn't do anything. You're not blaming me by your words, but you already blamed me in your mind" I said and he sighed and looked at another the pictures.

"You knew that I am still jealous of him. How can he be there to help you while I cannot?" he said. I don't know if he's questioning me or questioning himself.

"Are we going to talk about your jealousy again? Because if yes, I am already tired of that topic"

We were both silent for a few minutes.

"I am so jealous to the point that I am always asking myself, if this relationship can still make you happy or mad because of my jealousy. Dammit! I should really transfer to UP" he added and then covered his face in frustration.

"Baby, look at me" I said and held his hands to uncover his face.

"I don't want you seeing me like this. Jealous and doubtful" he said, but then I still uncover his face.

"Look at me. Do you think I am happy that you are insecure?" I asked and he's just looking at me. "I am not. I am not happy being insecure to someone who's not even close enough to you. I am not happy to the fact that you always lose your trust whenever you see me with him. I am not happy that you always blamed and accused me in your mind of doing something that I did not do. I am not because all of our fights, is all about James. I am not happy because you always doubt me, when you should trust me instead." I told him.

I don't want to get mad and I don't want us to fight again. But what he's doing now is seriously hurting me. Why are we like this? I knew that in relationship, there will be fights and all, but then I don't want to get hurt by the same reason.

His reason isn't even good enough for us to fight.

"I trust you. I really do. I just don't trust him. I felt like anytime he can get you to me. He can get your attention and love."

"And you said that you trust me. Kung may tiwala ka, sana nagtitiwala ka na hindi ako maaagaw ng iba" sabi ko at tumayo na. "Bahala ka na kung mas maniniwala ka dyan. Basta ako naipaliwanag ko na ang totoong nangyare. Matanda ka na para mag-desisyon ng kung anong gusto mong mangyare" dagdag na saad ko at umakyat sa kwarto.