Home [Beastars Legoshi x fem!reader]

Chapter 51 - Changing course

Love is a funny thing.

Barely noticeable, yet one of the most powerful forces in the world. A force that exceeds the terrors of war, greed and violence.

People always say that if there is one thing worth fighting for, it is love. It knows no bounds; not from race, gender, nationality, language or faith.

It comes in so many forms. Eros, the sexual and passionate love. Philia, also known as friendship or bearing goodwill to another. Storge, the familial love that is supposed to connect a child and their family. Agape, the universal love that connects you to the rest of your world, to nature and even to strangers you've never met. Ludus, the playful and uncommitted love. Pragma, the kind of practical love founded on reason or duty and one's long-term interests. Lastly there's Philautia, which is self-love; a blessing and a curse.

Love is such a funny thing if you think about it.

It makes your heart flutter around certain people and the world seems just a little brighter whenever they're around. You care for them, you care about their life, their interests, their hardships; if you could, you'd probably sacrifice your own happiness to guarantee theirs. Sometimes, you wonder what it'd be like to spend the rest of your life with them, seeing their smile every day.

Because every time they smile, your life seems worth living. Every time they laugh, you're grateful to be alive, thankful to be a part of their time on this earth. You hold them in their time of need and in the best case, they do the same for you. They care about your hardships. They care about you and stick by your side through it all.

Because that is what love does to a person.

So why did Legoshi leave?

Standing there, completely alone in the darkness of the night, beneath the stone arches you once admired so much for their beauty and now hate for what they remind you of, your heart shatters inside your chest.

You didn't feel this type of pain when you died, nor when you realized that you wouldn't be able to go back. Every single panic attack that plagued you afterwards didn't come close to this. When the Shishigumi captured you and almost ended your life once again, the pain you felt back then is nothing compared to the one that consumes your entire body at this very moment.

Legoshi gave you hope.

Hope that no matter what happened to you, someone would be in your corner and help you through it. Hope that you weren't destined to live the rest of this damned existence utterly alone. He gave you hope that no matter what, things would be okay.

That you would be okay.

But he left. Like everyone else, he left you without even giving you an explanation. Just like Louis, he didn't seem to think that you're worth an explanation.

You hate this; every single drop of blood inside of you is boiling to a point where breathing is too much to bear. You want to claw at your scalp, your skin; you want to destroy yourself to a point where you are no longer recognizable. The anger that burns within your chest, the disappointment and frustration, none of it is directed at Legoshi.