Complicated (r.j.lupin)

Aftershave

{Slight trigger warning-if this chapter affects you in any way personally then please reach out, I would like to help <3 Love you all x}

It was the day of Harry's trial and everyone sat round the table anxiously waiting for the results to come in. Sirius had been pacing back and forth on zero sleep and Caitlin and Remus had stayed with him, despite the full moon being only a day away. The Weasley's had gone out shopping, more so for Molly then anyone else and Kingsley and Tonks were at the ministry awaiting the news.

Remus was exhausted but tried to hide it the best he could and Caitlin knew this.

"Go upstairs, try to get some sleep" she whispered, out of ear shot from Sirius.

"No I'm okay love I just need-"

Liv slowly walked in...eyes glassy, hands shaking and a face as white as a ghost. Her bottom lip was trembling as she stared blankly at the table in front of her. All three head turned to her in confusion, Caitlin and Remus standing up cautiously as if ready to catch her and Sirius slowly making his way over to her with an outstretched hand.

"Blondie?" he said gently, his voice careful and low, "Everything okay?"

"M-my...my-" she couldn't speak, her breath was getting caught in her throat and her head was pounding, she felt tear after tear roll down her cheeks and her chest began heaving up and down rapidly.

"Liv..." Remus said gently, walking round the table and placing both hands on the side of her arms, "Deep breaths okay" he gestured with his hand for her to inhale and exhale like he was doing but she just shook her head rapidly.

"I can't...I can't -I can't breathe...Remus I can't fucking breathe" she began hyperventilating, panicking as her chest got tighter and her throat restricted. Caitlin and Sirius stood helpless behind the two, watching as she panicked, the tears falling effortlessly from her eyes.

"Come on love...In and out it's that easy...look at me" he continued gesturing with his hand but it was no use she still shook her head, grabbing on to the sleeve of is arm in panic.

"let me try" Caitlin said gently, moving him out of the way and talking to her friend, attempting with all her might to soothe the tears.

"What happened?" She asked, brushing away the hair that stuck to her cheek.

"My-my..." she still couldn't get her words out, her legs were about to give way any moment, she just knew her body wanted to collapse in itself, wanted to scream, wanted to break down.

Caitlin was swiftly pushed aside as Sirius caught on to what was about to happen and wrapped his arms around. She fell into his chest immediately as they both sank to the floor, her sobs and cries filling the entire kitchen. He held her head against his chest as she gripped onto his tear stained shirt.

"He's gone isn't he?" He whispered gently into her hair as she slowly nodded, her whole body trembling underneath him. She screamed, a piercing and excruciatingly painful scream turning into more violent sobs.

"I didn't even get to say goodbye!" she shouted as Sirius tried his best to soothe her, both sat on the floor, enveloped in each other's arms.

Remus wrapped his arm around Caitlin as he saw the tears run down her cheeks for her friend. Both Remus and Sirius sharing a look in the process, a look of understanding, of sorrow.

"Come on love, let's get you upstairs" Sirius whispered, picking her up quite effortlessly and carrying her out of the room as she clung to his chest.

"You okay, darling?" Remus asked gently, never removing his arm that was holding her against him as she nodded into his shirt.

"You know...the first time I met her dad, it was on Platform nine and three quarters. We had just finished our first year and me and Liv had became friends almost instantly-"