Winter Bear

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April 20, 20XXTuesday pt

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April 20, 20XX
Tuesday pt. IV
'Taehyung POV'

Smiling into the palm of my hand, I stare outside my office window, revisiting earlier's date for the fifth time this morning. 

My phone buzzes against my desk and I turn down to read the alarm notification:

Jennie.

I feel relieved that today marks another day that I get to swipe the notification away without reading it because...I still remember  her.

I must be a lucky man.

My time with Jennie felt both long and short. I think it felt that way because my heart feels full from having enjoyed spending so much time with her, but my heart understands the sweet sorrow of our parting.

Nevertheless, there's the next time we will see each other (and my heart races at the thought of laying eyes on her once more), but it won't be soon.

While I came in to work, I made sure she rested. I was used to coming in on little hour's sleep so it was better for me to come in than stay at home and drive myself crazy from the anticipation.

What would it be like when I see her again?

Will I wait for her to say something for me first or will I build the courage to go up to her?

The butterflies in my stomach flutter about and I have to clutch my arm against it to calm myself down.

It took a lot for me to even ask her on a date and I almost wasn't going to.

Yet, I remembered the conversation I had with Yeri. She gave me the advice to stop thinking with my head and to start going after what my heart was telling me. By listening to my head all the time, I was only going to hurt my heart that would fill quickly with all my regrets.

I didn't need any more of those.

I already regretted my mistake of distancing myself from Jennie and Yejoon and really regretted letting Sungjae get so close to Jennie.

There was something about Sungjae that generally upsets me and it was because I had so many unanswered questions.

Sungjae already knew Jennie when she started working here...

Were they always friends? Even when I was in Japan?

Did my accident just bring them closer?

Sungjae claims we were friends, but how could a friend fall for his friend's wife?

Why do I remember feeling so angry during our competition in Japan? 

A sharp pain comes from the side of my head, causing me to press on it as hard as I can for some relief.

I'm getting too worked up.

If I continue, I'm going to have another memory lapse.

Taking a deep breath, I decide to focus on the present, the one where I've just returned from my date with Jennie and the one where I realize I'm still in love with her.

Before, I always questioned the attraction I felt towards Jennie, mistaking it for the need of normalcy in my life. I realize now that it wasn't that, but a magnetic attraction.

I'm still charmed by her.

A knock on the door disturbs me.

Blinking my eyes, I look over to see Irene standing in the doorway, arms crossed and magazine in her hand.

Walking over to my desk, she lays it on my desk.

"Congratulations on the achievement, V."

I raise my eyebrows, shifting in my seat to go pick up the magazine.

My eyes quickly gloss over the cover, looking up at Irene with surprise. 

My photos made it into Shutter magazine, known for its lists and rankings of global photographers in all branches of photography. The cover has my name in bold letters, my profile taking up the rest of it.

"H-how?" My voice trembles.

Irene smirks, proud of herself. "I sent them in, with the help of my father of course."

She sits on the corner of my desk.

"Do you know what this means?" I ask my business partner. 

She gives me a firm nod. 

"You'll have more attention on you."

My heart sinks. 

"We're going to be booked until the next year, maybe even one more after that."

I can't handle that pressure.

Irene leans in close and says my name in an attempt to get me to snap out of the anxiety I'm feeling.

I look up at her.

"Taehyung, we don't need this place anymore. This studio was just to get you to get your name out there. We've done that."

I frown as I continue to stare up at her.

She looks up, her head high in the clouds. "We're going to move up the chain. We're going to be working with big names now, from celebrity shoots to music videos."

My voice struggles to come out of my throat. 

"I can't..."

"Relax, you got me. You'll always have me." She tilts my chin up and smiles.

I gulp and look back down at the magazine. 

Irene hops off of my desk, knocking down a pile I have stocked on there.

She bends down to pick everything up and when I look to the pile on the ground, I freeze as her hand hovers over a pink journal.

"Hm? What's this? A book-"

I get off of my chair so fast and grab it from her, putting it behind my back.

I regret doing so shortly after, knowing it just makes me look more suspicious.

Irene can't hide how shocked she is as she looks up at me.

Getting up, she clears her throat. "I'm sorry. It must be a limited edition, huh?"

I nod my head, eyes falling to the ground. 

"I get it. Well, I'm going to go handle the press then we can meet after lunch with my father to discuss next steps."

Before I can say anything, she turns on her heels and leaves. 

I stood still, having stopped breathing and the realization hitting that there really wasn't anything I could do.

Winter Bear was going to close.

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