Everything You Wanted Me To Be.

Chapter 10

I feel the sway of movement and my eyes open wide. I'm caught by the light and blink a few times. Jace is carrying me through the car park to the lift of the penthouse. " I can walk you know?" He smiles and looks down at me. "I've got you" I'm still tired so I don't fight it, I take a deep breath and his cologne fills my nose, the slight scent of old tobacco and mint also there. I have no doubt this jacket is one he has warn on many nights out. Jace never smoked around me, but once he'd had a sip of liquor hed succumb to his old cravings. That sweet smell old tobacco has, when it's barely there but just adds a sweet tint to any smell. It's not a disgusting over powering smoker smell, it's subtle and masculine. I loved that smell.

Jace pushed the pent house door open and lies me on the sofa, I stand up quickly and rummage through the Tesco bags. I find my lounge set and slippers and pad over to my bedroom and get change, when I come out Jace has put a cold glass of wine on the table along with a variety of the sweet treats I chose. I run around lighting the candles. It's turned into another cloudy wet day. The perfect weather for films and candles. I look at the clock, it's only 1400 but dark enough for the candles to cast a subtle shadow. Despite Jaces lay out of goodies I can't see him. I decide to plonk myself on the sofa and begin to watch Married at first site. After a few minutes Jace walks in, he's back in cotton joggers and a tight black Calvin Klein tshirt. It hugs his abs. He looks incredible in this outfit. He sits next to me and I can feel his stares on me.
" thanks for the wine." I smile and take a sip. Drinking at 1400, who am I?
" it's your wine, I just poured it, if it was my wine it would be much better, or it wouldn't be wine at all." He smirks. He pulls as glass of brown liquor to his lips. "Whisky already?" I raise a brow, I'm judging. "I need to relax. We need to talk and I don't think I can get through it without." " I thought you were sober?" My voice is accusing, but I'm sticking with it. His alcohol consumption ruined us. I won't let it ruin me again. "Grace, I know my drinking was such an issue for you, I've cut down. I don't go out anymore. I just have a casual drink from time to time." "To calm your nerves?" "Yes that and to relax" "because that sounds like an excellent use of alcohol" I'm pushing him, he's trying to stay calm I can tell. "You can be mad, but I bet you finish the bottle before I do." He smirks at me. He's probably right.

"What did you do for the last three months?" Im curious, I hope im not overstepping. He never was a lover of sharing his life. "Mostly worked, I went to AA and it wasn't for me, I started going to the gym, I enjoyed it. It was a good outlet for my anger. I finally joined a football team. Running around charging at people is very enjoyable." "Mmm... I'm sure being allowed to break people's faces in games is better than at bars right?" "Grace, I'm trying here. Stop trying to push my buttons." He's angry. I know that tone. I'll give him credit in Chicago he'd of been out the door and down to target browsing the top shelf by now. "Sorry" I quite and focus on the TV. " I came here because I want to try again Grace, we never broke up. We just were having space, then I never heard from you again." I couldn't break up with him, I'd have said some hurtful shit and left but he'd have followed. It was easier asking for space. Whilst yes he has indeed followed me, it did take enough time for me to plant new roots. "I don't want you as my boss." I change the subject. "Grace, I can't change my position, I'm sorry I ended up as your boss but if you were going to stay with Atlas it was always going to happen eventually." I think about this for a second. It's true. Even if I remained an entire continent away, he'd become CEO one day, and whilst not directly, he would be my boss.
"Jace I don't want to go around in circles. You hurt me, you abused me and you weren't there on my darkest days. I was in a country with no family, my friends were at college, I was stuck in our apartment alone and broken. You didn't even try to fix me. You just broke me. You left and got drunk, doing god knows what with god knows who." I wince at our last encounter. He had been at a party with his friends, I never liked his friends, they were all rich but all fucked up for differing reasons. They fucked with girls feelings for sport and they drank to numb their thoughts. I'd found Jace with a bottle of Vodka in his hand, a girl wrapped around his hips. I must have been an idiot to let him back into this apartment, back into my life. I down my wine and stand up. "It was a mistake you coming here. We can't fix the past." "No but we can move forward." I roll my eyes. Like I haven't heard that over 50 times.