Youth (NEYMAR JR)

Setenta E Oito - Our Little Secret....

The bathroom tiles felt cold and hard on my bare skin, since I was wearing pyjama shorts. The bathroom was silent and the only sounds I can hear were from the living room. I felt shaky and still worried, god I think I am going to be feeling like this from now on. 

Neymar and I were both sitting down on the cold tiles, leaning back and basically just thinking. Thinking about what the hell we are going to do. He calmed me down and hold me in his safe arms. I felt so weak and hopeless. I also feel so dumb, since I don't know what the hell I am going to do. 

Minutes of silence went by, until he decided to speak. 

"I had a feeling this would happen," He says, and I look at him seeing him smile a bit. Why was he smiling? Isn't this supposed to be a nightmare? He's going to have a second child, but we are not sure about that because I also make the decision on this. 

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" I ask him, looking down and tracing my fingers on the patterns of the tiles. 

"Who wouldn't want to have a baby with this beautiful girl, who is talented, smart, cute, caring, warm-hearted, funny, sexy, b-" I cut him off right there, because it's starting to not make sense at all. Not that it made sense in first place. 

"Why are you saying all this?" I ask him, giving him my full attention. 

It takes a while to him to answer, instead he just doesn't say anything back. He looks around the bathroom as if he was looking for something. He looks down the tiles and around the small bathroom that we have been sitting in for at least an hour. 

"Why are you saying all this now?" I repeat myself, and this time he actually looks at me. 

 "It's hard to get over someone you once loved" He says the least expected thing. Once loves.

"Bu-" He cuts me off, placing his index finger on my lips to shut me up. 

"Let me correct that,....it's hard to get over someone you love" He than stares at me, full eye contact, his finger still placed on my lips, we were only inches away. If this was me a few months ago I would have probably already been on top of him, but today I just can't.

I am still shocked and scared, worried, terrified, frightened, and confused about taking this  test and boom! finding out I am pregnant. God, I just wish someone tells me that the test is not true.

I pull away, keeping my distance from him. We were so close that we could smell each others breath and cologne.

I look away, feeling nothing but confused and maybe a little angry. We both found out that I am pregnant and he's acting as if it hasn't happened. How many girls has he gotten pregnant that it all seems so normal to him?

"Did I make y-you un-comfortable?" He asks, trying to look at me but I just look away.

A weird angry feeling inside me starts to boil. I feel so mad and confused. It's like all my hormones has gone crazy, and I can't figure out how I am feeling. 

I stand up in a click. I stand right in front of him, looking down at him and clenching my fists.

"I just got this fucking test and found out that I have this thing inside me that's going to grow soon, yet here you are talking about this romance shit and acting so calm, do you have any idea how scared I am? Do you? If you are the father of this thing you better help me through it because I am........I am not having this baby!" The last few words were to load and I am just hoping no one heard me.

Watching Neymar looking up at me with worried eyes makes me worried to, yet I just shouted at this poor boy. I don't know why I decided to shout out " I am not having this baby!". This whole thing is to new and confusing to me that I haven't even came to the point were you decide if you are going to have the baby or not.

He stands up, very slowly but I try to keep my eyes somewhere else but him.

"We need to talk about this before we make any decision" He  says while taking my hand and pulling me into his arms, while I of course start sobbing.

"Shhh, it's going to be okay. We will find a solution and I will go through this with you" He says rubbing my back while i nod with the tears raining down, making stains on his shirt.

"I may be an asshole sometimes, but I am not going to let you go through this alone, especially when almost the whole media knows you, I won't let you down" He says, and I just sob. I nod slowly and thank him for letting me stay in his arms. It feels so safe and strong, I like it.

"Remember when we had secrets when we were small tiny kids" He says, and it instantly gives me a small slight smile. 

"Yeah" I reply, still sobbing a bit but the fact that I am safe in his arms makes me somehow feel better. Weird right? 

"Well we have one new secret now...." He says and I feel his arms trace my belly. It tickles a bit, but I manage to keep in my laughter and screams. 

"Our little secret" He says rubbing my bloated belly. 

"Our little secret" I repeat with one last tear sliding down.