The world came into focus again very suddenly. All the people in white suits were standing where they had been before, bar one. Only he could see her, an echo of her former self with glazed eyes, hanging in the air beside a man with a bow.
He watched as the large green person put on a glove and snapped. There was a moment of silence, then he felt a shudder go through the world. And there, to his side, he saw the yellow world again. He reached for it, but it was impossible to enter through the stream of souls pouring out of it and streaming gleefully away in all directions. As soon as the last soul was clear, the rip in the universe snapped shut. He had a feeling that this time would be forever.
He watched the dead woman watching. She saw the other world, watched with a glimmer of recognition, but did not reach for it. She hung beside the man, resigned to her own fate. He drifted towards the shadow of a woman, and slipped his own ghostly hand into hers.
"Natasha," he said, as loudly as he could manage. "Your name is Natasha."
The woman looked up, some mist clearing from her eyes as he gave her the thing he'd needed all these years. Her form sharpened a little, her hand becoming more solid in his. "Peter?"
"Yes," Peter whispered, feeling a surge of strength go through him at the name.
Peter. That had been his name. He mouthed the word, whispering it into the world.
The man below him frowned a little, and shook his head, turning away from his companions.
Natasha looked sadly down at Clint. Because that was her man's name, and below Peter...
"Mr Stark?" He asked, hardly daring to believe it. He remembered. Not everything... but enough.
The man - Mr Stark - clutched at his head as if he could hear Peter, but that was impossible.
"Where are you going?" Asked one of the others. Steve.
"To get some fresh air."
"Fine. The rest of us need to go see if our loved ones are back anyway. Not that you would understand how that feels."
Tony strode out before anyone could say anything else. Peter stayed behind for as long as he could manage, enough to see their phones start to ring, pictures of the people who made it to the yellow world flashing up. He trailed a smoky hand over Natasha's, then let himself be pulled away by Mr Stark. He hoped he would see her again soon.
At Mr Stark's home - that was Pepper, and the girl must be their daughter - there was another figure waiting that a Peter recognised from a long, long time ago.
"Strange," Mr Stark said in greeting. "Where is he?"
"I was going to ask you the same thing."
"What do you mean?" Tony's face fell. "Was he not on Titan with you when you came back?"
Dr Strange shook his head. Tony let out a ragged sob, and strode to a photograph in the corner of his kitchen. Peter had seen it many times over the years, but now he realised that it was of him. That was what he'd looked like when he was alive.
Tony's finger caressed photo Peter's cheek. A single tear made its way down his face.
"How? Why?"
Strange just shook his head mutely.
Peter followed Tony as he flew to Peter's apartment, where he found a confused elderly couple and a dishevelled aunt May, but not what he was looking for. Next stop, Peter's school, where chaos reigned as snapped students wandered around in confusion. Still Mr Stark didn't seem satisfied, but now Peter couldn't remember what he was looking for. The clarity that his name had given to him was beginning to fade, and he couldn't hear as well, or take in as much detail. That boy, he knew him. What was his name?
Peter didn't know.
When Mr Stark made it home, Pepper embraced him. "What's wrong? Where have you been? Where is he?"
"I can't find him. He's not here."
"But everyone else who was snapped is back. He has to be here somewhere."
"He's not."
"Oh, Tony..."
A few days later, there was a team meeting. Clint was there, so Peter saw Natasha again. She seemed a lot more in control now, and hugged him as tightly as an insubstantial being could.
"Peter," she whispered. "What went wrong? We worked so hard to save everyone. I died to save you. Tony said you dusted- why are you here? Why are you... dead?"
Peter examined his non existential hands. He had avoided thinking about that day as much as possible. "I did dust. I... I don't know what went wrong. What about you? Why are you still stuck here?"
"What do you mean? Is this not the afterlife?"
"No. I... I saw the other side, that day. My family was there."
"Oh. I suppose, because my soul was forfeit for Clint to get the soul stone, I'm destined to roam this world forever."
"Oh."
They both looked up at their living anchors. Clint was still despondent in a corner.
"I just wish I had some way to comfort him," Natasha sighed. "To tell him I'm still here."
"Try," Peter urged. Talking to Natasha made him feel more... alive. "Sometimes if I feel really strongly about something, I can make contact."
Natasha looked skeptical, but reached out to touch Clint's shoulder anyway. Her hand passed through him.
"It was worth a try, I suppose."
"Stark, why do you look so miserable?"
Peter tuned back into the team's discussion.
"Yeah Tony, we won! You should be celebrating!"
"Maybe I don't feel like celebrating."
"Why not? Clint has a right to be sad, his partner died." Natasha flinched. "You didn't even lose anyone the first time."
Tony pursed his lips, but said nothing.
"Stark, you have to let it go, whatever it is. You're the luckiest one out of all of us. We went for years without our loved ones. You had everything."
"But now you have them back," Tony said, barely loud enough for Peter to hear.
"What?"
"I said, you get them back. I don't."
"You didn't even lose anyone!"
"Yes I did!"
"Who, Tony? Who did you lose that gives you a right to be so upset?"
"I-"
"Who died to make you so miserable when everyone who was gone is now back? Who?"
"MY SON!" Tony roared. "Peter died, that's who. Did any of you even think to ask where Spiderman had gone? He died in my arms, and I saw the pain in his eyes as he was torn apart, and I could do nothing. Peter is the reason I decided to help you, and I risked my life again, for what? Do you see him here? Do you? Because I don't. He didn't come back when Bruce snapped. Something went wrong, and now he's never coming back."
Tony's deep breathing was the only sound.
"I'm sorry," someone whispered.
There was a minute, then, "you said he seemed in pain. When I... when I went, it was painless. Almost numb."
There were several noises of agreement, but Peter didn't hear them. His memories were dark with pain. Natasha watched him worriedly, putting two and two together.
"It was your enhanced senses, wasn't it?" She said.
He didn't look up, only said, "The pain... it was unimaginable. I think it was too much for my body to handle. I think I died before I could fully dust."