It's been two weeks so far and I've managed to contain my feelings for Jacquees. Of course they were still there and seeing him and Janay all cuddled up everywhere wasn't helping at all. He and I still weren't friends and still weren't talking. All we talked about was schoolwork, that is if we were partners for that particular class. But anything other than that, we just don't talk. It's weird. We used to talk to each other everyday but now it's almost like we were never acquainted. I sat under a nearby tree on a hill with my bag next to me and my phone in my hand as I watched the football team. We had an in-school football game today against one of our rivals which allowed us to get out of our last two periods but only if you bought a ticket. I only bought one so that I could come up here and clear my head of everything. It was nice.
Suddenly, Jacquees walked over and sat down next to me with only his binder. I nervously squirmed in the grass beneath me. I still wasn't used to his presence. His face seemed more relaxed today. He usually tensed up whenever he got within a few feet of me like I was the flu or something but today he seemed fine. He brought his knees up a little and hung his arms over them resting his back and head against the tree. He looked down at the field watching the football team. A roar emerged from the crowd as we scored a first down. I wasn't a big fan of football but I knew how it went because that was all Dad used to watch so I was forced to watch it too and he taught me everything about it.
"Why are you up here?" he asked.
I just shrugged.
"I saw this place a while back and thought that it would be a good spot to hang out one day and just...forget about everything I guess. To think about stuff"
"It is" he said.
"You've been here before?"
"Yeah, I come here all of the time. Mostly to clear my head up. With a life like mine, I need this place"
"So something's wrong?" I asked.
"I just needed to talk to you"
I raised an eyebrow. What could he need to talk to me about. He had Janay, he had Tre, and he had the rest of the school to turn to. We hadn't talked in weeks and the only reason why I'm not popping off on him right now is for the sake of my sanity and I'm not in the mood for drama.
"I think this has gone on for long enough, Nic, don't you?" he sighed running his hands through his dreads.
I slowly nodded fumbling with my finger tips.
"I haven't been fine these past few days" he said with his head down. "I kept on thinking about who I could talk to about it and all I could think of was you"
I looked at him and turned around to fully face him.
"Well what's wrong?" I asked.
He took a deep breath and looked into my eyes with a look of slight anger and major upset.
"My mom...she got hooked up on drugs again"
My eyes widened.
"Ms. Pam? What happened?"
"Apparently, my dad tipped off the police and told them that he thought my mom was up to no good. Like he had a feeling that she was doing something wrong. So, the police broke into her apartment and saw her drugged up in bed...heroine" he said shaking his head and looking down.
"Que, I'm sorry" I sighed. "You really don't deserve this"
"Thanks. I'm just...I don't know what to do now. Both of my parents are fucked up. My dad didn't have to get my mom locked up and my mom could've resisted those damn drugs" he said putting his face in his hands.
I scooted over to him and put my arm around his shoulder pulling him into me. I put my chin on top of his head and he ran his thumb across the back of my hand.
"I can't lose your friendship, Nicole. Not now, please"
I kissed his forehead and rubbed his shoulder.
"You won't. I promise"
***
I felt better today. I was less upset and Jacquees and I were talking again. We were basically acting how we normally did when we went out except no affection and no title which was fine with me. Mr. Charleston went to the board to make a demonstration of a problem. I zoned out for a little bit not really caring about the lesson. I probably could just find a video on Youtube telling me how to do it if we even got homework on this.
When it came time for us to actually work as partners, we discussed the incident with his mom some more as we did our assignment. I suggested that he go the prison that she was being held in and at least talk to her because that was still his mother. He said he wasn't ready yet and he was disappointed in her at the moment. I would try to convince him later since it was a touchy subject right now so I dropped it and talked to him about something else. It was finally time to go and we packed up and left together. I had to go to my locker to pick up my history textbooks and he decided to come with me. We had the same classes anyway. He leaned up against the locker next to me waiting for me to get my books. Suddenly, Janay showed up.
"Hey, Que!" she excitedly squealed.
"Hey!" he beamed.
Out of the corner of my eye, I could see them kissing...on the lips! I was taken by surprise trying my best to hide my face. Keyana was right: those two could make a person throw up!
"Oh, Nicole, this is my girlfriend, Janay!" he said as Janay gave me a smile.
I returned the smile. I was pretty sure that she knew that Jacquees and I used to be together but I guess she was okay with it.
"Right, Nicole! I've seen you around school. It's so nice to finally meet you" she said.
"Same here" I replied with a nod.
"...well, I'd better be going. I just came over because I saw you" she said snuggling up into Jacquees.
He kissed her forehead and she went away.
"When did you guys start going out?" I asked.
"Uh...she was just one of the many people who were checking up on me while I was suspended and then we just started up a relationship from there"
"After we broke up?"
"No, we were talking as friends while you and I were together but then it started getting a little bit more flirtatious after we broke up. What's the problem?"
"Um..n-no problem. She's a sweet girl"
Jacquees' eyes lit up.
"Isn't she?"
"Yeah, she's gorgeous" I said with the best smile that I could manage.
"Well, I'm glad you think so. C'mon, we gotta get to class" he said.
I closed my locker and walked beside him to our next class. Something that I couldn't shake off is the sudden feeling of jealousy that was burning inside of me again. I had ended our relationship so why was I so jealous? Why were all of these feelings that I thought had been buried yesterday suddenly coming back? I couldn't begin to have feelings for Jacquees again. Yes, it was very hard for me to witness him gushing over another girl but that is his girlfriend and I don't want to be a homewrecker. Plus, how would that make me look to break up with someone and get back with them all because they have a new girl? I tried to put it all off...for our friendship.
I added pictures of people. Go to back to Chapter One to see a picture of Tammy, go back to Chapter Thirty to see a picture of Dre, and the picture onteh side of this chapter is of Janay. Anyway, what do ya'll think about Jacquees having a new girlfriend? How do you think it's all going to play out? Leave your comments!
-Bailey