Dean and Daniel led me to a set of stairs quietly. My mind was bombarded with unwanted emotions and defiance. I felt like Willow simply gave up on me just because of an addiction. She wouldn't understand, as much as I wanted her to.
Dan retrieved a stretched out paperclip from his pocket. We were currently in front of an old rusted yellow door that led to an old upstairs patio for a senior smoking section in the very back of Robert Lee Highschool. It stayed there for no reason at all.
He struggled until after a minute a 'click' signalled he had succeeded. "Finally," Dean muttered.
"I'd like to see you do better," Dan retorted.
I rolled my eyes at the banter. Yet I felt a twinge of jealousy at it, knowing I'd never get that. The company of a sibling I'd always be bonded for life with. Friends come and go, but always I would pick a sibling.
On the way up prior to getting there, we had to tolerate a stench from the hallway we walked through. An odor came through that hit me unexpectedly. "What the hell is that?"
"The pipes are old and haven't been cleaned in ages," Dean answered with his nose scrunched. I'm sure I mirrored the same.
Eventually all of us had gotten to a square patio. Basically, some tiles placed on the roof of the school with a tent hovering over. "This is it?"
"Pretty much."
"Wow."
Daniel chuckled, sarcastically, "Expected more city boy?"
"I expected less to be honest with you country kid," A playful smirk spreading across my face, his dropped immedately when he heard that.
"Hey Tom and Jerry, are we going to visit the clouds or....."
The evil twin gave me one last glare, "Absolutely."
"Ace, keep look out for right now," Dean said.
I looked from side to side in an exaggerated fashion, "For what? This place is clearly abandoned."
He shook his head, "The janitor every once in a blue moon checks it out up here. And I don't want to take my chances in it being a blue moon."
Daniel pulled out a lighter and lit up a blunt, he puffed quickly inhaling liesurely. "You both can waste time all you want, I'm going to enjoy myself," he said while exhaling.
"Hey save some for me jackass!"
I tried not to laugh at how funny Dean's features immediately changed to worry due to his brother evidently being greedy.
Need ran up through my spine smelling it. Although, my emotions were stronger. The guilt that pulsed in and out of me overcame it because of Willow.
Her mortified eyes bled in my memory more than anything. Never did I ever want to unsee something more than that. It hurt beyond words can describe. 'You're more than this' she said without actually saying it.
"Ace, are you joining us or what," Dean called while handing a blunt to Daniel.
I wanted to. The good Lord knows I desired it so much it pained me. All I could see were her vibrant, light, golden, brown eyes. Would she ever see me the same again?
"I....yes."
"First put this in your eyes; two drops each," Daniel tossed a tiny bottle of eyedropper to me.
When he noticed my questioning eyes, "They're to help your eyes not get irritated or red from the marijuana."
"Gotcha."
The rest was history, the first puff felt so good and wrong I almost laughed at the irony of it all. Just like that, my worries became faint almost vanishing.
Dean laughed like a maniac, and Dean just stood there smiling lazily.
Me? I couldn't get enough in all honesty. Every silent truth started to roll off of my tongue. Only that time, I didn't try to stop it.
"You know, that girl you guys saw?"
Daniel sat indian style still smiling lazily with his eyelids low as did his brother coming over. Dean responded, "She's pretty hot."
"She's mine," I stated firmly.
He chuckled, raising his hands in surrender, "A'ight man, you're tappin' that not me, chill out."
I sighed and passed it over to him, everything just splurged out. "She means more to me than I thought she did. I finally got a shot at something real. I guess instead of aiming at the target, I pulled the trigger on myself. At my stupid ass, confusing heart."
Daniel's glazed eyes met mine unfocused. "It's just weed."
I looked at him, well, since the effect of it was so strong; two of him. "That's what I thought. But I mean, I guess being forced to get it for your strung out Aunt, the tables turn."
Daniel grinned, "So it's kind of like after working at Mcdonald's for so long you can't actually be a customer anymore."
I nodded, "Right, since you already know what it is behind the scenes, it's hard to look at it the same."
Droning off. Droning off was exactly what I was doing. Pointlessly spilling personal shit on me and Willow. Whilst they listened trying to understand; high as the clouds.
Ofcourse Willow hated it. She knew the addiction of weed changed her aunt, ultimitely turning on her own niece. Making her do something she refused to be apart of.
Kind of like me and love. I thought that anything close to love was synthetic; that it's impossibile to attain. Almost like it was never existant in the first place.
"I love her." I slurred.
He raised a mocking eyebrow, "No you don't."
I went to say something but left it, "Fuck, I don't know."
My head went side to side observing them both. "You guys are pretty cool," I admitted. Even high they didn't judge me...much.
I inhaled regaining some more of an exquisite buzz, "Except for you Danny boy, you're a dick."
He turned to me while laughing like a child, "And you're a vagina Ace hole."
All of us laughed like a bunch of blissfully ignorant idiots. "I only like vagina," I retorted as if I were teaching it to a four-year-old.
"So you like yourself?" He asked sounding genuinely curious.
An hour and a half later, we realized it to be getting chillier.
All of the effects wore off gradually leaving me with a mental maze; my mind. Every burden came back. I thought I'd feel refreshed but all I could catch a hint of was a shame.
"That was fun Ace, you should come with us another time," Dean suggested.
"Slow your roll brother dear," Daniel cut in, "We'll talk about that the next time he smokes with us for free," he eyed me up an down.
And the asshole returns.
"No need to try and," putting my hands up to make air quotes, "Scare me off, I'll pay you back for this time when I can."
He no longer glared at me and opened the door to get inside. "We'll head to class seperately. Dean and I are walking with the pass. Find your own way to not get caught on the way back to class," Daniel sneered.
My nostrils flared in agitation, "I'll be just fine," I gestured toward the door, "You first," a sickly sweet smile reached from cheek to cheek.
Daniel stomped off, before Dean went, he pulled me off to the side, "I'm sorry about him, he's usually not like that."
"I would hope not, or he'd wear a lot more black eyes, and not just from me," I said.
Dean's expression turned into a sad smile, then left. I could tell he worried and cared about his brother. Maybe more than Dan knew. If I didn't know anything about them, I did know Dean was my preference in terms of the best sibling a twin could have.
Both of them were gone when I finally left, closing the door absent-mindedly.
***********************************
Hey Peeps,
Honestly, I finished this whole chapter in study hall *laughing emoji* no shame in my game. I've never smoked weed and if you feel the absolute need to call me out on not accurately describing the 'effects' go right ahead. I personally have never smoked nor drank, I look that shit up on Google. This chapter was moreso to give you insight on the twins and Ace's feelings a little better. I tried not to reveal too much, just relate the title to the actual storyline. I apologize if this triggered anyone. Although, I did worn at THE VERY BEGINNING and note the fact that this is The Boy With Bad Habits people. Not 'Happy Go Lucky Guy'. Anyway before I rant some more, have a great night/day/afternoon/evening.
xoxo
-Bri