It was one hell of a week, and I'm coming back a changed woman. I was so thoroughly changed I'd wake up early. When I looked at the little mirror next to the port window, I'd see the woman in Noah's drawing books. Dark buttery skin, the kind that her mother lovingly put lotion on for her before she could do it herself. And then when she as she came of age did it herself. Growing into her thick thighs and thick body with joy. Long box braided hair oiled. Lips made for kissing, fat in the best possible way. Pillows of love. Shiny brown eyes... And it went on and on. Then my shaky fingers would rub the mirror and still finding her again looking back at me. I was hired to Fix Noah, and he ended up fixing me. I wanted to find Noah, and he ended up finding me. That woman in the mirror, I smiled back at her, and I think she smiled back at me.
My clothes were on quickly, I grabbed what I needed and headed for the deck. A deep salty breath as the sailing boat chased seagulls along the edge of the shoreline. A friendly albatross eyed up the top of the mast and the empty crow's nest. It was a morning worthy of my camera and I was taking pictures later. But for once those pictures weren't for work they were just for us. We had pictures for us. I did a little happy dance; we were officially together. Yes, nerd brain that sounded like high school to me too but it's a big fucking step. I went into a second happy dance on the deck.
We did it.
Happy tears fell that I didn't want Noah to see. I'm not sure why he doesn't believe in happy tears but I'm not rocking the boat. We are on track and we are staying on track. Even though the marina dock is just a few hours out. Plus, our drive back to civilization I'm holding on to. I got the kid's party to prepare for and I still have to wrap Sims gifts. Third happy dance space camp. I wasn't looking forward to my Ex's party for the kids but I was interested in her getting that gift.
I think the bow of the ship is becoming my favorite place in the world. The memory of sex on that bow full supermaning me to ecstasy had me giggling. The fourth happy dance and I was ready for a happy dance party. It wasn't simply good sex loving sex it was the connection.
"I have you," he said. He said it like he was never letting go either. And has the winds of fortune below in the white sails the boat speeds up. My box braids kick the winds and the dawn lifts into the sky with the full confidence of the day. The warmth of the sun heats my dark skin, and I spread lotion on it. Before my final half day is over I have to get all the pictures for a week. The pictures I should have got instead of making love to and sometimes fucking Noah.
A week worth of pictures taken in a single day, great. Oil base lotion mix for my skin while still wet and then a shea butter lotion after that so two later. Sealing in all that moisture. I even do a tiny bit of white mineral sunscreen on my nose. I've yet to have it burn but if I'm that's going to be the spot. The mini picture adventure I was ready for it. Everything about my day was wings out and toes tip in the water. I was skimming those blue waves like all the other birds do. Humming to myself I saved my joyous sounds and got my day started for real.
I grabbed the camera and got to work on all the pictures we should have taken. I even left the second camera recording the water and sails. So many birds I've never seen this many birds sailing. With the camera out at the bow of the ship I open my arms. Smiling at the birds that I too had finally figured out how to be a part of the ocean and fly too. It was peaceful in a way that I haven't had in so long. I didn't want the vacation to be over. As much as I missed the kids and everything else. I didn't want this to end yet.
Click.
Click.
Picture after picture and all the gorgeous ocean life. The smell of pine and redwood growing and mixing with the salt. It wasn't just the front of the ship that birds were racing the boat; it was at the back as well. Maybe they mistake Noah's ship for a fishing boat.
Click.
Click.
All that picture taking took me back to the bow of the ship. I was in a fit of happy giggles with my camera in one hand as I leaned forward into that fresh salty woodsy breeze. When Noah's arms wrapped around me it was like my world bloomed. It wasn't only his world stopping for me but mine stopped for him. I lean back into his arms. His nose rubbed against my neck, and I couldn't help myself. My ass cocked back on the autopilot.
"Do we have time?" I asked him. My voice was regrettably three steps away from a whine in my voice. I was ready for more. I'd been nothing but a sex heathen the whole weekend. There wasn't a time where I wasn't trying to climb mount Neptune. A part of me had to do as much as possible. I turned myself into sex jello rolled over and begged him to hit it again. Sometimes, you can't get close enough. Each time I fell asleep I couldn't believe it and it was a sea of I love you's. An ocean of tomorrows and a universe of everything kisses. I told myself I deserved this and believed it. And just this once I tasted a tiny bit of forever and kept wanting all of it.
"No, unless you want to spend another week?" He answered me. Yes, I wanted to spend another damn week. The thought pops in without thinking about it fully. I had no time to spend another week until the kids' birthday party was coming. So, many little things to do.
"Right, I forgot about the dock time." Sadness spread within me. I wanted to stay. "I had a great time," he kissed my neck. The roughness of his beard caused a shiver in me. This man had my body train for pleasure at this point. I was prime because more and more wasn't coming.
My phone rings and I perk up. The kids hadn't called me all weekend. I was going to call them and I couldn't wait anymore. But we had been waking up at weird hours. I lean over into my camera bag and pull out my phone.
"Hello," I say.
"Yes, Tari. It's Sharr, I'd let to get you to sign up and come on board to the One Night Only Event for next year. I have an offer." She says with that crisp no nonsense ice lady voice. At the same time there's a smile in her professional voice. You could hear it in her voice, the kind of real smile that actually reaches her eyes.
"Oh," and I gazed up at Noah before I said the next part. "I'd love to work with you and Noah on the next One Night Only Event." I mouthed the words at Noah. 'Did you know she was going to offer something this big?' Publicly being a part of an event that is quickly becoming on par with Met and other large Galas is a huge deal. He nods his head yes at me with a big smile.
"I'll meet you with the paperwork for you to sign and if you want to take the offer. I'm also willing to negotiate. What you did last time with the event was a huge help. I feel the training you could offer the staff I plan to hire would be a great opportunity for everyone involved." Sharr went into full sell mode. Listening to her I realize why tech billionaires and socialites alike were killing themselves to get tickets to her event. She knew everyone who was everyone and more than a few people who should be someone one and weren't yet. The whole idea for next year's event at the Crocker Museum and it was bigger than the first. I had a feeling this one was going to sell out faster than the original. If anything, people would be fighting over these tickets. "So, I'll meet you at? ..." She asks, waiting for my answer. I was going to have Noah drop me off at the Crocker then have Eve pick me up but maybe that's not the best idea. She's at Noah's now. I should just meet her at Noah's and have a look at the paperwork there. I can even scan it to a lawyer for finer details and what not. I made my decision.
"I'll meet you at Noah's," I said. We went back and forth with pleasantries. I really liked Sharr as a professional in a creative space. She was someone I wanted to be like. She dealt with a massive amount of creatives really well. Kept things professional, and she's well respected. I had a lot to learn from her as my business was now it seem expanding. A smile that was with my whole heart as I watched Noah watch me on the call. He lean in as if it was the most comfortable relaxing thing ever, and I loved every fucking second. Hell, I mouthed to him. 'I love you,' behind me. He smiled even bigger at me. Kissing my cheek, his hand sliding under my top. We were getting in trouble on this damn call. Space Girls, birthday present still needed wrapping. Little man's birthday present was already wrapped up ready to go. But fuck if I couldn't use another week on this boat. We said our goodbyes over the phone then hung up. I sent a quick text to Eve about the new pickup. She sent me a fast couple of messages. I spent most of the ride back not taking pictures but in a slow make-out session. It was so damn lazy and natural.
The dock came too fast. And as Noah started mooring to the dock, the rest of the world came back with it. A text from Theo about the kid's birthday party recommending what I should bring. Then another buzz from clients as soon as my return timer went off. Of course Noah got us back right on time. The vacationnow app pushes all the non urgent work messages that I hide from myself. They launched themselves like an assault to my phone. Without Noah's arms around me, that solid spot was gone.
I picked up my bag and any vacation item I could think of that was mine. I removed myself from the boat like any visitor. The impermanence of my mark on his life is so obvious from the missing items. Then I headed to the gangway to get back to the dock where the trip started. In the distance Noah's 1800s partially restored ship. It needs to work but most of all it's an explore ship in need of an adventure. Stopped in my tracks steps before the gangway. I can do this, the real world isn't scary. Right?
His rough hand held out to mine to help me back to shore. "I got you," Noah says with a grin. Ya, I can go back to the real world with him. I take Noah's steady hand work worn calluses of long hard days. Filled with Noah I smile.
We headed to the truck, and I shot the kids a message about me coming soon. No answer of course at their dad's and he takes the phone so they don't lose it. My stomach tightens the closer we get to Sacramento proper. Even with him next to me, worry always eats at me. Relationships aren't magic and fucking your brains out don't always fix everything. Even if it was solid love making instead of just pure scratching an itch fucking.
Redwoods being the abodement of the tallest trees on earth, a canopy of green. Light blinking passes as we pass through the rows of trees. I tried to settle myself and again Noah settled me. He did it without even fucking trying. His hand rests in my lap and I grab hold as if it's a lifesaver. Even if I do drown he'd breathe for both of us. And why am I so fucking antsy? As if someones going to take it away from me any damn second. But the more I think about it the more I remember everything we had to go through just to get here. Just to get this fucking far. I'm guarding it so hard that I'm going to let my fear ruin it. My blood tight grip on Noah's hand loosens. The breathing I didn't know I wasn't doing well evens out.
We can do this.
I love him.
Slow blink and the flashing of the lights distilled through the redwood. As pretty as walking under long wedding arches. That extract of hope as we pass through that speckled light canopy lolling me away from the panic.
I can't do this if I don't trust.
If ever there was someone worthwhile to trust, it's Noah. When my eyes connect to Noah's determined gaze out the truck's driver's window a lot of it washes away. His sandy blonde hair was somewhat tamed shorter. Still the lion's mane is as thick and lushes as ever though. Neptune thumb rubbing my hand absentmindedly grounded me to his ocean. The one where I can fly or breathe underwater. And I let it go, instead of doubting I trusted. Watched him all the way back to Sacramento.
Still my benediction...Noah
A/n: Walking into this book never though that someday I'd have readers. Now I have some and yall are so damn dear to me. Recently I hit 50k reads on this book and I wanted to thank you for reading.
Thank you.
Thank you.
So, damn much and I say this as Tari did, with my whole damn heart.
-OP