𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐎𝐝𝐝𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥 ░ ᵗʰᵉ ²⁴ᵗʰ ᴺᶜᵀ ᵐᵉᵐᵇᵉʳ ✔

𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭

My phone rang, my mom's video calling me.I stood up before waving my phone, "Eomma's calling, I'll be right back" 

"Hi ma, bat kayo napatawag?"
[Hi mom,why did you suddenly call?]

"Andilim naman dyan!Di kita makita!"
[It's so dark there!I can't see you!]

"Bat ka napatawag?"
[Why did you call?]

She'd normally message me first to at least inform me in case I'm in either a meeting or during practice. It must be important enough for her to call me first.

"Oh there!We watched your video!Aba bakit
naman ganoon ang ilaw, di naman kita nakita ng maayos"
[Why is the lights like that, I can't see you well]

"May gagawin pa ako ma, may kailangan ka bang sabihin?"
[I have something else to do mom, do you need to say anything?]

I lost the excitement on continuing the call upon hearing her impressions about it. After seeing those comments I could've really used some praises..

I guess even my mother's not impressed by it..

"And why? Is that more important kesa
sa sarili mong nanay?"
[Is that more important than your own mom?]

Aaand.. There it goes.. I'm not really in the mood to get into a fight with her.. Specially with things like these.

"Ma, pagod kasi ako..I'm sorry may sasabihin ka pa ba?"
[Mom, I'm tired, do you have anything to tell me?]

"Ahh Valerie!I'm telling you, pag iyang pangarap mo
bumagsak!Hay naku uuwi kang luhaan sinisigurado ko sayo!"
[Once your dream fails!Ah you'll come
home crying I assure you!]

Sigh. All those months and they still don't like this pathway for me.. Can't I just get support from them? Or can they at least not mention about it failing?

"Okay ma, bye, ingat."
[Okay mom,bye, take care]

I decided to hung up right after.


Even without the direct words.I can feel from her voice that she just wants me to quit.I haven't talked to my father since I started preparing for debut.He probably thinks that I wouldn't managed to make it in 5 years.

Even though I debuted, I'm praying I make it longer than that..

"Gwaenchana?", I moved to the right-side of the stairs. "I don't know", I honestly just want to sleep.Hoping that tomorrow will bring me something better. I glance at him as he sit beside me, "It's just hard", I said, hunging my head low.

I took a deep breath before replying, "It's hard to fit the standards", I sighed. "You know.." "..I read it somewhere", I looked at him, eager to know it. "That, if you can't fit on the standards, you have to make a new standard", "because the first one is too small for you, so you make a new one", he added.