Everything I Didn't Say

The Dilemma

*Norah POV*
I woke up, and last night was the first thing on my mind. I noticed I was wearing Luke's flannel shirt, and realised he must have carried me to bed.
Matty must have been downstairs with everyone else, I could hear the laughter.
My head was throbbing, I could barely open my eyes because I was so tired. I couldn't be arsed with anyone, so I stayed in bed just thinking about my life.
Why had I only started to like Luke now? When I was in a happy relationship with Matty, and with complications with Michael- it didn't make sense. Luke was my friend, and it hurt that I could ruin this friendship if I ever said anything.
I suppose I always knew how I felt about him, but because he was there while I was going through a lot with everyone else, I never had the time to think about it.
Me and Michael have never technically told eachother how we feel about each other but it was always heavily implied. Nothing was needed to be said. Yet, I had to tell Luke something, he deserved to know.
Me and Michael had gone back and forth from liking eachother, to being friends so many times.
It all seemed so sudden to consider leaving a new, happy relationship, just for the sake of telling Luke. I wanted him to know. He knows me too well to know when something is wrong with me, if I'm not honest, he will get it out of me.
After a few hours of thinking, there was a knock at my door.
"Nor? Can I come in?", I recognised Luke's voice.
I groaned thinking about seeing him after I've been thinking about him so much.
"Yes, come in", I faked a smile as he entered.
"...are you feeling alright?", he nervously asked, "I told people you were ill because I thought you would want longer in bed"
"Yes it's fine. Thanks again for last night- I'm so embarrassed", I cringed
"It was obviously something serious or you wouldn't have reacted like that", he said.
My mouth opened as if to say something. Again, nothing came out except a stuttering.
"...what?", he laughed
"It doesn't matter anymore", I giggled, realising what I had done to him, exactly what I did to Michael in LA.
"...do you miss Cheshire?", he asked curiously, probably because that's why he thought I was upset
"Well, yeah! I miss my family, but it's not as bad as your family living in Australia", I said to turn the conversation back to him
"It's similar though. We can afford to go home, but you have to save up money for a train ticket", he said, "we have gotten used to it, but it takes a while"
"I know, I do miss it. You will have to come and visit Cheshire at some point", I said
"Yeah, we will go after Australia", he smiled
"...shit yeah Australia. That will be unbelievable", I grinned, "I can't wait to meet everyone"
The conversation felt normal. As if I didn't have that moment the night before, or thought about him before he walked in. Yes, the conversation felt slightly different, but in a good way. It felt better...like my dream.
I was giggling at Luke bitching about Ashton around girls, and Matty opened the door.
"Aw shit sorry...are you in the middle of something?", he asked
"No, it's fine. I'm going to go get some lunch or something?", Luke said and scooted past Matty in the doorway. He smiled at me behind him, teasing me and causing me to laugh.
Matty turned around and watched him walk down the stairs and turned slowly to me.
"I thought you were asleep?", he asked.
"I was, but Luke came in as I was getting up", I said suspiciously. Matty wasn't normally like this.
"You spend a lot of time with Luke don't you?", he shrugged.
"Yeah, he's like my best friend?", I said
"What about Charlotte?", he said defensively
"Well she is as well!", I said
"It's just weird how you were having a heart to heart with Luke, when we were all sat downstairs", he said, "he said you were 'ill' but you're fine?"
"Do you know what Matty? You can fuck off right now. Just fuck off", I said and started to throw some clothes on.
"What are you doing?", he asked in disgust, "this is a huge overreaction"
"Well clearly you can't handle a friendship maturely, so I fancy being a bit immature at the moment", I shrugged and stormed down stairs with my makeup bag in hand.
I was so angry, so quickly. I had never experienced anger like this until LA. But me getting defensive over Luke, wouldn't help my relationship with Matty- not that I wouldn't have wanted that in that moment.
Quickly swiping on a little bit of foundation, I slammed open the kitchen door.
"Who fancies the pub?", I shouted
"...it's like 12 in the afternoon", Calum laughed
"...yeah, and?", I shrugged
"I'm game", Ashton stood up and pulled Michael up with him, realising I was angry.
"We are walking there, by the way", I slammed their front door shut.
"...yes that's fine", Michael nervously said, "...what's wrong Nor?"
..............