Homosexual bestie

Chapter forty-four 🌈

~Y/N POV~

After Jimin left I went back to my bedroom to get changed from my pjs. Nothing special I just wore simple black sweatpants that were comfortable to wear at the moment along with a white t-shirt. I didn't plan in going anywhere but to lounge around the house unless something came up at the restaurant which my dad has taken over most of my jobs this last two weeks.

Once I was changed I paused for a moment in my bedroom remembering how Namjoon spoke of needing to speak to one another and it was now or never. It needed to be discussed but i didn't want to argue with him, its the last thing I wanted to do with him.

After several minutes of hyping myself up I gained the courage to leave my bedroom and walk towards the living room. There was no sound in the living room or through out the apartment but walking into the living room did I find Namjoon sitting over in the far end of the living room on a stool that he must of taken through from the kitchen to sit on.

He was staring at the floor with his hands entwined with one another. When he finally realises I entered the room he looks up at me but doesn't react nor does he blink. I hovered by the hallway before taking a breath and walking to the couch to sit on, propping a pillow behind me back to get comfy and settle down on the couch.

Namjoon just stares at me in silence until he looks away back to the floor again. I could see the wheels turning in his mind and I'm sure he's probably got a lot to say but doesn't know where to start off. I fiddled with my fingers nervously on my lap just in front of my big belly.

The silence was overbearing and I wanted to break it but I didn't know what to say.

"Seven months." Namjoon

I heard him finally speak, breaking the silence in the room. I just simply looked at him in slight confusion to why he would say those words until he speak again.

"You kept this from me for seven months. Why?" Namjoon

He flicks his dark eyes my way with a stone cold look that made it very hard to read what he was feeling.

"I-I don't know. I guess I was scared to."

"Why?" Namjoon

He quickly asks after my first response.

"Why would you be scared to tell me something like that? Did I give you any reason to be scared to tell me something so important?" Namjoon

I could sense he was getting angry with me so I have to be careful with what I say or how I react to what he says. I don't want to argue with him and its understandable why he'd be so angry.

"In a way yes. When I found out I was pregnant you practically blow up and made assumptions without giving me time to explain. It was off putting."

His face scrunched up as if he was reliving that moment, balling his fists up to look away from me by turning his head away to the side.

"But we still lived together, you could of mentioned it." Namjoon

"You were rarely home and when you were you either hid in you room or brought people back to sleep with and I had to sit and listen to it."

I spoke honestly to him. I might as well bring up everything and tell him how I felt about this. It's not that I didn't really want to, it's just like I never got the right time to tell him.

I noticed how his face soften slightly as if he remembers his sudden behaviour and his fist relax to place flat on his lap.

"You're right. I'm sorry but I was just trying to move on from you. I was just willing to try and do anything to get you out of my mind but it was impossible because you are in my life and I didn't want to remove you from it. I couldn't bare the thought so i'd rather be friends than not have you at all." Namjoon

His sweet words got to me a little, since I'm the same. I'd rather have him as a friend than nothing at all despite my love for him.

"I was going to tell you one day though but that happened to be the same day Hyuna showed up and announced her news. After that I just didn't want to trouble you with more stress so I left the matter alone."

Namjoons face again scrunched up in anger and disgust at the mention of Hyuna and he scoffed harshly.

"Well she wont be a bother anymore I can assure you that." Namjoon

I was confused to what he meant about that and frowned worriedly at him. What did he do?

He looks at me, noticing my facial expression and widens his eyes before he chuckles amusingly.

"Oh Y/n relax it's not what you're thinking. I just paid her to stay away from me as well as my friends. I wouldn't trust that woman to try and do something stupid." Namjoon

"Why pay her? That's what she would of wanted right? Your money?"

He nods and pressed his lips together.

"Yes but if it got her away from you too then so be it. Like I said I don't trust her to come back and try something dodgy." Namjoon

I didn't say anything but lean back into my pillow and rub my belly soothingly. It's just out of habit now plus it's comforting. His sights flickered to my stomach and he sighs sadly.

"I wish things were different." Namjoon

Again I was confused to what he meant and I stared back at him in question, wondering what he meant.

"What do you mean? You mean about the baby? Do you not want him?"

I was becoming more panicked the more I thought. Maybe he didn't want the baby?

But Namjoon quickly shook his head in agreement, taken back by what I asked of him.

"Oh no. God no. I don't mean that. What I meant was that you and I were together as a couple and I could of experienced all of this pregnancy stuff with you. I just missed out on a lot I guess." Namjoon

His sadden expression has me grow guilty for my actions on not telling him sooner among with my rejection to him when he confessed that he loved me.

"I'm so sorry Joonie. I really am."

I sniffed suddenly. My emotions getting the better of me and a tear of regret slipped from my eye to fall down my cheek. Namjoon stares at me for a moment but then stands up from his stool and comes to sit beside me, wrap his arm around my shoulder and pull me to his side for a side hug.

"You don't need to cry now Y/n. I'm over it. I just want to look forward to the future with you and the baby. The three of us, together. I promised I was going to take care of you both and that's what I'm going to do." Namjoon

I felt his lips on the top of my head and I snuggled closer to him to which he didn't protest thankfully,

"But there is one thing I do want to say and you have no choice in the matter." Namjoon

I stiffen in worry to what he has to say. The way he spoke so seriously compared to the way he spoke when he came to sit next to me concerned me greatly.

"W-What is it?"

I asked but cursed to myself for stuttering nervously.

"That there is something that I have to do first before this baby is born and you cant say a word about it." Namjoon

Oh god what is it?

"Oh yeah?"

I felt like I could cry again. However Namjoon hums a yeah and then leans down closer to my ear and whisper something that was unexpected and shocked me out of my socks.

"I would like to take you one a proper date, just the two of us alone." Namjoon