Homosexual bestie

Chapter twenty-three 🌈

~Y/N POV~

Work today was definitely busy, I felt like I couldn't get a breather all day, but finally the day is done and I've come home late.

I haven't spoken to Namjoon at all because to be honest for the past two days I've been avoiding him. I didn't want to talk about it and I know of course he single and free to do what he wants but I can't help but feel hurt because of what he once told me. I guess his words meant a lot more to me than I thought and I clearly didn't forget them. I could never.

I did spend the night at Jimins house and told him the half truth of why I left. I only told him I left because he was having sex really loud and I had to get out of them because it made me feel uncomfortable. Jimin understood that thankfully, he said once he had to leave yoongis place one night because he was having sex with a girl really loud too so he knew what it was like to get uncomfortable sometimes.

When I reached my front door I quickly texted Jimin telling him I just got home and to apologise for not texting him back earlier. I was so caught up in work I didn't even notice the text I got from him earlier and I felt so bad for not replying to it.

Once done that I put my phone away in my pocket and unlocked the door and stepped in closing it behind me. When I turned back around to walk towards my bedroom I was surprised to see Namjoon sitting in the living room alone and in the dark with no tv on.

"Oh, h-hi Namjoon."

I curse at myself for stuttering and smiled at him to which he only returned with a much smaller one. He stood up from the sofa and put his hands in the pockets of his sweat pants.

"Hi y/n. Could I talk to you about something please?" Namjoon

His gaze was lowered to the floor and I knew exactly what he wanted to talk about and I for one was not ready for that type of talk, not right now at least.

"Okay? But could I get a shower first? It's been along day."

Thank god I have a day off tomorrow though.

"Sure I'll wait." Namjoon

He sat back down again and turned into the tv. I quickly whisked myself away to my bedroom to gather a towel and to the bathroom for a quick yet very hot shower to relax myself from the stress.

Once I was done with my shower I ran across the hall to my bedroom and quickly changed to my pjs and back to the living room, dreading this whole conversation that's to come.

I slowly sat down on the sofa next to him but keeping a small distance between us. He turned off the tv and turned his body to face me while I stare at the coffee table.

"I'm sorry." Namjoon

After he spoke I looked straight up at him with a little frown to which he only held a blank face but his eyes failed him. They were filled with guilt and sadness, he was apologising.

"I'm sorry for bringing back people to the apartment and doing such things while you're around. It was inconsiderate and disrespectful and I'm very sorry." Namjoon

I shook my head and patted his hands that laid on his lap. His eyes lit up in surprise of my action staring down at our hands before back to me.

"You don't have to be. You're single so you're free to do what you want. I understand that."

"That still doesn't excuse it y/n. I should of waited until you were out or at least been quieter." Namjoon

"You've have sex with people before while we've lived together. This time wouldn't of been any different."

He sighed and grabbed my hands to hold them tight, now looking down at our entwined hands. All I could do was watch his face, that was starting to show through his mask he obviously put up.

"That was before we ever got to together y/n. It's different this time." Namjoon

His voice almost came out as a whisper because of how soft his voice came from him. All I did was stare at his beautiful face that still refused to look at me. I've been trying to push away all feelings I have for him because I know it won't work out between us and it could damage anything we have together and I'm not one for taking risks like that. I don't want to lose him.

I love him with all my heart but I have feelings for Jimin too and it makes me feel guilty to feel this way about any of them. They're both great guys and I don't deserve either one of them.

"Well it's okay. I'm not mad."

That's all I could figure out to say but he quickly shook his head still refusing to look at me.

"No it's not y/n. I wouldn't of liked it if I heard you and Jimin having..." Namjoon

He stopped himself from talking further and bit his own lip.

"Let's just move on from it then. Shall we?"

I chuckled and he finally moves his sights up from our hands to look me in the eye to release his bottom lip from his teeth and smile with a nod.

"Okay. So we're good?" Namjoon

"Of course that's what I've been telling you!"

I slipped my hands from his hold and leaned over the small space between us and pulled him in for a hug, but because he's so much more bigger than he it ended but with me being pressed against his body.

I've missed his hugs since he has been understandably distant so maybe this could be a start to getting our friendship back to normal but I have said that before and it didn't turn out that way.

Listening to his fast heart beat in my ear was so peaceful to me, it actually relaxed me to the point I wanted to fall asleep. I've been tired all day and now this was not helping at all.

"I have one more question y/n, if that's okay?" Namjoon

"Sure."

I mumbled, with a little nod.

"My parents are having dinner next week at their house. They've asked me to come and I was wondering if you could come with me, please?" Namjoon

I know all too well house his parents are with him especially his dad after finding out that he likes men but I guess now Namjoon has figured out that he definitely likes both he can reveal the news to them, if he's ready too that is.

"Yes I'll go with you. Don't worry."

I patted his chest, curling up more to cuddle my best friend on the sofa. We use to do this all the time before we has sex so there's no shame in doing this again.

"Thank god. You'll be a life saver y/n. Thank you." Namjoon

He was relieved when I said I would go and I couldn't be more happier. I'll help him anytime he asks me, always.

I closed my eyes when we both became silent. Namjoon shifted into the sofa to lean back against the arm of the sofa and rest his head on top of mine, his arms wrapped around me.

I couldn't help but fall asleep in my best friends warmth.