"Can you give me a specific incident?" Raising my head, I looked up at her. My eyes saying no but my mouth starting to reveal a hidden truth.
"This was the second time that he cheated on me..."
"He did it again Nylah, I- I cant do this." I cried into the phone. My sobs getting louder as each words rolled off of my tongue.
"Brooklyn just breathe baby. I'm on my way over there right now just relax." My chest heaved up and down as I began to lose my breathe. It hurt so much because I gave my all to him, I gave my life to him and he threw it away...just like everyone else.
I stared at the wall, not wanting to allow the voices in my head to get the best of me. The voices that were telling me that he doesn't care. The only person who I thought cared, didn't. If no one cared then what was the point of me living?
Making my way to the bathroom, I stared into the mirror. I looked at my mascara smeared face and my messed up lipstick. I stared straight into my dark eyes. The eyes that had all of the soul drained out of them.
My phone ringing snapped me out of my thoughts. Seeing his face and name spread across my screen caused nothing but anger. Him calling my phone since I left earlier, it only made me feel sad and angry.
"FUCK!" I screamed while throwing my phone. I slid down on the wall with tears streaming down my face. I grabbed a fistful of my hair and gripped it while crying. I looked up and stared at something that caught my eye. The shiny blade twinkling, telling me to pursue it.
I hesitantly grabbed the blade off of the counter, crying as I brought it closer to my skin. I bit my trembling bottom lip before swiping the blade across my arm. The breaking skin bringing relief to me. The blood dripping giving me a sense of breakthrough.
"...I continued to cut all down my arm. I was cutting until I passed out and woke up in a hospital room. They put me on suicide watch for about a year." I was so numb to that story that I couldn't even shed a tear.
"So why would you go back to him? Why go back to the man who you almost killed your self for?"
"That's why. Cause he's the man I almost killed myself for. He had that much of an impact on me. There was no reason for me to live if he wasn't with me. So I- I went back because I felt that I couldn't live without him." This being newfound information to myself. This being one of the main answers to something that I didn't know of. This being a new open door.
"So you love this man so much that you would kill and die for him. Does he love you the same?" I sat there and stared at her, not really knowing what to say.
"I- I believe he does because-."
"Because he told you...correct?" I sat there for a minute and began to fidget with my fingers. I was completely lost for words, my emotions being the only answer to her interrogating question.
"He- he loves me, I know he does." I sat there and repeated that same statement to myself. That was until Ms.Wright spoke up again.
"Ok, let's just continue on with the poem. This line reads I loved you so deeply, more than I could bear. What does this mean to you and how does it connect to you?"
