I'm Still Standing

37

Rachel

I've learned a lot from this whole knee situation. One is that being independent doesn't mean being by yourself. It doesn't mean that I have to figure everything out alone, it's just that I can be able to figure things out by myself and I can still be a be able to enjoy the company of another. Two is that it is very hard to do anything without being able to get around. Just the simplest things are now a obstacle and I never want to hurt my knee again. Not like that at least. And the most important thing I've learned is when you're so used to being on the go and keeping your mind busy, when you're forced to stop everything feels like it stoped too. I felt like I was stuck and I couldn't get away from the problems that found me.

But today was a big step as I don't have to use the crutches and I don't have to sleep in the brace anymore. I could do my physical therapy and if the pain is awful I can get pain meds again but they make me sleepy so I don't really like to take them. But sometimes I'm going to need that. For the most part I was free, free to move on, free to run away. But there was still a long way to go.

So I go to the physical therapists office to do my physical therapy nice and early this morning. It was taking place of my morning run and I missed being active more than I would like to admit. I wanted more than anything to be okay by the end of the playoffs so I could skate with Jonny again. I know it's a long shot but I would do anything to be back to normal again. If that's even a option at this point.

"Look at you getting around without crutches" my PT says and smile. Jonny recommended him and he was quite good at his job. He worked with the guys at the blackhawks and Jonny promised that this was a good deal.

"The pain is only as bad as I let it be" I remind him.

"That's right. But still, the people who had reconstructive surgery as you had are usually limping in here at that point. And you look like you're ready to roll" he claims.

"Can't keep me down too long" I smile.

"Looks like it" he nods.

We get the physical therapy underway before he iced me down. The swelling was a bit much but other than that my leg felt fine. There's some pain here and there but I've managed it pretty well, nothing I can't handle. And now I'm ready to face the world again.

So I walk back to the apartment because now I can and the weather was getting nice. The Hawks were starting up with the the Canucks series so Jon was pretty busy. He made time for me but he has a job to do and he wants so bad to be good at what he does. And he will only be good if he works hard and no one works harder than him, he makes sure of it.

So I head on up to the apartment ready to make some breakfast and hang out with my dog friends. With it beings finals time classes are over with. We just have to take the tests now and hopefully I'll be done with school. Maybe I can finally see my dream start to become a reality and start up a restaurant. Wouldn't that be something?

I get in and I see a big bouquet of flowers sitting on the dining room table. They really lit up the room with all the different colors and types. I smile big before walking over and admiring them for a bit. I've never seen such a big bouquet of flowers or such a variation. I see a card sitting there next to them and decide to read it.

"Dear Rachel,

I know it's been pretty crazy with your doctors appointments and the playoffs and school and family, so I figured tonight we can have a date night and slow things down a bit. I know you want to walk and stretch your legs after being on crutches for so long so I was thinking we could stroll Michigan Ave and find something that interests us. Be ready by 5 and make sure the dogs are taken care of. You know how they get.

Can't wait to see you, I'll be back to pick you up.

Love, Jonathan."

I set the note next to the flowers and continue to take them in. There was about 30 flowers and hardly any of them were the same color. It just goes to show how thoughtful he was to plan this and find a bouquet as insane as this one. It feels good to know there is a pretty good reason I'm fighting so hard to get my life back. And it had everything to do with him.

So I jump in the shower after breakfast and get changed into something cute but comfortable. I take the dogs out and study a little before I was ready to go. Jon was here at 5 on the dot and we hop in his car. He takes us to the other side of the city and we start our trek. I wanted to dress all cute like but a gigantic robo leg kinda puts a stop to a lot of things. It was big and clunky but it took some pressure off my knee and prevented it from being furthered damaged. But it serves its purpose and that's all I needed.

"You look beautiful" Jon tells me and I start to blush. I try to turn away but he grabs my chin and pulls me back. "Rachel, you are beautiful" he insists.

"And why should I believe you" I tease.

"Because you trust me right" he asks.

"With my life" I promise.

"And you think I'm pretty smart" he continues.

"The smartest man I know" I insist.

He stops us from walking before turning to me. He moves in so close that I can practically hear his heart beating. "Then believe me when I say that you are beautiful. Inside and out" he promises.

"It's hard not to believe you" I smirk.

"I am told I'm a pretty good captain" he jokes.

"I really think you are. Any guy would be lucky enough to play on your team" I insist.

"You think so" he asks.

"I know so" I smile.