Steven Universe fic

Part 12 Chapter Five: Time Together

Steven sat at Connie's dining table as Dr. Maheshwaran prepared breakfast, he set Spinel's still unformed gem on the table while Connie sat down next to him.

He could barely sleep throughout the night, worry plagued his mind, save for the moments Priyanka would intermittently turn the lights on in the living room to make sure he was indeed alone.
Her overprotective nature had lessened with gem stuff, but when it came to his relationship with Connie the woman made it incredibly concise and clear that she wanted constant eyes on them.

The mild irritation of that helped alleviate his fear of what could come.
He glanced down at Spinel's gem, hoping she would reform soon.

"Here you are." Dr. Maheshwaran set down two fluffy pancakes on each of their plates to eat. "Make sure you put your dishes in the dish washer, not the sink." She added pulling on her lab coat and parking herself on the couch, in such a way that she could see them eat.

"You're still worried about her?" Connie asked, digging into her pancake. Steven nodded somberly, pouring syrup over his own, smothering the thing.

"I always get worried when the gems poof..." he murmured, not adding that he was particularly worried because he knew what Spinel was thinking, feeling, fearing and he couldn't get the thoughts loose from his head. He wanted to console her and thank her and beg for forgiveness all at once.

Steven quickly finished his pancake and headed towards the door, feeling Priyanka's eyes like daggers in his back the longer he sat next to Connie.

"I'm gonna go check on the gems." He said, hurrying out the door to evade Dr Maheshwaran's deadly gaze.

Steven thumbed Spinel's gem as he meandered toward New Homeworld, hoping that she would take the opportunity to at least try to reform. He sighed, pulling the gem from his pocket and staring at it.

"Come on, Spinel." He mumbled, licking his finger and rubbing the dirt from it. Maybe that would make her feel better? Good enough to reform?
Apparently not.

Steven met with Peridot at the center warp, she excitedly recounted the night, she had somehow roped all three gems into marathoning Camp Pining Hearts with her and Lapis.
Amethyst groaned in discomfort everytime the green gem spoke of the subject, while Pearl seemed equally enthused about the series as Peridot. The two bantered and bickered over their preffered pairings the entire way to the beach house.

"She hasn't reformed yet?" Pearl asked, her attention being drawn from Peridot's ven diagram toward the pink gem in Steven's hands.

"No, I don't know why- she reformed so fast at the kindergarten..do you think white broke her when Connie poofed her?" He asked, worry growing in his mind at the thought. He turned to Garnet, a pleading look in his eyes.

"Why isn't she reforming, Garnet?"

The fusion shrugged, "she doesn't want to."

Steven's worried face turned somber and he looked to the pink heart in his hands, turning it over to examine it.
Why wouldn't she want to reform yet?
They weren't at the kindergarten, she wasn't with Aquamarine, she was here, safe, with him.
She knew that, didn't she?
He shoved the gem back in his pocket and began to help with the beach house. The water damage was bad enough as it was, but the infinity room was almost obliterated.
Bismuth and Peridot began reconstruction on the interior of the infinity room, pulling out panels and rewiring things to somehow make it work again.
While Garnet Pearl Amethyst and he cleaned up the beach house, pulling all the furniture out to dry in the sun.
Steven made his way into his room, setting Spinel's gem on the his bed table before picking up the things that had been scattered about the floor as if someone was looking for something in his room.
He didn't have the energy or fortitude to clean though. He just wanted to lie in bed and never get up again.
Not even to eat.

He sat down on the floor, picking at the zipper of his jacket before pulling it off and throwing it on the bed behind him.
He glanced back at Spinel's gem, and hesitated, before picking it up tenderly and setting in in a little duvet in his jacket. He sat back down, looking at the floor.

"Spinel," he mumbled softly, hoping she could hear him. "I'm really sorry I left you in the garden...I- I know I promised I'd never bring you back there...I know you probably won't forgive me for it."

He tried to find the words he wanted to say, hoping that if he spoke to her about things, then maybe she would want to talk to him again.

"Even though we fused...I know I still hurt you and-" he took in a deep breath, trying to calm his sudden trembling. "And I wanted to thank you, for protecting me."

He knocked his head back, hitting the bed softly and letting his eyes drift to the silent gemstone. Tears threatened to fall as he worked up the courage to continue, slowly crawling back on the bed and resting his chin in front of the gem.

"I know you were scared, I know you were confused and hurt and you felt bad." He couldn't think of the word he wanted, bad was the only thing that came to his mind, bad, everything felt bad around her, in an excruciatingly painful way. It was something like guilt and hate and sorrow and self loathing wrapped up in a flurry in her head and he got whipped up into it the moment they fused. It was strangely telling.

And no wonder she had trouble explaining her emotions, all of them were strangely nameless.

"Spinel, please reform." He begged, cupping the gem as tears began to fall. He pulled the cold rock to his face, silently pleading for the gem to return.

"I know you don't want to..but I need you to come back. I need you to say something, Spinel... please." He cried, his breath caught in his throat, recognizing the agonized tone of his voice. He sounded like her.
When she had begged him to not leave her.
In the garden.

He reluctantly set the gem back in his jacket, sitting back and wiping the tears from his eyes with small sniffles.
She didn't want to talk to him. And he couldn't blame her.
Why would she?
All he had done is hurt her or let her get hurt. Why would she want to even be around him?

The gemstone quietly rose in the air, as Spinel reformed while he looked down at his hands, lost in his guilt.

"Steven.." her voice was quiet and soft, but he heard it nonetheless and his head shot up in shock.

She stood before him, her face streaked with pain, confusion and discomfort. She averted her eyes, gently tugging on her arm as he stared at her.

Steven didn't move, he simply sat there in astonishment at her, his tears returning, though his joy was squandered by guilt, the way she looked at him.
Made him feel bad.