Just like me: phan

Just like me: phan pt91

*Phils pov*

It was soon, it was so so soon, and Dan's arms locked around me were the false sense of security that lead me to believe he'd be there in another 2 hours. I wondered what he'd look like in another years time, would he have grown? would he have dyed his hair? I didn't know, I didn't want to. Because even though I did want Dan in a year, I already had him then, and I didn't want to think about being lonely, or the changes Dan would make without me being there.

The tears hadn't dried up yet and I was expecting to have wet cheeks for most of the next year. But those 2 hours, they felt like 2 seconds. I guess you could relate it to a race, you know how they always tell you to keep running as fast as you can until you reach the finish line, and not to slow down in the last few meters? Well, this wasn't a race, and maybe all I wanted to do was slow down, all I wanted was those two hours to last a life time.

After a long hug Dan had left the room, he said he was getting water, but I heard him wonder in and out of my room, I didn't really care to check, although I was curious. Dan did usually know what he was doing, after a few moments he came back to sit with me again.

'What am I going to do tonight?' I whispered, as if tonight was going to be the only night I would suffer, like the other 364 were going to be any better.

Dan was quiet for a few moments.

'You know that bear I gave you at the fair?' He asked, raising an eyebrow.

'Yes' I nodded, remembering the large soft toy Dan had won me. 

'I want you to hold that close tonight, and if any bad thought or memory enters your brain I want you to believe it's me' He bit his lip, and turned away from me, knowing the words hurt him, knowing he couldn't be there in person to help.

'What will you do?' I asked.

'I have the bravery lion, Phil, and when I hold that tonight, you better believe I'll be thinking of you' He smiled sadly.

I nodded, nestling my head in the crook of his neck once again.

'We've only got 2 hours'

'I know'

'What do we do?'

'I don't know'

'Let's set fire to the school' 

The sides of Dan's mouth peaked up.

'No Phil' He laughed quietly.

It was quiet for a few minutes before Dan stood up, and reached a hand out to me. The action made my heart flip, as it was the action that lead us to be where we were. It was also the first contact I had with Dan that didn't result in me crying. It showed he cared, he wanted to help.

I took his hand, and he lead me to one of the windows.

'Wait here, I've got an idea, it's just...'

'It's just what?'

'I made you something...it's...it's kinda dumb' He stuttered.

'Oh' I smiled. 'Really? That's so sweet, what is it?' 

'I'll go get it'

Dan left the room, and walked into the kitchen, while I stayed leaning by the side of the window. Dan came back moments later with a small cardboard box that was taped together quite sloppily.

'I wanted to do this, because I thought maybe it would help. I know you're used to turning to boxes when you're hurt, so I thought if I made you one, with something a little more positive inside, it would help you to stop' He croaked.

He handed me the box, I turned it over in my hands, and there, scrawled right at the top of the tiny object, was the word BRAVE.

I looked up at him with teary eyes, and he nodded, signifying that I should open it; so I did.

My hands fiddled with the poorly attached lid of the box and I finally lifted it off. Inside were tiny slips of paper, like the ones you'd find in a fortune cookie. I picked one out and read it aloud.

'Sunsets and Ferris wheels' 

I softly smiled to myself before picking out another.

'Shooting stars and car rooftops' I looked up at him. 'Dan, this is beautiful'

'Sorry if it smells like pizza, it was the only cardboard I could find' He murmured.

I leaned up to kiss him on the lips.

'It's perfect' I whispered.

He nodded, taking the box from my hands and placing it where the majority of my suitcases were, by the door. 

He walked back over the window and dug his hands into his pockets.

'You had an idea?' I queried.

He nodded. flicking the lock on the window and opening it up.

'You think we could get up to the roof from here?' He asked, eyes wide.

'Knowing you, I'm sure there's a way' I laughed. 'What's with you and roofs?' 

'It's sort of a detachment from the world, I love sitting on my roof. It's a little further away from everything else' He spoke while sticking his head out of the window to see how far up the roof was.

'Oh' 

'We don't have to go up if you don't want to, I just thought it would be nice to-'

'I love sitting on roofs with you, Dan' I cut him off, needing him to know I always loved his spontaneous ideas.

'Then get over here' He laughed once again reaching a helpful hand out toward me, and my heart hurt a little that time, becuase I knew in another hour I wouldn't be able to reach back.