[57] For just being you

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[Amara's P.O.V]

There were no words in the English dictionary that would describe how I felt right now. Justin was finally free from the gang, there was no reason for me to worry about him getting hurt or possibly killed anymore.

This boy is perfect for me. He's all that I want and we got through SO MANY obstacles together. There's really nothing that I can think of that would match the humongous amount of love that I'm feeling for him. And I know that he feels the same way, he loves me just as much, he cares about me and is protective of me. His existence is like a fucking blessing to me and I'm just so fucking happy right now.

When I broke our kiss, it was like I felt a new version of myself. A version that's free from all the worries that's been clouding my head about him. Now I just loved him purely and he was ALL I ever wanted.

His breath was hot against my face as he looked at me with eyes that held an enormous amount of love and lust. My breath hitched as I felt intense under his stare. I brought my arms around his neck and kissed him again. He brushed his tongue on my bottom lip and I opened my mouth and our tongues crashed against each other. I was running out of breath when he moved his lips and brought them to my neck, licking, kissing and sucking. I unintentionally moaned and heard him groan against my neck. He went lower to my collarbone and continued to kiss me, sending me to a world of different emotions. I then felt like more, I craved for more.

Bringing his lips back to mine, I leaned back on the bed and took him with me that he was now on top of my body. My hands went into his hair as I continued to kiss him fiercely with so much passion and need. I wrapped my legs around his waist and heard him groan once again. I started kissing his jawline and going lower. I licked his neck and he pressed his lower body down against mine to make me feel the great need he had for me. A sensation laced itself between the middle of my legs, throwing me off to a whole different planet.

I was going to take his shirt off when he suddenly moved away from me. He got to his feet and breathed out loudly, running a hand from his face to his hair.

"What's wrong?" I asked and his eyes landed to me again. I couldn't help but travel my eyes lower to the huge bulge in his pants. Seeing this, he blushed cutely and he grabbed a pillow and placed it in front of his pants.

"What are you doing?" I asked, not quite sure why he stopped. It was the first time ever that I wanted to go further with him but he turned me down. Wasn't I sexy enough? I do not understand.

I looked down to my hands and played with the sheets, not really feeling like looking at him right now. A part of me felt embarrassed about the entire situation, how could I think that Justin would want to have sex with me? I'm the girl that was sexually abused by her uncle after all.

Feeling like the room is becoming smaller, I jumped off the bed and walked out of the room, leaving Justin standing inside. I felt tears threatening to fall as I rushed to the bathroom to calm myself down.

Just as I was about to shut the door, Justin placed his palms on the door, preventing me from closing it. Frustratingly, I walked away from him and stood on the other side of the bathroom. Justin walked in and looked at me with worry covering his face. He looked down and swallowed.

"I'm sorry " He apologised and I looked at him, confused why he would apologise.

"Babe I want our first time to be meaningful. Not that I think there would be a time where our sex wouldn't be meaningful, I'm just saying that I want our first time to be special, not just in the heat of the moment." He started walking closer to me "I love you and I want to make love to you. You're really sexy and if I was just another guy, I'd have jumped at the opportunity earlier. But I'm your boyfriend that cares about you so deeply. I want to make sure you're ready before we make any decisions. You mean the world to me and I want literally everything I do with you to be really special and close to your heart."

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