Loving You Book 1 (Emmerdale)

Chapter 19❤

Authors Note: I also forgot to metion that the part of Anna is potrayed by Amanda Seyfried in my fanfiction! I will add a pic. I've just forgotten to.

Thanks for all the love and support! Lauren💜xx

(Ross's P.O.V)
I stroked my hand through her hair as we made our way into the bedroom. Just taking off her top, I kissed her.. we just touched one another. I had been yearning for her hands to touch me. I placed the condom on... seeing her bite her lip made me go stiff.."You look sooo hot..." I laid into her. She moaned as my lips travelled down her neck. "I feel really hooot... ah..." My kisses got to the lower parts of her body as I felt her fingers dig into my back. "Ah babe.. Just keep going.."

We wrapped ourselves in the duvet at about 11.00pm. "That was interesting.." Her eyes shined in the darkness. "It was. It's not a mistake though. I wanted it to happen." I kissed her forehead. Pulling her against me. "I love you." He is just the best dad. "How do you think Anna is getting on with Will?" I said I would ring her later. "He's been our friend since we were at school. He's pretty smart. He did a year at uni studying Medicine." Ross sat up and yawned. "It's so late.. I'm really hungry." I slapped his stomach! "You're always hungry babe."

He made some toasties. I felt a bit hungry. It was harder hiding from the illness, knowing I had Tobias, I had to think about him. "Is that nice?" I nodded.. saying yes. "We should go away somewhere. Take our little boy away whilst he's young. He might like to explore the world." Ross pulled me close. "We can do that.." He kissed my neck. I really thought about having a future with Ross. Would it work? Would I become too scared again? We went back upstairs.. as we sat near one another. I heard his phone ring. 'Yeah?' He went outside. I texted Dad.. asking him what he was doing tonight.

I'm just at home with Megan. Everything ok?x

I could hear Ross downstairs.. 'No Dad. She does not know. She'll leave again with Tobias. All I need to do is keep the secret. She does not need anymore stress.' I backed away from the stairs. I knew it. I went to get a packet of sweets from my bag, along with some laxatives. I texted Dad.

He's been lying.. again. Am I able to stay?x

I made sure that my bag was packed. I went into my little boy's bedroom. Seeing him sleep.. I saw this little body that was just growing. My hand reached his cheek.. stroking it. I needed to protect him. I made sure I had everything. Anna texted me along with Dad.

Are you ok?Xx

Yes sweetheart. The door is open. Come over when you're ready. X

I replied to Anna's message as I heard Ross close the door.

No. Long story. I'll be at Home Farm. Xx

I picked up my sleepy toddler.. just held him. Trying not to cry, he continued to sleep. I went downstairs to go and put him in his pushchair. Ross was still outside I think. I put my coat on. Opening the front door, I made my way to Home Farm. I think I was done. We have stolen moments... they go really quickly, one minute, I'm battling my disorder, trying to look after Tobias. The next, I'm kissing my first love.. it's messy. I cannot put Tobias through this anymore.

Megan opened the door. "I'm done." I just cried as she offered a hug. I took it. "He's dealing again. He promised that he would get help." She sat with me in the living room as she clearly said that I needed some comfort. "I'm like his drug. When he's low, he needs a quick fix. I have Tobias. Our child.. when he's fine, he does not want to know me. It messes with my feelings."

Megan rubbed my shoulder. "I've been through silmilar things. Maybe you're right. You have to focus on your son. Your Dad has been worried that something has been going on.." I felt so invaded. I know Dad means well, but it's my buisness. We've always been close, but when Mum died, he became a recluse. He would stay in the house all day, cry by himself. Just lock himself away.." Megan said that she knew excatly what that felt like. "I've been there. Raising Eliza with Jai wasn't easy. We argued, distanced a bit.. I had to focus on my little girl. Then, we ended. I knew then that I had to get myself sorted." I just heard Tobias crying.. "Hey you. What's wrong baby?" I took him out of his pushchair and sat back on the sofa with him. "Hello you. You're too cute.." He looked at Megan weirdly. "Have you decided what to do about the baby?" She shook her head. "Your dad knows that something is up. I cannot lie to him."