I promised you all that I wouldn't do it again.
With your signatures you signed, entrusting my words.
I told you that I was determined to sacrifice what was deemed necessary to graduate, to stand beside you all and walk across the stage.
You believed me.
And I did.
But there was something else that you agreed to.
You all trusted me, and I failed you.
I failed you, not me.
Because I can stand in front of you and show you that I'm worth more than a passing spirit,
I've proven to all of you that I'm not a small memory in your lives.
Yet I broke it. I broke that other half of the promise.
You all knew about my self harm
The scars were there on my wrist--on my arms
And I tried to tell myself that it was only a temporary fix.
Today, those scars are long healed
After the first time I broke that promise...
After the blood was already spilled
Even though it was the last time I broke the promise
I still broke it.
If all of you would hear me say these words
You would tell me that I kept it in the end
But as the ring is broken today
The thought will always remain in me that I failed you all.
-
Written: Nov 23rd-29th?
Originally named: A Broken Promise.
The Promise: I told my friends that they should sign my ring to remind me that I made an impact in their life. That I shouldn't self harm because they believe in me so I should believe in me. I lost faith in myself and gave into self harm. Today, I am glad to say that though I am.
YOU ARE READING
A Barrier Meant To Be Broken
PoetryA journal of a young adult with a dream. This book contains poems and collected thoughts of their journey that started April 25th, 2018. At the age twenty-two they find themselves stuck between cultures, and more than two.
