Just The Beginning (Justin Bieber)

Rumors

"Not in the mood, be quiet."

"Well guess what, I'm not in the mood to have you ignore me and tell me you hate me when I'm obviously still crazy for you. I'm also not in the mood for stupid rumours going around that aren't true. I'm really not in the mood for anything right now but I have to deal with it." I spat back and turned off the TV with the extra remote.

"Justin, turn it back on!"

"No, talk to me."

"Fine, you want me to talk to you? Fine. Go ahead, say what you need because in five minutes I'm turning my show back on."

"Why are you mad at me?"

"Why am I mad at you? Are you seriously asking me that question right now? You literally got as drunk as you possibly could for whatever reasons you have-- I have no idea, and then you almost had sex with one person in the world who would agree to doing that with you. You can say you didn't know what you were doing all you want but you have to pretty fucking sick for me to believe that." She rolled her eyes.

"So you hate me?"

"Never said that." She crossed her arms.

"Last night you did."

"What are you talking about?"

"Last night while you were sleeping I asked you if you loved me and you said you hated me."

"You can't just sneak into my room and ask me that, Justin. I was sleeping, I didn't know what was happening, and if you need me to say it, no I don't hate you. Your obviously still my best friend and I could never hate you.. Now just let me be mad at you," she said furrowing her eyebrows and focusing her attention back on the TV, turning it back on.

"So are we still dating?" I asked, fidgeting with my fingers. She just shrugged. "Okay fine, I'll take that as a yes. And if you want to be mad at me, cool. Whatever. But I hope you know that because of you being mad at me for my stupid mistake, I'm miserable. I've cried myself to sleep the past two nights and I have to wear shades every time we go out just cause my eyes are never not red. I'm pretty sure I haven't smiled either, so there. There's proof for you that I think I'll literally go insane if you keep ignoring me. I understand that I made a mistake but I don't know what I did to deserve you not even looking at me or speaking to me," I spat out and walked away to the kitchen.

"Justin..." She said quietly as she sat up on the couch and turned around to look at me.  I glanced up at her before focusing on pouring myself a glass of water. "I'm sorry, okay? I didn't know you were this sad and I shouldn't have been ignoring you. Your my best friend and I care about you a lot and I never meant for that night to hurt either one of us.. Just don't be sad, okay? Please.."

"How can I not be sad?" I mumbled, not loud enough for her to hear.

"Justin.."

"Yeah, sure. Whatever. I'll leave you alone too if that's what you want."

"Just... Come watch a movie with me," she said patting a seat on the couch next to her. I agreed and came over and sat next to her while she cuddled her head into my chest. 

After a while she fell asleep. I layed there awhile, just looking at her. God, I miss her so much. I know shes right in front of me but I miss her being mine. I miss being able to kiss her whenever I wanted and being able to tackle her into a hug and just being able to make her smile. 

I looked at my phone for the time and saw that it was 11:27am. Ryan and Chaz left early this morning on their flight back to Canada but I said goodbye to them last night. It feels so empty with just Emma and I here.